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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think that my daughter doesn't need shoes yet?

59 replies

bayrans · 20/06/2014 19:43

My daughter is 11 months old, happily cruising and (sort of) walking with a walker.
Even in the cooler months she pulled socks off and has never had any form of pram shoe or slipper, now it's summer she's barefoot all the time and obviously loves it.
I am BU to want to dry slap everyone that suggests that she NEEDS shoes NOW!
Especially for my Mother who has pointed out every frilly, pink monstrosity she has clapped eyes on and is adamant that she will get her her first pair of shoes (I don't think so mommy dearest!)

OP posts:
Sidthesausage · 20/06/2014 20:17

Mine had those thin leather baby slipper sock things - so nothing even semi ridgid until 16 months. Mine started to walk at 13 months

bayrans · 20/06/2014 20:18

She has converse socks Smile

And Mocc-ons for when it was chillier, the only things that she couldn't pull off of her feet!

I dread getting her shoes actually, she'll probably spend most of her time sitting down working out how to get them off.

OP posts:
happylittlevegemites · 20/06/2014 20:21

I'm a podiatrist* and my advice is (generally ... in some cases I'd recommend otherwise) to put off buying first shoes as long as you can manage. We wear shoes predominately to protect our feet from injury, but it does reduce sensory feedback. So wait until she's walking outside (properly walking outside. Not just taking a step or two on your lawn).

Unless you want to put her in cute shoes while she's in the buggy (I'm thinking not, though). So long as they fit, nothing wrong with that.

*insert here disclaimer about a stranger on the internet not replacing an actual professional consultation!

happylittlevegemites · 20/06/2014 20:22

Oh my boy LOVES shoes. To him, shoes = going outside for a walk. He sometimes brings them to me if he wants to go out.

Lweji · 20/06/2014 20:23

Slap away.

The other day I was shocked but had to hold my tongue at a 5 month baby wearing shoes. WTF for?

Waltonswatcher · 20/06/2014 20:26

Mine all had bobux soft leather slippers for outside play , unless on grass . I can't bear to see shoes on too soon . It's a load of crap . Bare foot when ever safe to do so .

Wincher · 20/06/2014 20:26

Ds1 started cruising in about October and walking in December. He loved crawling around in the playground and climbing and the soft leather shoes just got wrecked in the wet and his feet were soaking and freezing, so I bought him cruisers. If he was at that stage at this time of year I wouldn't have bothered. Ds2 is 9 months so will probably be at that stage this winter (he's not moving at all yet! ) so I'll probably buy him cruisers too

ikeaismylocal · 20/06/2014 20:31

We didn't put ds in proper shoes for a long time, he also didn't wear socks as it was warm in our apartment/nursery/friend's houses and I think socks make it more likely that the baby will slip over.

We were constantly given packs of socks and shoes, I think our families the in-laws thought we didn't have enough money to buy shoes Confused We just gave the shoes away.

SquattingNeville · 20/06/2014 20:33

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

CarmineRose1978 · 20/06/2014 20:36

Why is bare feet best? Genuine question, I'm pregnant with our first!

I always had bare feet whenever I could possibly get away with it growing up (and even now) and now my toes are all really far apart (not webbed). My friends tease me for having "frog feet" but I think their squashed together toes look weirder! My partner's feet are barely wider at the toe end than at the leg end!

HaPPy8 · 20/06/2014 20:38

YANBU to say she doesn't need shoes yet. YABU not to let your mum buy the first pair ...they are bloody expensive and any offer to buy them for you should be accepted with open arms!

ItsAllGoingToBeFine · 20/06/2014 20:46

Bare feet best as huge amount if nerves in feet - same as hands. Barefoot means feet can feel the ground, much better for balance etc

Also your toes should splay when you walk, balance/shock absorption - shoes will often prevent this - especially "supportive" ones.

Arch support is very popular but the devils work. Our feet have evolved arches for a reason (shock absorption/stability) - as soon as you push up on an arch from underneath (arch support) it messes it right up. Ask an engineer!

CarpetBagger · 20/06/2014 20:48

I thought it was done to keep feet bare for as long as possible to help bones and then to walk?

you will need something when she walks out. I hate seeing tiny babies feet sqashed into a horrid fashion shoes, esp those plastic things.

HilariousInHindsight · 20/06/2014 20:50

No, she doesn't need shoes.

DD who is 14 months has shoes but that's mainly for when we have a wander around outside with her so she doesn't hurt her feet if there is anything like glass/gravel etc on the floor.

Indoors she wears them sometimes, sometimes not.

I only got them when she was 12 months and really didn't need to but I just wanted her to have some 'just in case'.

I think once your child starts to walk around outside be that with help or on their own which to me could be anywhere from 12 months to 24 months that's when shoes are necessary.

