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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be scared to start over at 31?

30 replies

kirsten123 · 27/06/2014 16:29

Hi everyone,

Sorry, I know this is not really AIBU but doesn't fit in any other forum!

I moved from Scotland to England when I got engaged in a long distance, whirlwind romance. Was fed up with my job up there and managed to rent out my flat to some friends. I got a job down here.
Predictably, the relationship didn't survive real life for more than a year (no DCs) and I've moved into a rented room here to finish the work contract. But my question is what now? Do I stay here because the work opportunities are probably better (SE England) or go back, live with my parents (!!!) til I get a job back home and then move back into my own flat? Or do I jack it all in and go travelling. I'd really like to do a job I don't hate (or even one I love!). I trust the tenants in my flat so in some ways this is the best opportunity I have - once I boot them out, I'll be loathe to rent it out again to people I don't know.
Should say contract won't be renewed and renting a room is a bit shit, obviously.

Any thoughts are most welcome!
Good luck to everyone else! Thanks!!

OP posts:
Happydaysatlast · 27/06/2014 16:33

Oh jack it in and go travelling. What have you got to loose op. Enjoy.

wildfig · 27/06/2014 16:38

If you've got the urge to go travelling, go travelling - it won't be as easy again, and in five years' time you won't have that nagging voice in the back of your head going, 'Oooh, you could have backpacked across Australia'. You could give yourself a limited time to go, then come back and address the job hunting then; there isn't going to be a massive gap in your CV if you're only away for six months.

also, it'd bring something good out of what's probably been quite a crap time. Celebrate your freedom!

Xenadog · 27/06/2014 16:41

At 31 you have bags of time to have a proper, serious, grown up life. Go and travel.

SquirrelledAway · 27/06/2014 17:52

No brainer.

Travelling.

Wish I had done it - can I live my life vicariously through you?

notaflamingclue · 27/06/2014 18:04

I started again aged 34. Left my home of 7 years to come home to Wales. Met OH at 35, had DD at 39. You have BAGS of time so buy a plane ticket to the first place that comes into your head!

londonrach · 27/06/2014 18:05

31 so young...loads of time

MoreBeta · 27/06/2014 18:13

Sell the flat. Go and travel. Learn a language. Pick up some skills on the way. Honestly, you never know what stuff life will throw at you.

When I was 30 I fell ill and have been for over 20 years now. Before that I thought I had all the time in the world and that I could conquer the world.

I wish I had done more when I was young. I did some things - not enough.

TiredFeet · 27/06/2014 18:13

Go travelling! You say you were fed up with your job anyway. Do some travelling and some thinking and hopefully you will have all sorts of adventures and come home with a clearer idea what you want to do nextSmile

shockinglybadteacher · 27/06/2014 18:18

At 31? It's hardly 101 is it, seriously. Or even 51.

Do whatever the fuck you like and enjoy yourself! :)

stonecircle · 27/06/2014 18:20

You're a baby! GO FOR IT! You know what they say - when you're old and look back on your life, it's not the things you did that you regret - it's the things you DIDN'T do.

teaandthorazine · 27/06/2014 18:22

31 is NOTHING - go, go, go!

You know that trite bit of crap about you only regret the things you haven't done? Well, it is trite and and it is crap but it's also true.

Do it, go. Otherwise you will turn around in twenty years time and think, bugger, I wish I'd bloody done that.

tygarugby · 27/06/2014 18:22

Go travelling, no contest and enjoy,

ICanSeeTheSun · 27/06/2014 18:26

Go traveling, before you meet someone and settle down with DC and commitments but there again you may never want DC

screamingeels · 27/06/2014 18:52

I did this at 31! I went travelling for a year and it was fab. I came back and started over in new town, new career. Now 12 years on, I have senior role at work, DH and 2 DC. So it's definitely do-able.

mathanxiety · 27/06/2014 19:04

If you leave it another year you'll be 32... and so on..

Do it now.

CarolineWheatley · 27/06/2014 19:08

Go travelling. It'll be fun and will give you the head space to decide where to go back to, without trying.

beccajoh · 27/06/2014 19:11

Go travelling!

McFlickle · 27/06/2014 19:13

Was told by exdp spitefully 'you'll never start again now' (no dc) but I did, I started again at 33 moved abroad, well paid contract work, and travel. Married at 36, baby at 41. Do it!

DamsonJam · 27/06/2014 19:15

Go travelling! I went travelling at the age of 31 and it was one of the best years I've ever had. I'm so glad I did it before DC. In years to come you'll realise 31 is not old at all.

aquashiv · 27/06/2014 19:17

Go have an adventure live life be free ha ha do I sound like an advert for tampons?

ICanHearYou · 27/06/2014 19:18

Go travelling!

HolgerDanske · 27/06/2014 19:19

Don't sell the flat. Do go travelling! Smile

Mumzy · 27/06/2014 19:24

I was in a similar position at 31 and decided to go travelling for a year One of the best decisions I've ever made, by 37 I was married, had 3 dcs and continued with my career. 15 years later I still look at my travelling photos and relive those memories of the places I visited and the people I met. It was truly life changing and best done when you have little responsibility and footloose/fancy free.
Continue to rent out your flat so you have a place to come back to. I promise you will have grown as a person after your travelling experience

MrsWinnibago · 27/06/2014 19:26

Off you go! Grin young, free, single...no responsibilities! See the frigging world and think of us when you're meeting beautiful people and watching beautiful sunsets.

Oh...and write a blog all about it.x

Original poster
kirsten123 · 27/06/2014 19:36

Wow! I think that's unanimous for go travelling!
Thanks for all the encouragement etc - yes, maybe I can get MN to sponsor a blog so you can live vicariously!
:-)

OP posts: