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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to think thats schools should not give free trips away for 100% attendance

96 replies

RosesandRugby · 18/07/2014 15:00

Just cross really that my DS was off school following an accident at school where he lost several days off due to concussion. Before this he had always had 100% attendance (4 whole years) and they previously just gave out certificates at the end of term with a badge. This year the school have paid for a day trip (theme park) complete with meal out for those with 100% attendance but they wont be able to do it next year because it was only due to a large donation by a local business that has allowed them to do it this time.

OK so im cross that my child has missed out Envy but still, a day trip ! And before anyone goes on about rewarding good attendance etc as an adult you would just get paid your normal salary which would be reduced if you took time off......you wouldn't get extra for turning up to work 100% of the time !

stomps off to hide somewhere cool

OP posts:
TheFairyCaravan · 18/07/2014 21:12

YANBU!

I didn't take it with good grace that DS2 was threatened with not being able to go to his Prom due to his attendance. He has severe asthma and had received a severe injury at school.

I went to the EHRC who told me that by law they have to take reasonable adjustments to include all DC with medical conditions, SNs and disabilities in these awards. The adjustment in this case is having 2 registers and discounting all absences relating to their medical condition/SN/disability. The school didn't want to back down, even with the information from the EHRC, but as soon as the EHRC contacted them they did! Had they not have I would have gone for disability discrimination.

PossumPoo · 18/07/2014 21:13

Worried Ken that you are comparing chronic illness with those that arent sporty Hmm

SevenZarkSeven · 18/07/2014 21:16

KenDodd well yes it is true that children with chronic health conditions / disabilities / general poor health are going to have a shittier time in life on the whole than people who don't have those things. So best to teach them to deal with disappointment due to their conditions sooner rather than later. It's not something you can say "if you try harder you'll get better" like anything else at school so what's the lesson. A pretty nasty one really.

But yes maybe it is a pragmatic lesson when people with disabilities are discriminated against etc? I don't know whether it's better to be taught "put up and shut up" or to "fight" - the latter leads to passivity and can mean people get trampled on, the second can as you say lead to never-ending disappointment when you try and try but actually it's never going to go your way because society isn't like that.

It's a difficult one, and I can see your point.

I don't think you've changed my mind though.

SevenZarkSeven · 18/07/2014 21:19

Oh this "I don't think this means the children who are good at those things shouldn't get prizes given that much of the reason they are good might just be down to the fact they're tall. " YY you could give out certificates for being tall, which would kind of make sense, taller people statistically do better than short people (honestly!) so it wouldn't be that weird.

I suppose you could give out certs for being:

non disabled
white
male
straight
etc etc

and it would make just as much sense!

Gileswithachainsaw · 18/07/2014 21:46

There is something ALL children can be awarded for.

Attendance is a cop out.

If they aren't academic or sporty

They could for instance get an award for- being kind, trying hard, being a good friend, being helpful, taking good care of class pet, knowing the most about spiders etc

WannabeMrsJoshHomme · 18/07/2014 21:49

I don't believe 100% attendance should be awarded anyway! it's completely out of a child/parent's control should the child get ill. Ridiculous.

WannabeMrsJoshHomme · 18/07/2014 21:50

I think I meant 'rewarded' but I'm not sure...

BobPatandIgglePiggle · 18/07/2014 22:06

I'm with Ken and Pleb - maybe it's the only thing some kids get acknowledged for. I have a (16 + with additional needs) student who is always in. He's never going to get an award for high achievement in maths or English, or voted funniest student / win on sports day.

We acknowledged his attendance and he was chuffed.

cardibach · 18/07/2014 22:09

I was thinking about this in our school's celebration assembly today. Many of the pupils who were awarded wouldn't have got other awards, and most of those who did had come in to school with minor, non-infectious, illnesses throughout the year. I understand that there are pupils whose disabilities make 100% attendance unlikely but, as a teacher of 25 years, I'm not sure there are enough to make rewarding those who manage it a discrimination issue.

spiderlight · 18/07/2014 22:25

I think they should at least take into account why a child is off. My son was at school today with six stitches in his head, having missed out on his 100% attendance award because I kept him home on Tuesday after being at A&E until nearly midnight on Monday following a head injury. It was his only absence this term and one of only two days all year (the other being because of their rules on vomiting). This year he wasn't bothered, but last year the 100% attendance kids got to watch a special show and he would have been gutted to have missed out.

sanfairyanne · 18/07/2014 22:26

it is a discrimination issue

full stop end of

not for the op's child, at least according to info given, but if the absences are due to chronic conditions or disability, they should be discounted

SelfconfessedSpoonyFucker · 18/07/2014 22:53

Oh Cedric, you are going to miss your special whatever-it-is because you are vomitting, better send you in. Let's hope you don't throw up at school.

