Colleagues using disablist word instead of name, IABU to approach the manager?

[Piplin]

Have name changed.
Not wanting to be professionally offended, but I'm really cringing when a friend and colleague uses the word 'spacker' when referring to another colleague.
The other colleague knows about it and they are really good friends, socialise outside of work etc.
what is disturbing is that there is a girl at work who has a severely disabled child. She has heard them use this term and just shrugged it off, but has been inwardly upset by this. (She told me)
Should I go to the manager about them using this term? Or should I just leave it, safe in the knowledge that these people are just ignorant?

A bit of background info, these are senior members of staff, me and the other girl are not. The senior members of staff are friends with the manager also, so in all likelihood would get back to them what was said by whom.
I am confident that using this word is just a bit of banter between them and they are not intending to insult anyone, least of all the girl with the disabled child.
They are in all other respects nice people.

I do understand that you might not find it easy to stand up to older, more senior colleagues. The thing is here you are 100% in the right and they are 100% in the wrong.

If there is a real chance they could make life difficult for you is there anyone you could go to that is not in your department?

I'm thinking an email could be sent out to all employees saying that disablist language is unacceptable, or words to that effect?

Can you casually say something like 'a friend was telling me her DH was nearly sacked a couple of months ago for using 'spacker' in the workplace. I'd never really given it any thought before. We used it a lot when we were kids but you hardly ever hear it now. I'm just working on that report for you now. Did you say you wanted 2013 figures too?'

This may be enough to give them the hint that it's unacceptable and they are risking getting into trouble without them getting defensive in reaction to you 'getting on your high horse' (because you've 'admitted' you've not given it thought and you personally don't find it offensive).

Thank you Phantomnamechanger.

If you feel like they will make life difficult for you then try and speak to someone else.
Do you have a whistle blowing dept or a support service that you can call? I've had both in a few companies that I've worked for and you could call to them if you weren't comfortable in reporting to your line manager and they would either take the problem out of your hands and deal with it or advise you what to do.

I'm even more disgusted that they are at senior level. They should be showing a good example to others and at a bare minimum they should remain professional at work and not be going around using language that even school children know is unacceptable.

DH went to school with a boy called Spackman who adopted Spacker as his nickname and liked it - how did the term come about in this case? Was it an innocent nickname?

What if a colleague was called "Phuk", a friend of mine did have a client of that name, should they not be called by their name in case it gets offensive?

I work with a colleague who uses inappropriate terms. I call him on it every single time he does it. It's got to the point where he apologises to me after saying it - I have no doubt that it is beginning to sink in with him. The trouble is, he has explained to me that he is so used to saying these phrases, and was brought up doing so, that he had no idea they were offensive.

Of course, he is now in the position where he is using these phrases from an indefensible position - and I will be raising it formally if he continues.

Glad you found the ACAS link interesting, OP.

Could you raise the issue of discriminatory language with HR informally first, and ask for training on the Equality Act 2010? I don`t see how he/she could refuse. Then you or others could raise the particular issue later.

Your employer has a duty of care to their employees which includes respect and dignity at work, and keeping up with legislation. We had training on this very issue at my last workplace years ago. It`s very important.

There is a potential for the public to hear what they are saying, but they are usually very crafty and discreet.
they are crafty in the way they don't say it so the general public can hear

This alone shows that they very obviously know that it's an offensive word.

I work with people with learning disabilities and do workshops in schools and colleges. Part of it is discussing disabilist words used as insults and what they actually mean. The kids are always horrified they have used them when they find out there real meaning.
Maybe we should start doing it with adults as well

I think that's a very good point zzzzz
I've not heard the word before this thread, but regardless of where it sits on the 'words to be offended by' continuum, why are them name-calling one of their colleagues anything ?
That seems inappropriate, even if it were using a word that were less offensive to you and the other colleague.

I've never heard this word. Is it possible they don't know it's offensive (I'm not clear what it's referring to) I was 19 before I found out twat wasn't the same as twit.

Phaedra the OP has said a couple times they are careful to keep from saying it in front of the public, so they've got to have a pretty good idea that it's offensive.

Sorry I didn't answer yesterday, I was working.
Again it came up that this person was referring to her friend as spacker, I called her on it in front of everyone.
I said to her that she couldn't say that, and then asked if she realised that it was a hate work, and infact illegal to use it in referring to someone.
She said that it wasn't her that came up with the word but someone else, I said it didn't make it right, and he needed pulling up on it.
It went quiet and the conversation fizzled out, I don't know what else I could have said, hopefully that's put an end to it.

Well done OP. If you call them on it each and every time they do it, it will give others the courage to call them on it as well. And hopefully they will stop.

She said that it wasn't her that came up with the word but someone else

Really? that's not an acceptable answer from a grown woman.

Good on you for calling her on it. Hopefully now it'll make her think twice about using it in the future.

congrats op I would be amazed if it happened again. If it does go straight to HR.

Yay, go Piplin I hope you feel really proud of yourself. You should.

You taught an ignorant person a lesson today.

Brilliant, well done OP!

No def stop it, tell manager or speak to them first

I really hope she stops it now, I'm pleased I called her on it. If I hear this other person saying it I'll do the same to him too.
It really is unacceptable.
If she had tried to defend it further I think I would have said it's the equivalent to calling someone the N word, even if they are not. It's meant as a put down.
I'm all for fun and banter but there needs to be a line somewhere.
Thank you all for your encouragement, I think it gave me the push I needed to say something, and not be so passive.

I've never heard this word. What does it mean or relate to, please?

Derived from 'spastic', sometimes said with accompanying gurning facial expression. Used only by arseholes.

Happy - It comes from the word Spastic.
Back when I was young people used it as a derogatory term to anyone with any disability.
My dsis used to get called it and she was deaf.