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Original poster

Work trying to bully me into cancelling holiday

387 replies

worridmum · 07/06/2014 16:47

Sorry if this is the wrong place but this section has the most traffic and hoping for someone to help me.

Long story short is a booked my annaul leave in january in line with company policy and it was approved. After the approval I booked an expesive holiday to the USA for 3 weeks to see my parents as my father is in poor health and would like to see him before he deterates futher (long term problem with no possiblity of a cure sadly).

Now the crux of the problem last week my work colleuge is now wanting to start her metinity leave 2 months early than planned and now because our department is small one of us must be in the building for the department to run (I dont want to give too much details here as its very specislt field of work and dont want to out myself) and the meritity cover cannot start 2 months early than planned so my boss is putting large amounts of pressure to cancel my holiday and treating gross misconduct when I refused to cancel it as my manager blunty said when I asked is the company going to compestate for my finacel loss (non-refundable flights / hotel deposits etc) and she basically said tough luck the company WILL NOT pay for the loss of this money (roughly £3000) and I should just absorb this loss and consider it one of those things, which I replied no I am not willing to lose not only my last possible chance of seeing my Father before he passes away but also that amount of money which is a large amount for me.

Which is the reason she is quoting gross misconduct as I am refusing to cancel my holiday with only 2 weeks notice and that I am expected to eat the fiancal loss as well as prescous time with my father and my question is twofold

I am unreasonable to refuse to NOT cancel my holiday no matter that it will causes massive problems for the company and the second are they legally allowed to breech their own policies relating to booked holidays to be able to say my holiday will be treated as unauthrised absance and thus a gross misconduct offence even though I have all the documents saying it was authorised etc and finally if they are allowed to cancel my holiday at such short notice can force them to pay for my lost money so I am not out of pocket (travel insurnce will not pay out as it is not covered by their terms)

I am sorry for the long post and if it is in the wrong area and for any spelling or grammer mistakes as I have dylexia and no spell checker on this device.

OP posts:
Puzzledandpissedoff · 12/06/2014 20:03

It's a shame about your colleague's missed early leave, but with the best will in the world it's honestly not your problem to sort out - she too works for these idiots and she'll have to work it out for herself

Which reminds me ... I don't know if you're still in touch, but if so, I'd avoid discussing this with her at all costs; you simply can't know what pressure might have been put on her and what her agenda might be

Original poster
worridmum · 12/06/2014 20:05

after the ambush and following emails I dont think I can concider her a freind anymore tbh as some of her emails and texts were spiteful and horrid so there is little chance I will be discussing any of this with her as she has successfully burnt all those bridges

OP posts:
Lariflete · 12/06/2014 20:09

Just de-lurking to add some good wishes and hope that the holiday does you all good.
What terrible employers, but you have handled all of this very impressively!

FishWithABicycle · 12/06/2014 20:16

wow have a brilliant holiday and good luck with the jobhunting when you return.
Do return on your previously-agreed return date - it is entirely possible that while you are away their lawyers will knock some sense into them and you may return to an offer of reinstatement - obviously you would still be jobhunting as they are bastards that you wouldn't want to work for, but if they do this then it's possible that failing to return and not responding to such an offer would damage your eventual case against them (not sure whether this is true, just a guess)

Shakey1500 · 12/06/2014 20:22

Well done worriedmum for keeping it together!

DH and I are in a similar situation (similar as in Gross Misconduct, acas, lawyers etc) and it IS very stressful. And even when everything seems in your favour, it still makes you doubt yourself Sad So, be prepared for a little bit more stress. BUT, put it on hold for now and enjoy your holiday, refresh and come back fighting. Don't let the bastards grind you down Grin

Nessalina · 12/06/2014 20:24

Good grief. Amazed by this thread! Well done on staying so calm and standing your ground! So glad that you have a hot-shot lawyer fighting your corner for you now! Grin
Definitely cut contact with your 'friend' until this is over. Her correspondence with you is part of the issue, so best not to discuss in case she's being pressurised to find out stuff from you Sad
Enjoy your holiday, best wishes to your Dad Thanks

Puzzledandpissedoff · 12/06/2014 20:25

... there is little chance I will be discussing any of this with her as she has successfully burnt all those bridges

Very wise Wink It's just that it occurred to me that, when they realise the mess they've got themselves into, they might persuade her to contact you on a fact finding mission, if you see what I mean?

whatever5 · 12/06/2014 20:29

Well done. Your ex colleagues have been incredibly stupid and very nasty. Your pregnant colleague is a snake in the grass and I have no sympathy for her regarding her maternity leave.