MuddlingMackem · 18/07/2014 23:20

I think that generally YABU, but YANBU about your specific case. Rewards for the children shouldn't end up costing the parents money.

Our school have done trips to a pantomime for full attendance in the autumn term, and this year did a day trip to York during the summer term for full attendance up to that point. This was the first time both of my kids have qualified for the attendance treat.

When my DS was in reception, the bar was set at about 96% attendance and has gradually crept up as attendance has improved. This year's was 100% attendance and no lates, as attendance has improved immensely, but the school are still having problems with children arriving late too often.

Having seen how things have improved it's an approach which does seem to be working at our school at least.

MuddlingMackem · 18/07/2014 23:23

Oh, and my children are philosophical about missing the treat if they're ill. They accept that not getting ill is just down to luck.

It was a bit rough though on DD the year she missed out because she got a vomiting bug midweek and missed two days of school, but DS came down with it on the Friday night at the beginning of half term, so managed 100% attendance and got to go on the attendance treat.

treaclesoda · 18/07/2014 23:28

I think it's horrible. And I'm the parent of a child who is ridiculously healthy, thank goodness, and had 100% attendance this year. But I hate the idea that is constantly peddled by these things (and employers too) that being ill is some sort of a choice, and if you just choose not to be ill you too have the award.

Heels99 · 18/07/2014 23:28

Have you raised it with the HT or governors?

cardibach · 19/07/2014 09:00

I can see the problems with rewarding attendance, but if schools stop doing this, how would you suggest they encourage attendance among those pupils who convince their parents they need days off when they don't really? There is a strong proven link between attendance and attainment.

Trapper · 19/07/2014 09:00

What a waste of money that would be better spent on books/ technology/ teachers/ buildings.

Gileswithachainsaw · 19/07/2014 09:01

Perhaps by dealing with the reason the kids don't want to go to school?

Trapper · 19/07/2014 09:02

Why don't you write to the business who donated the money and let them know how it is being spent and how children are being discriminated against?

Icimoi · 19/07/2014 09:12

I have one ds who is in all the time, 100%. Another with asthma who is not. I accept the attendence letters with good grace, and he accepts that attendance is not his "thing". He gets recognised in other ways

But why do either of you accept it? Why on earth should you be harassed because he isn't in school, and why should he accept that he is in effect being blamed because of his illness? How would you feel if in fact he wasn't recognised in other ways?

Sixweekstowait · 19/07/2014 09:17

Trapper - brilliant idea! Fairy - what an example you are teaching your ds to fight the bastards rather than learning to put up with life's little appalling treatment of disabled children/ people. OP - I hope you will keep your dc at home whilst this trip happens.

Icimoi · 19/07/2014 09:21

I understand that there are pupils whose disabilities make 100% attendance unlikely but, as a teacher of 25 years, I'm not sure there are enough to make rewarding those who manage it a discrimination issue.

cardibach, if there was only one disabled pupil, that would be more than sufficient to make it discrimination. By setting up an award that excludes that pupil from the outset, you are effectively punishing him for his disability. Would you, for instance, promise a reward to children who recited a poem out loud and refuse to give it to the child with a dreadful stammer? Would you tell a class that anyone who refuses to stand up will be punished, and then punish a child in a wheelchair?

sashh · 19/07/2014 10:32

Surely if you are going to give certs for attendance then each child should have a personal target and if they achieve that then they should get their cert/reward.

SevenZarkSeven · 19/07/2014 10:39

It's kind of like this.

Say you have a child with a condition or disability. Doesn't even need to be anything major. Take one of my children, say, who has a squint. Could be hearing issue, could be speech issue, any of that sort of thing that is very common. That in the average class, there will be some children who have it.

So you have this thing. And it means things like:

  • Time out of school for appts when you would rather be at school, maybe missing PE or a special assembly or golden time or playtime whatever else it is that the child enjoys
  • Unpleasant /painful tests. For many conditions children have to do stuff that is invasive / unpleasant. For eg the squint, DD has to have drops in her eyes that sting like a total bastard. She hates it
  • Ongoing invasive / unpleasant / uncomfortable treatments. Patches, braces on limbs, medications, exercises that are boring and painful, the list is endless and of course varies for things but you know the sort of stuff
  • Surgery which is just nasty and obviously the vast vast majority of children would far rather be in school than in a hospital having some level of pain inflicted on them

So all in all, a pretty crap time. And then you are told that because you haven't been at school (because you've been doing all this stuff that you would rather not be doing thank you very much, and which acts as a reminder that you are not the same as the other children etc) you have failed at something.

It just seems like adding insult to injury to me, it really does.

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