AIBU to be annoyed when I message a question that needs an answer, the person has seen it but doesn't bother to respond?

[CrapBag]

There are a few of us going out in a couple of weeks. The driver's (who offered and prefers to drive) car has broken down and we don't know if it can be fixed. She is looking into getting a new car and thinks it will be early next week, way before we are going.

I messaged to ask if she is still ok to drive (because I'll offer if not) and she hasn't replied. She has seen it and was even having a group conversation with a load of us at the same time but not bothered to reply to my message.

This is fairly typical tbh. It pisses me off. If someone else needs to drive then that's fine but I do need to make arrangements to do it. Even a "not sure right now, I'll let you know by x" type thing would be polite. You can't even use the excuse that they haven't seen it!

AIBU to think this is rude?

[kumamon]

Texting stresses me out. If someone wants to arrange something I'd far rather sort it out in a quick phone call then texting back and forth.

If you need to know now - why not phone her to check? But also bear in mind that she probably hasn't got an answer until she knows what is happening with her car.

[adeucalione]

Well if she's stressed about the inconvenience and expense of her car breaking down, and worrying about getting to work and whatnot, a text asking 'are you still ok to drive?' would make me think 'fuck off'.

[Electriclaundryland]

Why ask a silly question when you and she both know she doesn't know the answer yet? I wouldn't reply either.

[PrimalLass]

Well if she's stressed about the inconvenience and expense of her car breaking down, and worrying about getting to work and whatnot, a text asking 'are you still ok to drive?' would make me think 'fuck off'.

Me too. I would think that you are being pointed, and that potentially you had been bitching behind my back about the inconvenience.

[MorphineDreams]

agent no I don't go round without asking, I'd ask them first if they're up for a chat. It would really annoy me if someone just came around unannounced, my friends are the same.

And no just because someone has a phone doesn't mean they have to be at your beck and call 24/7.

[Droflove]

Sometimes a response requires a few things to be checked in advance. Or its an awkward question I need to think about. Or its something I want to answer properly and want time and quiet to draft it.

I think YABU.

[Balaboosta]

I don't always answer straight away. You sound controlling.