To think my new colleagues are being very childish

[Elise101]

I started a new job a month ago and in the company I work for, they often use people's initials to refer to them in bulletins, emails and meetings etc. My initials are RC and this has been the butt of everyone's joke constantly. The first time I could understand as it is quite funny due to it sounding like 'arsey'. But literally every day someone makes a comment or starts laughing in my face about it.

AIBU to think this is rude and childish? I'm talking about a range of people, most of them over 35. I didn't mind the first time but I'm getting sick of it and it's making me feel irritated now, as it's not like I can change my name. Nobody in my life has ever said anything until now. My boss is now suggesting I use my middle name initial as RC isn't appropriate!!

I like tethers suggestion

On a serious note this could be seen as harrassment. It is certainly inappropriate.
Email your boss stating that you are not happy, quote the bullying and harassment policy and cc hr. Print a copy for future reference.
Every time someone says it email your boss and cc hr keeping a copy.

The only downside is you dont have full employment rights for 2years so you may have to suck it up for 2years until you do.
Just email every few months for now.

I had this OP my nickname begins with B and my married surname started with O! It was remarked upon so I told them if they used initials could they use my proper first name which made my initials different. Problem solved. Do you have a nickname you could use for your first initial? Although I fully understand that you shouldn't have to do it.

'There is a reason my initials spell RC. If you don't want to find out why then I suggest you STFU."

YES!!!

Oh for gawd's sake don't go to HR and start talking about harassment - far, far better to send the 'STFU' email otherwise you will have more more problems than a bit of banter about your name.

My initials were RC before I got married. I remember getting teased (a little) when I was 5. Never once since. This is ridiculous and v v immature.

My mum's work used initials but included middle names. If you didn't have a middle name you got X to distinguish you. RXC, for example.

I would consider looking for another job if I were you. You won't change them and you risk looking like you are 'difficult'. i have worked in quite immature environments and it isn't for everyone.

Tell your boss that if he doesn't deal with it you'll be making a formal bullying and harassment complaint under the company's policy. Start documenting every incident if you haven't already.

It's not up to you to find a solution to problem you didn't cause.

And YY to not going to HR!

backbystealth attitudes like yours are the reason why harassment often goes unchecked, I'm afraid.

And Anarchy99 you too.

Have you asked them not to? They might be wrongly thinking you're okay with it and in on the joke. I agree it could be harassment, but please start with asking them, and then ask your manager to try and handle it before going the HR route.

I have never harassed anyone in my life - I just see the difference between genuine harassment and this situation .

I think you should complain tbh. It's unprofessional.

Agreed EBearhug

Informal approach first, then boss... but formal complaint if these don't work.

Where did I suggest you'd harassed anyone Anarchy99?

In my work world RC stands for Responsible Clinician, and is an acronym we use every day, many times. I can't recall anyone ever making any kind of about that, I can't believe adults are so childish!

any kind of joke, that should say!

my responses in a different situation, but one I wanted stopped:

"Please don't" with a raised brow...
rolled eyes...
the stare....
"oh I haven't heard that one",
or just open a notebook write down the date/time then put it down and pat it.

when I was "no fun", it stopped.

It is a little silly but maybe it is because you are new and they have not got used to the novelty of it. After a while, the joke would surely get stale.

If it is still happening after 6 months, then I would really question their intelligence.

Attitudes like that are why harassment goes unchecked.

They are joking, OP doesn't like it - that's her right but she won't change them. They are not being racist, sexist, disablist etc - she just doesn't like their sense of humour.

I didn't say they were contravening the Equality Act. They are repeatedly making fun of her. That's harassment.

And she needs to go through the process EBearhug suggested.

To say "She won't change them" is simply letting that behaviour go unchallenged.

Would you have the same attitude if other children repeatedly mocked your child's name at school?

Please please don't let your boss make you change it to 'EC' - "easy" - could be an elaborate ploy by your boss to get more 'jokes' out of you. I've worked in immature (male only except for me) environments before where they would have LOVED my 'nickname' to go from arsey to easy.

Do start keeping a log of all incidences. Whatever you do later, you will be in a much stronger position if you have a contemporaneously recorded list of every time a comment was made. If you don't make a formal complaint, you will still be amazed at the difference a log makes to how you deal with it - just because you can look at it, know you're not going mental imagining it, and congratulate yourself on your strength in putting up with it (if that's what you end up doing).

WTF, these are adults???

I would say to the boss that you are unhappy and it has to stop. I think the most appropriate way is for him to have a chat to line managers that it has to be filtered down to everyone that it is inappropriate and that any further reference to this whole situation has to be reported directly to him.

I don't think EC is appropriate because it doesn't represent the name you are known by. If they want to include your middle initial to make REC then EVERYONEs initials must change rather than you being singled out.