Arggghhhh my nosy mother!

[Freckletoes]

Parents have just visited unannounced as they do but I guess we're used to this now!. AIBU hate the fact that, while my dad sits down to chat, my DM wanders around my house nosing at EVERYTHING! Turning pages of the diary to see what is written down, shuffling through paperwork and reading it all, taking documents out of envelopes and reading them, peering through all the stuff on the notice boards..... She even surpassed herself today by going through my DS2 blazer pockets (non uniform today) and when challenged said "I'm just checking to see what he has forgotten to give to you!" Her usual response is "I'm just looking." As if that is a great excuse! FFS-my house, my stuff!! Keep your nosy beak out!
AIBU?
and I know I am being ranty

Bloody hell just tell her no it's private and she needs to keep her beak out.

That would be crossing the boundaries in my opinion. Yanbu.

I would keep a spray bottle handy and spray her every time she sticks her nose where it isn't supposed to be. It apparently works for dog training.

Oh she gets told, but can't see the problem in it! I like the spray bottle idea kinky!! Wonder what I could put it in it though...water seems a little too mild!

Seriously, pull her up on this very sternly. It is completely unacceptable.

Gin?

the only thing is notice boards aren't private, they are stuck on the wall with the printing pointing forward, so public in my view. but if you have to open stuff that is too far, ohh put some bangers in things.

and it is time to get your own back, "mum don't look in there, because I SAID SO"

Go through her handbag. Cheeky mare!

My mother is similar, but more furtive! I've gone to the loo before and come back to find her rifling through paperwork. She has also arrived at the house before and stared in through the letterbox rather than knocking or ringing the bell. I hate her coming round because I feel so on edge. I don't know what she is trying to find, and really there is nothing to hide but her loony behaviour makes me feel uptight and anxious. Sorry - I haven't offered any advice on how to deal with your mother. Just to let you know I feel your pain.

Oh maaaaaaan I feel your pain. I really do.

My mum will ask me how much things cost and how much I earn without a thought of it being a bit nosey. When I pull her up on her nosiness interfering she makes out that I'm unduly sensitive or secretive!

You know what you have to do - right?

You must plant wonderful things for her to discover.

Mock up headed paper from a factious Harley Street Clinic addressed to Mr Freckletoes re: his upcoming sex change operation.

Address a letter to yourself advising in the strongest terms against proceeding with implanting eight embryos in one cycle.

Slip a hand written note in your sons blazer pocket "'Dear Aunt Irma, My nosy grandmother went through my pockets. I feel so violated I think I have no choice but to run away. Do you recommend London or Glasgow for a friendlier street-sleeping scene?"

Mothers like that still see their grown up offspring as still their children.

I'd be tempted to strategically place a mousetrap into the middle of the paperwork.......

Fill all your pockets with condoms. And the envelopes, more condoms. And the drawers, even more condoms. A fountain of condoms. That'll larn her.

What about if you turn up unannounced at their house a few times and do the same thing there, might she eventually get the hint? Mother or not, I do think it is incredibly rude of her to do that.

I'm with Kif and HayDay. Plant stuff. (I live 500 miles - inlcuding flights -away from my parents so they have to warn me they're coming so this is not a problem currently.)

At uni there was a lecturer who was notoriously nosey about his personal tutees ie first tutorial he sat there, clapped his hands together and said 'Right. Anyone got any really good personal problems?' Except that my group had been warned.....so one lad said, 'er yeah, actually, um y'see my girlfriend's pregnant, and the scan showed triplets, but actually I think I might be gay...' Tutor went ashen. Then puce when the other 4 of us pissed ourselves laughing. Learnt his lesson I believe.

I had a landlord who did this, looked at our paperwork, randomly removed pills from our contraceptive pill packets, went through the underwear drawers. Razor blades in the drawers stopped it.

She needs a lesson in boundaries. Does she still think you are 5?

I think people do this as underlying the behaviour is a wish to be close and intimate, like they were in childhood.

Could you and your mum find other more adult ways of being close and intimate? Then she might not feel the need to be so annoying any more.

dawn that's a higher level of disturbing.

Sometimes it's just unthinking habit. My DM thankfully doesn't rummage but she asks reflexively absolutely everything. What are you eating? What are you cooking? What will you be eating today? (it's seven am, I haven't thought that far ahead yet mum) What's that? (letter or parcel) Where are you going?

There are times when I've had to look her straight in the eye and say 'You really don't want to know'. But the rummaging.... I'm all for the gin in the spray bottle. Or a rolled up newspaper.

Bloody was Happy, three of us noticed it and started keeping diaries at work. We left, soon after, got a place where the landlord didn't live in the basement flat!

Dawndonna, what a seriously messed up landlord! Glad you moved out.

Both my mum and mil are like this. My mil even told me that she steams open bill's post! I am obsessive about not letting them have a key when we are away! When we are there, they both wander round asking questions and picking fault making 'suggestions'. I have no doubt if they got in unsupervised, they would be rifling through the paperwork and drawers!

bil's post. not bill's lol

My mother does something similar, picks up and reads all cards left on the mantelpiece, nosies into anything she can. I get cross and tell her to stop but it's like she can't help it. It pisses me off so much.