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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to think if your first office job is in your 30s its too hard to adjust

341 replies

spegal · 23/06/2014 12:43

Hi,

I've started an office job in my 30s, its been a month and still just finding it a miserable and boring existence. Such dull conversations and other people seam to delight in pointing out minor mistakes or picking arguments over little things. To be honest I really don't care about it all, I'm just like whatever its not like anyone is going to die if something isn't perfect.

I'm coming to the conclusion I'm just not an office 9-6 kind of person. Maybe if I had started in my 20s I could of coped. But now I've had such a great life not sat in offices it makes it so hard.

Am I being stuck up or does anyone see my point of view?

Might just stick it out till Xmas for the cash

OP posts:
redexpat · 23/06/2014 13:25

You seem to be getting a flaming. Yes offices can be dull. Not all offices are the same though. Is it the work that drains you or the people? My most fascinating job was in an office, inside 4 very large walls of one of Her Majesty's Prisons. Is your current position going to lead to anything?

As for your own ideas, well are there any evening courses in how to set up your own business near you? Starting your own business can be risky, so you need to do your preparation.

Just because other posters are in miserable offices doesn't mean that you have to be.

Summerbreezing · 23/06/2014 13:26

It sounds like you're in the wrong job but don't dismiss all 'office' jobs simply because this place doesn't suit you.
I've worked in some offices where the work was as dull as ditchwater and others where I was doing really interesting and challenging stuff. And I've had office co-workers who did my head in with their boring conversations, self importance, and lack of imagination; and others who were brilliant fun, really creative and interesting, and knew when not to take the job too seriously.

5Foot5 · 23/06/2014 13:28

well, even if you think the work is pointless you are being paid to do a job and should do it to the best of your ability, not take the attitude "if it's not perfect no one will die"

I agree with PetulaGordino 100%

Whatever you are doing I think it is important to do the best possibly job you can for a number of reasons, one of the most important being your own self esteem. If you can go home thinking "I did a really good job of that today" then you will feel better about yourself than if you just think "Yeah, did some shit, whatever"

Also I think it is possible that whatever you are doing, however trivial it may seem, you can always find an opportunity to learn something from it if you really look for it. It might not be obvious at first, but you could find you are developing a skill or a quality in yourself that has been neglected before. Think to yourself how you would talk up what you are currently doing in the best possible way if you were trying to sell yourself at an interview and see if that gives any clues.

And last but not least you should always try to get the good opinion of everyone you work with. Not just your managers or even just your peers, but everyone. You never know when you will encounter them again in a professional situation. It might be 5 years or even 10 but one day that office junior might be on the other side of the desk interviewing you for a completely different role. You don't want her to remember you as that moody cow who didn't pull her weight when you worked together x years ago

TheBogQueen · 23/06/2014 13:28

She was/is very tall, slim & pretty

Bugger. That's cheese out for me then.

I do have 2 degrees though. I could quote Shakespeare while waddling round supermarket with me cheese

manchestermummy · 23/06/2014 13:29

I work in an office in that I have a desk and it lives in an office, but I don't count myself as having an "office job".

I'm in the middle of my 30s. The profession I'm in will always, always be office-based (maybe I might have my own one day Grin) in that again, my desk has to live somewhere.

What is it that you actually do spegel?

TwinkleTwinkleStarlight · 23/06/2014 13:29

"if it's not perfect no one will die"

Here is your problem. If you have told them that then no wonder you are having problems.

You have only been there a month and you are already labelling people and minimilising the work that they do.

I agree with those that have said that it comes accross as if the work is benneath you.

manchestermummy · 23/06/2014 13:31

Oh and I have two degrees, a postgrad diploma and a lot of experience in my field: am I above being in an office?

I took something out of a filing cabinet day. How ever will I overcome this?

BIWI · 23/06/2014 13:33

Why should your age come into it? Hmm

I started a new job last year, at the age of 54, and it's never been an issue adjusting. I'm 54 not 94 for goodness sake!

