To think a hair free bikini line isn't more important than my own family?

[youmademesolate]

I am a care assistant.

There's never enough time to do everything. Today I was due to finish at 11 o clock and then had a special family event I wanted to go to (nothing formal) at 12.

The last lady was duly washed, dressed, bed changed, breakfast made, lounge cleaned (she is unable to walk herself so all this done using hoists and so on.) she asked me to put hair removal cream on her bikini line and I explained, politely, we just didn't have the time it would take to set and then remove the hair.

The husband has complained to the agency about me

I'm so fed up; why should I work for nothing at all, miss my own family doing things and for someone's bikini line???

[Mybigfatredwedding]

I am astonished that you have posted this. Unless you have changed loads of details here it is a really identifiable post. It certainly is NOT anonymous.

Where I work, moaning about work on social networking is a huge no no.

[Monmouth]

YANBU

I think it is ridiculous that the husband has complained.

You have an extremely limited amount of time to attend to this woman's needs, it is unlikely that you would ever have enough time to do this, even if you were inclined to.

[OwlCapone]

Unless you have changed loads of details here it is a really identifiable post. It certainly is NOT anonymous.

Really? Please tell me how this identifies the client as being, say, Josephine Bloggs of 73 Arkwright Crescent, Barnstaple?

[Monmouth]

Yeah, I know her. Very hirsute woman Mrs Bloggs.

[magpiegin]

Although I agree that OP has not posted names/ places etc it is of course identifiable to colleagues and family members. That is not professional. If you are in a position of trust, like a carer it is not acceptable or allowed.

You are allowed to moan about work, but working in health and social care you have to ensure that what is written on social media is none identifiable and to people close to the situation it might be.

[awsomer]

YANBU

You said the husband complained to the agency but you didn't say how the agency responded to him or what they said to you? We're they supportive of you?

[Mybigfatredwedding]

I'm not talking about the bikini line lady being identified, I'm talking about the OP being identified. Yes it's unlikely that anyone involved in this is reading (eg. Colleagues, someone from the agency, family members of the client) but why risk it?

[awsomer]

were*
Phone grrr!

[LongTimeLurking]

I don't see how this breaches confidentiality at all - there is no personally identifying information here at all. We don't even know what country or location the OP is from.

[MrsBoldon]

There is nothing in this post that is identifiable and it is not breaching confidentiality. We have no idea if the poster is even in this country let alone any clue whatsoever about the person she's talking about.

[LongTimeLurking]

It doesn't matter if the OP is identified - nobody could identify the client so what is the issue?

[OnesEnough]

Some people really do take the piss.
I wouldn't go anywhere near her fango even if I had lots of time.
Take my hat off to you for being a carer.

[magpiegin]

If the client told her daughter, sister, friend about the incident this morning where a carer couldn't/ wouldn't do this specific task so her husband complained to the agency then went on mumsnet and read this- don't you think they would put two and two together?

[LongTimeLurking]

magpiegin
So if the client had already told someone all about it, in great detail, they would be able to identify the OP?

It still wouldn't be a breach of the client's privacy.

[Proclean]

I think the agency should draw up a service list of items which can and should be expected during the service and items which are completely at the carers discretion and only to be undertaken as a kindness, if at all.

It is nice for the elderley to be pampered but should not be EXPECTED so that a carer could actually be called out for not including it in the basic care package.

Boundaries need to be defined here IMO.

YANBU!

[Mybigfatredwedding]

Because longtime for a lot of places now bitching online about work can result in disciplinary action.

If the OPs boss finds that they have discussed this incident in a public forum, either through a colleague or family member, the OP could be in trouble.

[Mybigfatredwedding]

And speaking in person about something is different to putting it on the Internet (as we are always being told at work) - once it's in writing o a public forum, its there, you can't claim you didn't say it/slightly change what you said etc. it's also seen by a hell of a lot more people than moaning about it in person to your mate is.

[LongTimeLurking]

Mybigfatredwedding
We are not talking about the OP though, we were talking about the client's confidentiality.

[Mrsjayy]

I feel sorry for the woman not the op fault though she has her half hour I think the husband was taking the pss tbh but maybe he is just frustrated that his wife has to ask then be told no I cant it must humiliating to be treated like you are being a burden when all she wanted was a tidy up I think these care agencies forget they are dealing with humans, op what will the agency do ?

[MrsBoldon]

They might put it together but that is extremely unlikely and even if they did; there is nothing in this post that breaches the NHS confidentiality policy from 2013. 'Person-identifiable information is anything that contains the means to identify a person - name, address,post code, DOB, NHS number'.

This isn't a post about a one in a million occurence like a rare disorder or rare event that could be identified even without personal information.

The OP said nothing to suggest she was a risk to her S.U and said nothing offensive so it's not a safeguarding or 'character issue' either.

[Marylou2]

Good god YANBU.I am a nurse and I wouldn't dream of tackling someone's bikini line.

[OnesEnough]

For very obvious reasons there are beauticians, manicurists, hairdressers etc etc that do home visits for the elderly and housebound.

[magpiegin]

Longtime- I have not once mentioned privacy or confidentiality. I have spoken about professionalism. If you are in a position of trust you need to act professionally (it will be in OPs contract). This is not professional.

It is very different to saying something in person. If you tell a friend you will probably know they aren't the client's daughter, sister or friend but the OP has no idea who any of us are. I could be the client for all anyone knows.

[expatinscotland]

YANBU. But the pearl clutchers scolding you are.

[Bowlersarm]

YANBU, and I really don't think there is a breach of confidentiality.