AIBU to want to not have to clean the toilet before every use???

[LizzyBennet1813]

OK, possibly tmi here but this is something I find really irratating & when I bring it up with my partner he makes me feel like I'm being unreasonable so I would like your thoughts.

Whenever I want to use our toilet I have to clean it because he always leaves pee all over the seat and I'm not just talking a little drip here and there.
This morning I came down from using the loo & tried to not sound naggy and just jovially said, 'you really need to learn to aim' he sighed and said 'next time I go you can watch & you will see it has nothing to do with aim, sometimes it just changes direction, we can't control it' so I said 'fair enough but can you at least clean it up afterwards' he claimed he didn't notice anything to be wiped.
Similar conversations to this have occurred in the past.
Am I being unreasonable? do all woman have to put up with this? I know it's not a huge deal but its really annoying!!

it changes direction??! Really??!
Is that because he's trying to write his name perhaps??

if he can't control the flow he:

a) needs to sit down to wee
b) needs an app with the gp to check the prostrate
c) needs to clean up the mess he makes, inconsiderate fucker

thank you do much for your comments, glad to know I'm not alone.
there are some very funny/good ideas here that I will be putting into practice, love the padlock idea! might actually padlock both looks shut & he can go in the garden with the dog!!

Yuk, I wouldn't have remained in the same house as my husband if he wasn't house trained. If you're a bloke you crouch, kneel or even sit when weeing to avoid making a mess of toilets. Standing up is for urinals not toilets.

He needs to sit. I've trained my DH to sit, (and beg)

No not all women have to put up with this. DH actually wees sitting down at home so it's never an issue, but I also grew up with brothers & I don't recall there ever being piss all over the place. They were either aiming properly or cleaning up.

OP, if you have two toilets at home, can you designate them as his and hers and completely ignore the existence of his toilet? Leave him to it - never enter the room, or clean it, make it entirely his responsibility.

What does he think of sitting on a pissy seat when he has a shit?

YANBU! My four year old leaves piss on the floor and seat, DH does sometimes too. It's disgusting and yes it's always up to me to clean it up. I get my four year old to do it himself. DH will clean it up if I ask him but I have to tell him to clean, hand him cleaning equipment and accompany him to the bathroom and watch to make sure he actually does it. It makes me feel like a controlling twat so I'd rather just give it a quick wipe myself and silently seethe.
DH would happily use a toilet stinking and caked in shit and piss. He still wouldn't clean it. So I have come to accept that if I want a clean house then I must clean it. DH really does appear to be someone who'd be happy living in a shit tip.

My DH does this. Apparently it's mostly if he's got a morning erection, it makes aiming very, ahem, hard. D'ya see what I did there? . Anyway. I email him photos to work. Also of skid marks (toilet and pants) and other cleanliness misdemeanours. When he couldn't see the problem with the wee I pointed out that the baby touches everything, and unless he wanted to put piss in his own mouth, he needed to take steps to avoid the baby putting it in his. Great improvement.

That's the way to do it, bonzo!

The "morning sprinkler" can be dealt with by loosening the foreskin. I would suggest pulling it over his head.

Call him to wipe it up every time you need the loo!!

DH lifts the seat but does sometimes sit down to wee instead. I would not clean up after him; I would make him do it. TBH he would be horrified at leaving loo in a state.

disgrace DH has no foreskin. Just a veritable fountain

Get him a splash nozzle like you put on garden taps.

Dirty sod, I was cured of this sort of thing before I started primary school.

OMG. This is an ongoing battle in my house. Not with urine though. His life with me would be unbearable if that were the case. No, DH lifts the seat and wipes. I do get a faint smell of urine sometimes which makes me think there's some floor spray but I can never see it so say nothing. My problem is when he sits on his throne for his daily business, he only half flushes and leaves a dirty toilet with stained water - I know, definitely TMI!!!!!! If I could see the bottom I'm sure there would be skid marks! He claims he doesn't mean to do it, doesn't know he does it, and never looks down after flushing. We have a 'close the toilet lid' policy because of the pets. I have asked him so many times to check. I send him pictures if he is not home. And if he is I make him go look. He won't clean it though and neither will I. We have a cleaner twice a week who will. He says I am not normal!!!

Cannot believe you put up with this shit.

I would be tempted to post pictures of it on FB. Or maybe piss on his underpants and ask him how he likes the feel of someone else piss against his arse.

luggage can't believe your post. isn't going to the loo private?

mumyum Your DH sounds like mine! I had a big go at him a while ago for not flushing the toilet properly and leaving it full of shit. He told me I was making a fuss about nothing . I told him if I posted on mumsnet about it people would probably tell me to ltb. The situation has improved
OP I only have one toilet but if you have two I'd ban him from one and leave him to sit in his own piss.

DH doesn't 'see' mucky toilets. His idea of cleaning the toilet is squirting a bit of Harpic around the bowl and leaving it. It wouldn't occur to him that it needs scrubbing.

When I wash the loo properly, around the hinges etc, the smell of urine is very strong when the hot water makes contact. Urgh.

Its one of the main reasons I want a steam cleaner.

post it note on the wall behind the loo saying " if you sprinkle when you tinkle, please be sweet and wipe the seat!" works for my 6yr old ds..

I once saw some graffiti in a (unisex) public loo saying "Its not that big. stand closer or sit down like the little girl that you are" made me lol

Neither my DP or DS make this kind of mess, they are both very clean.

Your partner is being lazy, and by cleaning it up for him, you give him no incentive to change.

YANBU

although my ds does this. He's 4 and now has a phobia of lifting the seat aafter it fell and caught him one day ouch so will have to retrain him.

Orange, why has your dp never cleaned the toilet in a whole year of living together? I would never in a million years put up with that. DH said he didn't know how so I gave him a half an hour lesson-he won't be feigning ignorance ever again.

DH sits to wee. FIL & BIL so as well (apparently). It's one of the things I am thankful to MIL about.

stick a plastic fly on the rear wall of the loo just above the water line, he will aim at it to try and shift it... result (this was actually rsearched, called nudge theory )