TheBogQueen · 23/06/2014 13:35

I know. I was sat at my desk yesterday and people keot phoning me up WTAF is that about??

manchestermummy · 23/06/2014 13:35

I think the OP is suggesting that the office job is the domain of youth, and that because she is in her 30s, she should have moved on in her life.

LindaMcCartneySausage · 23/06/2014 13:35

So don't do it then. Office jobs aren't for everyone - most of us would love to have something that doesn't suck out our creativity or whatever, but in reality most of us suck it up because we've got bills to pay.

I'm interested in who paid your rent/ mortgage through your 20s while doing 2 degrees and who'll pay it now while you 'start your own business'? An understanding partner or - as I suspect - your parents....? It's easy not to be committed when nothing rests on you holding on to the office job. Handing out cheese on an ad hoc basis doesn't pay for much. It sounds like you have no work ethic because you have a safety net.

Isn't it time you looked for a job connected with the internships and 2 degrees worth of education?

UptheChimney · 23/06/2014 13:35

To be honest, this is the first real job I've had

Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha,

Yes, YABU. Completely. Sorry my taxes haven't been enough for you to have the life you think you deserve.

Now grow up.

manchestermummy · 23/06/2014 13:37

BogQueen this happens to me too. And when I yell at my phone that has no caller ID "Who is it and what do you want" people laugh and tell me that I have to pick it up to establish this fact.

YouMakeMeHappy · 23/06/2014 13:37

You have an education OP, and load of ideas. Why not quit the job you hate and go for it. Life's too short to be stuck in an office doing a job you hate.
I hate working and I haven't had a job since I was 21, but I love being a sahm.

Vintagejazz · 23/06/2014 13:38

A month isn't very long OP. It can take a while to settle in somewhere new and to click with a couple of colleagues and get the measure of a place. I wouldn't just decide that you're 'not an office type' on the basis of four weeks in one particular office.

I agree that some people do find the structure of office life and regular working hours easier to adapt to than others; but thousands of people who have no choice manage to survive, and even make the most of, life in an office.
And, as others have said, there is a huge spectrum of work that takes place in an office.

glasgowstevenagain · 23/06/2014 13:38

Work in an office for the first time at 36 - been 2 years now and after the initial background noise it beats retail and shifts

Latara · 23/06/2014 13:39

Before I started nursing I thought I might like office admin work so I tried temping in different places. Perhaps temping is a good idea for you as you get to experience very different kinds of offices. For example I worked in offices in the Town Hall, in factory (the best contract), in a bank and in life assurance companies (the worst).

In the end I decided on nursing which is completely different to office work! But it still involves some admin, lots of paperwork, some filing etc.

TheBogQueen · 23/06/2014 13:40

Picking up phone

Sheesh

And there you were, sitting being creative...

TheBogQueen · 23/06/2014 13:43

On a serious note - all workplaces have a culture. If you relax are friendly and get to know people they will often surprise you especially with kindness and generosity.

Just try and learn as much as you can and then move on.

HauntedNoddyCar · 23/06/2014 13:44

My mum's first office job was in her late 40s. She found it a doddle.

Mind you she'd been a primary school teacher before that so maybe that was why...

TooExtraImmatureCheddar · 23/06/2014 13:46

Office jobs aren't the domain of youth! Now if you were talking bar-tending/waitressing/barista-ing etc you might have a point.

SuperFlyHigh · 23/06/2014 13:47

use your 2 degrees to help you get a proper job then.

if you're anything like you are on this thread then I bet by your attitude alone you get right up your co-workers' nose.

SuperFlyHigh · 23/06/2014 13:47

sorry noses.

MaryPoppinsBag · 23/06/2014 13:48

Don't be so ridiculous OP. You are being stuck up. Get your head down, do your work properly and with good grace or leave and let someone else!

You have two degrees?

SuperFlyHigh · 23/06/2014 13:49

remember OP that during first 2 years of your employment you aren't protected either so if they can't stand you as much as you can't stand them then you're out. normally no warnings either.

On a kinder note just take it easy (work though!) and try and find an environment that might be suited to you better (British Board of Cheese?!).

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