Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to think the parents should have given up long before they did?

55 replies

edamsavestheday · 29/06/2014 22:38

Was at the hairdressers yesterday. Family bring in a small boy - maybe two-ish. He howled. And wriggled and jiggled and squirmed. They tried sitting him on Daddy's lap in the chair, but he was thrashing around and crying. They tried taking him outside for a few minutes, then brought him back in and tried on Mum's lap - even worse.

I heard the boss asking anxiously 'are you sure you want to carry on' but the parents insisted. Cue more protests and thrashing and howling. Whole thing went on for about 20 minutes before they gave up and left.

My stylist told me she was very relieved they'd gone as there was no way anyone could have gone near him without risking an injury to either party - or both.

ds was a nightmare about getting his hair cut at the same age, so I do sympathise, but if he'd been thrashing about in the chair, I'd have given up far sooner than this family. Dangerous and not a relaxing environment for other customers either.

If it was you, I do sympathise, seriously, and I hope he's better next time - but blimey, I'm so glad you gave in.

OP posts:
FiveFingerDeathPunch · 29/06/2014 22:40

did you cut yourself with your judgy pants?

TucsonGirl · 29/06/2014 22:41

Parents should do it with some clippers.

CoffeeTea103 · 29/06/2014 22:41

Yanbu, to put a child through that for 20 minutes is horrible, both to the child and for everyone else.

LaurieFairyCake · 29/06/2014 22:41

I don't think you sound particularly judgemental

Smelsa · 29/06/2014 22:42

Maybe the boss/stylist need to be a little more assertive rather than weeping in the corner and cheering when the family vanished. I made that bit up but god they sound wet.

Original poster
edamsavestheday · 29/06/2014 22:44

Fivefingers, no, because I wasn't wearing any - just felt sorry for everyone all round. Nasty situation, kid was genuinely upset. I've been there, trying to persist with something that ds was protesting about - used to have to pin him down to brush his teeth. But at least that was in private, not in the middle of a busy shop!

OP posts:
missbishi · 29/06/2014 22:45

yeah, what on earth is judgemental about this?

Original poster
edamsavestheday · 29/06/2014 22:45

Agree, I think the boss should have encouraged them to try again another day rather earlier in proceedings (if I were him, I'd have added 'in another salon'...).

My stylist didn't have any power to change things, no need to call her names.

OP posts:
daftbesom · 29/06/2014 22:46

YANBU - took me right back! but sometimes as a parent you lock on to the idea that you have to get the thing done and DC has to get used to it.

[Someone suggested to me feeding DS1 grapes one by one and that did the trick for us.]

I'm not sure either child would have accepted clippers from me at home!!! Only thing is, it does pass. Thank goodness.

BruthasTortoise · 29/06/2014 22:46

This is the reason my DSs had long hair until age 3 (which comes with it's on share of judgement, I'm sure). Not nice for anyone involved.

Original poster
edamsavestheday · 29/06/2014 22:46

sorry smelsa, you didn't call her names, I just extrapolated without checking.

OP posts:
3littlefrogs · 29/06/2014 22:46

Why does anybody take a two year old to the hairdressers???

I cut my sons' hair myself until they were at least 6.

Smelsa · 29/06/2014 22:47

They both sound a bit wet is name calling? What has happened to this place recently dear god!

fledermaus · 29/06/2014 22:48

Only 20 minutes? It's not like they were trying for hours, 20 minutes seems like a reasonable go to me.

hairylittlegoblin · 29/06/2014 22:48

Tricky. If a child freaks out about haircuts and you therefore never take them for a haircut how do you ever get over it? I agree that 20 minutes is excessive but I can see how you get to that point.

DS HATED having his hair cut. But when we got to the stage where he couldn't see from under his fringe I had to bite the bullet. We didn't have 20 minutes of screaming because I was quite firm and offered bribes but it wasn't fun for anyone. They have my sympathy.

Original poster
edamsavestheday · 29/06/2014 22:51

Smelsa, see my post after that, I retracted!

I used to have to drag ds into the hairdressers at that age, but he went quiet and behaved himself once inside, thank heavens. Then one day he realised to his horror the headmistress of his nursery (attached to a primary school) was in there having her hair done. He was soooo embarrassed she'd seen him making a fuss.

Bless her, she had a reputation for being very strict, but she promised him a treat if he behaved himself. At school on Monday he was called to her office and presented with a penguin biscuit. Grin

OP posts:
Lesshastemorespeed · 29/06/2014 22:52

When ds was little, he wouldn't let anyone go near him with scissors or clippers, and although I was happy to leave his bogbrush head hair, I couldn't get through 5 minutes of the day without someone commenting on it.

"Would he like a bobble?"
"He looks like a girl"
"Cut it when he's asleep" cos that'll make him look soooo much better
"It'll affect his eyesight"

And so I have done exactly the same as the couple you saw, obviously only making things worse in the long run.

Eventually I got the balls to tell everyone (strangers included) to do one, and left it. Ds has an unacceptable number of cow's licks, so you can imagine what he looked like.

He's 8 now and he goes the barbers.

ICanHearYou · 29/06/2014 22:53

I just do both of mine with the clippers

Ilovemydogandmydoglovesme · 29/06/2014 22:55

I sympathise. Sometimes you have to persevere with something if only to keep the upper hand and not give in to the tantrum. That did sound a bit extreme though.

Original poster
edamsavestheday · 29/06/2014 22:56

'Cut it when he's asleep'. Hah! I can see that one going soooo well.

I tried cutting ds's fringe once and made a complete mess of it. Dh came home and gave me A Look. Next bathtime, I thought, I'll just even it up, it can't be that hard... Good God, turns out it can. Cost me a tenner and a painfully embarrassed visit to the hairdressers to put it right!

OP posts:
Original poster
edamsavestheday · 29/06/2014 22:56

Yeah, I know, Ilovemydog, been there and got the T shirt - but sometimes you just are not going to win.

OP posts:
monkeymamma · 29/06/2014 22:59

Ds insists on keeping his 'middle hair' (mid length wild curls). But he refuses to let us wash or brush it so it's gone completely Russell brand. Think it was up to the parents here how long to try for.

gamerchick · 29/06/2014 23:00

The past 3 haircuts has my 7 yr old has not screamed. I had to pin him down and shave him with clippers. The noise he made you would have thought he was being murdered.

Age 2 would have meant injury to somebody. It's just not worth it.

MoJangled · 29/06/2014 23:02

My DS would have done exactly the same and I'd have had to cut his hair on stealth snips over a period of weeks. Fortunately there's a brilliant kids hairdressers near me, with airplane and car seats with DVDs of cartoons in front of each place. Now he actively campaigns to go Smile

Stratter5 · 29/06/2014 23:09

I used to bribe mine with a Disney film and a bag of chocolate buttons.