to think there's nothing wrong with sharing a flat with two men?

[lettertoherms]

As a lone female? Not friends, but strangers. I'm looking for a new house/flat share for when my next uni term begins. I've previously been placed in student housing, but now I need to rent privately.

Very expensive area. Lots of students, lots of shared rooms to rent, actual private rooms are generally more expensive. I've noticed that houses with females tend to be priced higher. I found a private room in a house with two boys - ages 19 and 20.

Family don't want me to consider it, they don't feel it's safe. Would others consider it? Or do my family have it right, is this inviting risk?

I have a family member who was assaulted by a housemate when she shared with two men. He attacked her when it was just the two of them in the house.

But obviously in general you could live with men or women and not know how things will turn out. It couldn't hurt to meet them and get an idea of their personalities. If they leer at you or joke about having found their maid you know it won't work. (It might be an idea to linger outside for a minute if you can after the door closes, pretend you're looking for something in your bag, you know what you'd be listening out for.)

The ad wasn't clear. It wasn't a private room.

I'm not sharing a one bed with two anythings!

Well at least you now know to check whether they're Irish. We are thoroughly appalling.

letter that is terrible!
So what, it is a one bed place, they are already sharing it and they are advertising for someone else to pay to share it? That isn't legal, report them!

As a postgrad I shared with 3 male mature/postgrad students. Not sure if you 'd call them boys or men, but they were all 24-29 and pretty well behaved!

I shared with 3 guys at uni. Best houseshare I ever lived in. I knew one of them quite well before I moved in but not the other 2. I think all houseshares are a bit of a risk as you never actually know if you are about to share your home with complete dicks, gender is not the biggest issue.
There really was no boy/girl issue, cleaning was shared, etc. The only buggeration i can remember were the 3 festering sets of rugby kit in the hall on a Weds night. Mind you, they weren't over impressed with my knickers drying in the bathroom either.
And I ended up being best woman at one of their weddings about 10 years later.

Agree with the poster who said it's not whether they are male or female that's important, it's the kind of people they are. Which, if you are answering an ad as a stranger, will always have a teeny weeny risk - actually, even if you've met them socially, I suppose it's still different living together - but then, that risk is there for the people advertising too. You can't go through life never getting to know new people just in case they turn out to be evil.

I think I must be BU here, but what's the problem with men? It's a sad sign of the times if we are to assume all males are dodgy or pervs or something!
I had 3 flatshares while I was in uni... twice I was the only girl amongst guys, it was absolutely fine. In the other there one boy and one girl - the girl was the worst flatmate I ever had and made my life a misery.

at uni i shared a house with 4 guys, the loo was disgusting but apart from that they nagged me about the state i left the kitchen.

I did it, not a problem- and I'd certainly do it again!

I shared with 4 blokes (20 yr olds) when I was in my second year at uni. Two of them were messy but the other two were very clean and tidy. I was somewhere in between! Never had any problems at all, though I knew one of them (though not well) before I moved in.

I ended up having two children with one of them many years later, and am still friends with two of the others (fourth one moved abroad and lost touch).

And I have just realised that the house I lived in for a year after uni was me and three other men (two my age, one in early 30s and one in his late 40s). Funny, that didn't even occur to me until now! Again, no problems at all, in fact they were a great bunch and I still meet up with one of them socially. There were a few strange girls at breakfast but that didn't bother me too much. I think they were just relieved when I moved in, as the previous occupant of my room had moved out due to being sectioned for six months.

It's very sad that people automatically assume men are a risk to be around.

I shared in all sorts of combo's. Depends on the actual people involved.

I lived in a house share in London with (counting) at least five men and they were lovely and really good fun.

I shared a house with 6 other girls.
The next year, the same house was 1 other girl and 5 boys.
The landlord was very worried about the second year as he didn't normally let to boys.

Guess which year was easier and cleaner.
(hint: the landlord was pleasantly surprised)

Latest posters, read the OP's latest post. She's been to see it and it wasn't a private room it was a one bedroom place!
So no, doesnt matter if they are men or women, the op has passed up that fabulous opportunity!

oooh a one bed place!! (weird)

I rented with 3 unknown guys in London 10 years ago, they were all mates from uni, I didn't know any of them.

It was great, they were l charming and polite and totally refreshing considering the toxic 5 female household I had moved out from. When I moved in I was going through a tough time (fallout from toxic females) and was out A LOT. After about a fortnight I stumbled in and one if them was waiting up for me watching telly. He said very gently "we do want to get to know you, you know... you can come home sometimes"

They were lovely and although they all went there separate ways eventually I stayed another three years in the house, it was a very happy time and they treated me like a princess.

Apart from having to be prepared to lower your standards (likelihood is they won't be as tidy as girls!) I'd go for it. My best friend I met through random house sharing allocation.