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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to think the parents should have given up long before they did?

55 replies

edamsavestheday · 29/06/2014 22:38

Was at the hairdressers yesterday. Family bring in a small boy - maybe two-ish. He howled. And wriggled and jiggled and squirmed. They tried sitting him on Daddy's lap in the chair, but he was thrashing around and crying. They tried taking him outside for a few minutes, then brought him back in and tried on Mum's lap - even worse.

I heard the boss asking anxiously 'are you sure you want to carry on' but the parents insisted. Cue more protests and thrashing and howling. Whole thing went on for about 20 minutes before they gave up and left.

My stylist told me she was very relieved they'd gone as there was no way anyone could have gone near him without risking an injury to either party - or both.

ds was a nightmare about getting his hair cut at the same age, so I do sympathise, but if he'd been thrashing about in the chair, I'd have given up far sooner than this family. Dangerous and not a relaxing environment for other customers either.

If it was you, I do sympathise, seriously, and I hope he's better next time - but blimey, I'm so glad you gave in.

OP posts:
DisgraceToTheYChromosome · 29/06/2014 23:17

DD was a thrasher until she was 3, then she asked out of the blue to go. We took her, she got a lovely Louise Brooks ("bit shorter please, lady") and then pestered us on a weekly basis for more.

No idea what changed.

Ilovemydogandmydoglovesme · 29/06/2014 23:34

My two have been coming to my hairdressers with me since they were babies. They love having their hair cut now.

TyneTeas · 29/06/2014 23:41

Never used it, but there is a salon near me set up for kids so there must be a market

www.thesalonforkids.co.uk/

ThatVikRinA22 · 29/06/2014 23:46

my ds has AS and it actually "hurts" him to have his hair cut - but he needs it dong - i do it now with clippers - he is 22!

but i remember the hairdresser ordeal sooooo well.

i used to have to sit him on my lap and literally wrap my arms around him and just get the hair dresser to do the fastest hair cut in the west....he would scream and cry and thrash about too.

in future i will use your judgy pants to cut his hair as they are so fast....and very cutting.
why i never thought of that in the first place ill never know....

nicename · 29/06/2014 23:54

Luckily DS had huge curls, so it was easy to grab a handful and hack them off and it looked fine. He didn't mind but never sat still for more than 2 seconds.

familygermsareok · 29/06/2014 23:55

DS1 ended up with half a haircut once when he kicked off mid-cut. Impossible to complete the job. He looked bloody ridiculous for a couple of weeks till I could get him back. On the plus side I've got some great photos to embarrass him with at his future wedding Wink

I also once tried to cut his hair myself, the mess I made of it was worse than the half cut, at least he looked ok from some angles with that Grin

Picturesinthefirelight · 30/06/2014 00:04

I would have persevered for longer. But ds was very small for his age so I was able to pin him down effectively.

LittleBearPad · 30/06/2014 00:08

Dd has her haircut in a children's shop, sells toys, clothes, shoes etc. They have peppa pig on a portable DVD player where they cut hair. It works like a charm. She's mesmerised and doesn't really notice her hair us being cut.

steff13 · 30/06/2014 00:16

My daughter goes to a kids' salon. All the seats are cars, and they can watch cartoons and there's a jungle gym inside the waiting area.

BlackeyedSusan · 30/06/2014 01:03

I cut ds's hair while he was latched on and breastfeeding. I had to deal with the resulting mullet when he was asleep. Grin

putting him in a high chair and letting him watch grandads big tv worked a few times.

PopcornFrenzy · 30/06/2014 01:19

I've been having DS' hair cut since he was a year old, he had a thick black mane of hair that needed it he hated going and would only sit nicely if he sat on my lap and the lady only used scissors, now he's 4 and loves going.

The salon we go to has a tractor chair and cebeebies on the iPad, the lady takes a few minutes and has a lollipop on hand for when she's finished, it costs a fiver and has to be done every 6 weeks.

Sometimes it just takes perseverance to get your dc s hair cut and no doubt the parents felt awful for putting their child through it.

fifi669 · 30/06/2014 02:43

My sister is a hairdresser, she comes to mine, on goes the disney, some sort of bribery used to be offered during the cut now it's if he behaves he gets it after and bobs your uncle :) I normally get mine cut too do that eases his anxiety as he seems to think it will hurt.