Enjoy your holiday and try not to worry too much. I'm sure everything will turn out well for you.

Timeforabiscuit · 12/06/2014 20:42

Hope you have a wonderful holiday !

BeCool · 12/06/2014 20:48

You rock OP - I'm so delighted to read your update. I admire how you have handled this very much.

Have a great holiday and please update us on your return!!

FuckYouChrisAndThatHorse · 12/06/2014 20:55

Wow, you have been treated appallingly. Enjoy your break and let us know how it all goes when you get back. Good luck!

londonrach · 12/06/2014 21:02

Well done worried mum you are amazing strong lady. You go and see your dad, forget about the b......... Return when you meant to as I suspect the b........ Will be eating humble pie by then. Xxx

londonrach · 12/06/2014 21:03

Just a thought the snake in the grass friend she's not a mnetter is she as if due re baby she might become. X

Shewhowines · 12/06/2014 21:04

Have a lovely holiday. Would love to be a fly on the wall when they realise you have backed up the emails.

mistlethrush · 12/06/2014 21:09

I'm glad you've managed to get a solicitor and get some reassurance before going on your holiday. I hope you're able to put it all to the back of your mind whilst you're away.

msrisotto · 12/06/2014 21:09

I'm so pleased you didn't take this lying down op. They are such idiots for behaving the way they have.

Try to put it out of your mind for your holiday

glasgowstevenagain · 12/06/2014 21:09

They emailed you telling you to leave early.
Deleted it from your inbox.
sacked you for leaving early.

Mental.

Lucky you got the email.

enjoy the holiday

glasgowstevenagain · 12/06/2014 21:09

Oh and

HornyHandsofToil · 12/06/2014 21:10

A friend of mine worked for a firm backing up all the internal electronic communication. Apparently, there is a famous sexual harassment case where the former female employee claimed a male employee sent xyz on company email. Judge asks for email. Former female employee shrugs and says she deleted it (years now in court) but surely it's backed up by company and they can produce a
copy.

Company did not have backed up email more than 1 year.

Judge ruled in favour of ex employee, placing burden of proof on the company.

So really, you don't even need a copy of the emails.
You just need to state one was sent and the burden of proof is on the company to prove otherwise.

glasgowstevenagain · 12/06/2014 21:11

I can't believe a big company would act this way

glasgowstevenagain · 12/06/2014 21:11

They emailed you telling you to leave early.
Deleted it from your inbox.
sacked you for leaving early.

Mental.

Lucky you got the email.

enjoy the holiday

londonrach · 12/06/2014 21:12

Worried mum just checking you have printed off all the emails now havent you. Enjoy your holiday. I really miss I was a fly on the wall when the b..... Learn you printed the emails off. X

Original poster
worridmum · 12/06/2014 21:30

londonrach printed of AND backed up onto a penstick and my husbands back up drives (you can never have to many back up copies of ICT after what happened in university were 2 of my 3 back ups of my 20,000 word Thesis corupted and was only saved as I saved it on 3 sperate decives )

OP posts:
mipmop · 12/06/2014 21:31

In my experience (I've seen this happen to a few people), the more the company has failed to follow their own procedures and follow employment law, the more likely they are to go on the attack and exaggerate or invent stories about the employee. Try not to take it personally, it's just a sign of their desperation.

I agree with the others saying be careful who you talk to in real life about this, for various reasons -protecting your case and also protecting your professional reputation. Also if you accept a compromise agreement, it likely has a clause about disclosing your story to others and sometimes talks retrospectively. Talking to your immediate family is to be expected of course.

I also urge you to reconsider moving this thread, or deleting it and starting another which has less story "they don't know I have the emails!" but would be useful for general support.

Hopefully now you have this solicitor it'll all become less stressful as you've someone reminding you that the company are talking nonsense.

IrianofWay · 12/06/2014 21:40

Well done Op!

Wankers! Angry