HaroldLloyd · 20/06/2014 20:50

I didn't buy shoes until he was walking quite well outside and so needed them.

Now it's hot he hardly wears them, only if we are out on paths etc.

Apart from anything else you have to make the absolute most of their squishy feet when you can!

Tell your mum to shurrup.

waitingforwombat · 20/06/2014 20:57

YANBU.

My daughter is nearly 11 months old and also cruising/walking around holding hands. She is barefoot all the time. In the past 2 weeks I have had 2 strangers coming up to me when my daughter is in the pushchair to let me know that she had "lost" her shoes!!

As far as I can work out the only benefit of shoes is that it would protect her feet from the thistles in our lawn/grazing her toes on paving slabs. However as her feet are still so tiny that they are miles too small for clarks size 2, there isn't a temptation to shell out £30 just yet. Even when she does need walking shoes (ie walking in park etc) and her feet are finally big enough for actual shoes I am hoping to still opt for soft doodles type things until it is too wet/snowing and then switch to wellies! Little feet don't need inflexible leather shoes.

bayrans · 20/06/2014 21:01

Thankyou all! A rather unanimous YANBU!!

I've has randoms approach me too asking where her shoes are?!!

I love my little girls sweaty little piggies and I shan't be covering them up anytime soon Smile

OP posts:
PrincessBabyCat · 20/06/2014 21:05

The only shoes I can find for babies are the cloth ones that are basically slippers with little straps. Which really aren't shoes at all.

DD can't even keep socks on. DM came up the other day and got irritated at me for not putting socks on her cold feet. She just has poor circulation, but she was perfectly happy being barefoot. Or maybe I'm projecting since my feet are always cold and I'm perfectly comfortable.

MaryWestmacott · 20/06/2014 21:05

DD is 12 months and just walking the last month, we've not bought proper shoes, but have got her leather slippers this but navy (I don't do pink either). They are really to protect her feet when outside, but not restricting her feet, we did start with socks with grips on the bottom (you can get plain white ones in sainsburys) but she seems to love standing in mud... She also likes pulling socks off but doesn't seem to with the slippers.

We did the same for DS until he was walking properly (about 3 months after he took his first independent steps), that was over winter and he wanted to stand outside on snow, bare feet isn't really appropriate...

I'm not going ot move on to frilly silly shoes from a chain shop though, tell your mum when your DD is ready for real shoes you'll take her to proper shoe shop and have her feet measured, suggest Clarks, in my experience, our mum's generation all seem to think that Clarks are the ultimate in children's footwear...

rallytog1 · 20/06/2014 21:05

YANBU.

My dd is 14mo and we're getting her first pair of shoes this weekend. I wasn't sure, but she spent most of today being exceptionally cross that I wouldn't let her walk along the gravelly paths at a NT property because she had bare feet. She can walk a few metres on her own but will go for ages holding someone's hand. So I think it's time, but she'll only wear them for going out - at home, in the garden and at nursery it will be bare feet for a while longer.

HavanaSlife · 20/06/2014 21:11

Ds4 had shoes just after his 1st birthday, 2 weeks after he started walking running because he really needed them for walking around outside and ime it takes them a few weeks to get used to walking in them. He just had some soft summer clarkes jobbies as they were quite light.

My friend has clarkes cruisers for her dd as she wanted her to get used to having on shoes from early, after watching mine refuse to walk in them Grin

So no your dd doesn't need shoes yet imho, ds3 walked at 16 months, didn't have shoes until about 20 months.Actually he's just turned 3 and only wears shoes if we are going out, if we are in the garden he doesn't bother. I've never known I child be able to walk on stones and gravel the way he does

FreeButtonBee · 20/06/2014 21:11

My twins walked at 11months and were full on running around at their 1st birthday party. They had little suede pram shoes for about 6 weeks from when they started walking but inly when outside. Then soft cruiser shoes (startrite fabric ones with buckles) at 12.5months. They demand their shoes off when they get inside so still spend 50% or more of the day barefoot. I love their little gnarly gnome feet. They are teeny though and only just big enough for wellies at 16mo/baby size 3!

MaryWestmacott · 20/06/2014 21:12

oh and we might be getting her other shoes this week, we're on holiday next week and I realised the beach might be a bit pebbly, so I'm going to try to get some of those waterproof bootie shoes...

HaroldLloyd · 20/06/2014 21:13

Bayrans I had that too. My mother and MIL were bloody obsessed with it.

Even now in the garden they run around panicking he's got NO SHOES ON. NO SHOOOEEEESSS on.

MaryWestmacott · 20/06/2014 21:14

Rally - you could look at someting like the leather slippers I linked to, rather than 'real' shoes with hard soles.

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