Mobile hairdressers and chocolate!

DrFunkesFamilyBandSolution · 30/06/2014 03:27

Not looking forward to the day wetake ds1 in!

Dh hates him having long hair (he's 2&a half), I've always said 'well you cut it/take him to the barbers then'. Same with pil/anyone else anti long hair Grin

FixItUpChappie · 30/06/2014 03:57

20 min doesn't sound excessive to me. They took him out for a break in that time before giving it another go...meh, I don't see the big deal. They tried, it didn't work out, they left.

Andanotherthing123 · 30/06/2014 06:41

vicarInaTuta same here-DS is 4 with asd.we tried specialist hairdressers, clippers at home, sweets, toys, moon on a stick...

he scream, hits and pleads with us not to do it. It feels totally, totally destroying for me, DH and DS. If his hair didn't grow straight and thick, right into his eyes I'd just let it grow long.

Idontseeanyicegiants · 30/06/2014 07:59

DS used to be the same and we did cut it when he was asleep until he was about 5!
I'd do one side then till him over and do the other, it wasn't the best cut in the world but he has thick curly hair if it's left and he would get very hot if it was left.
YANBU mostly, it can be awful when your child is having a full blown panic like that and sometimes you really don't know what to do for the best but giving up isn't always the easiest option. They probably should have realised it wasn't going to work sooner.
Hopefully the child will grow out if it.

pluCaChange · 30/06/2014 09:33

It's the mirror which has always freaked DS out. He's now 6, and DH does it at home with clippers.

However, I haven't even tried to take DD to a salon, because I just can't be bothered with the procedure even with a happy child.

pluCaChange · 30/06/2014 09:33

Sirry

pluCaChange · 30/06/2014 09:35

I meant to add (to make the tales of my DCs' tresses relevant Wink) that lots of parents do it at home, even when there's no tantrum/anxiety/phobia making them do so.

Mrsjayy · 30/06/2014 09:38

The hairdresser we went when dds were younger wouldnot cut screaming kids hair she would try and calm them down if not she sent them away, poor kid a haircut isnt that important

CrystalSkulls · 30/06/2014 09:44

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

ArcheryAnnie · 30/06/2014 09:48

Mind you, I have seen a kid at Trotters get a very good haircut whilst completely asleep. It was very odd to see this little sleeping face emerge from under a mass of hair as it was all snipped off.

SirChenjin · 30/06/2014 09:53

That takes me back Sad

DS1 has the thickest hair imaginable, and even at 2 it was a thicket - there is no way I could have cut it at home, although I did try. I used to take him to the hairdressers, sit with him on my lap, wrap my arms around him and feed him buttons as the hairdresser cut his hair as quickly as she could. It was horrible - and I was fully aware that everyone was tutting at me. I hadn't long moved to the area (a new housing estate), the internet was only just starting and we didn't have a computer - so no mobile hairdressers I could find.

I remember one trip in particular - he threw the biggest tantrum a few minutes into the haircut. We had to persevere, and I apologised profusely at the end (in tears), saying that he had only just turned 2 and was going through a difficult stage - the hairdresser said "only 2? I thought he was much older, but that he had special needs".

Not a good time - he was a very challenging little boy, still has his moments tbh, despite various interventions over the years Sad

Pobblewhohasnotoes · 30/06/2014 10:12

DS is 2 and hates having his haircut. We've had a couple of similar episodes where he screams and has to be held, it's horrible but it gets the job done and his hair grows so fast!

We've been to children's salons a couple of times where he can sit in a car and watch a DVD. He hates the clippers so that's a no go.

We've worked out now that if he sits on DH and watches Peppa Pig then it's ok.

I do think that going to someone who is good with children can make a big difference. At times!

Lizzylivi81 · 30/06/2014 10:13

My ds has very thick hair that grows into his eyes. Last hair cut he screamed the entire way through and I had to restrain him whole the poor hairdresser cut his hair. I have to take him back in the next few days as he is way too hot with all that hair. Really looking forward to it now I've read this thread Hmm Confused
Like the grapes/buttons ideas will give them a bash if he stops thrashing long enough to notice!! Hmm

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