Expect DH to Facebook defriend OW after affair ended?

[st273447]

So the affair has ended and DH committed to our relationship, but my DH is still FB friends with OW?

Should I have to ask to defriend or am I being unreasonable?

Wow! Not often people agree with me.

chip don't let your head swell too big

this thread is a bit of a no-brainer

Every thread to me is a no brainer, just not everyone agrees with me!

Hey, that what I think too !gets me into trouble sometimes

Honestly? It might be time for YOU to defriend HIM.

Wow. I'd go berserk.

You either trust DH or you don't. The fb thing is really irrelevant. I personally will never give in to such an ultimatum. Even if I had intended to block a person on fb, being challenged would ensure I did not do it. I will agree I can be truly irrational at times though, cos I'm truly cussed.

I normally agree with you Any.

Why don't you write on his wall " Dear cheating H, you're dumped"?.

I couldn't be with anyone who stubbornly refused to do somethign easily within their power just to prove a point.

have you had any many successful relationships, Janethegirl

Oh come on folks - where's the trust? I mean, it's just Facebook. They're not actually meeting up or anything. What's the harm ;-). Everybody's so uptight.

If it was DH, I'd of strung him up by his balls till they turned blue. Then the ow could have him and his blue balls.

LTB !!!!

The fact that he hasn't thought to do this on his own accord would be the sign that I would need to dump his sorry arse. With a smile and a big fat middle finger right in his face....SEE YA!

Have strength OP x

anyfucker yes I have, and have been happily married for many a year :) Whatever I'm doing works for us, even if it's not for you. However I trust my DH and he trusts me.

I am glad to hear it, Jane. You must have budged an inch at least once in order to not purposely hurt your husband in that case.

maybe he wants to keep in contact with her

even if the affair is not longer going on this is not a good sign

and its sad that your are questioning yourself over this

It's all about trust. Yes you can unfriend on fb but there are many other methods of communication if you really want too. Fb is not the be all and end all of communications.

If the OPs DH wants to keep communications open with the OW he will. Is it not better for him to be upfront about it than use subterfuge? Should he tell the OP he has defriended her on fb then contact the OW by alternative means? If the OP does not trust her DH she should LTB.

It's all about trust

Absolutely.

Everyone deserves to be trusted until they prove themselves unworthy.

Once that trust is broken, they have to work pretty damn hard to regain it.

YANBU

If the OPs DH wants to keep communications open with the OW he will. Is it not better for him to be upfront about it than use subterfuge?

How does keeping OW on FB preclude subterfuge?

This bloke doesn't even respect his wife enough to conduct his extramaritals under some sort of cover of darkness! I can't see how shagging someone else in plain sight is any way preferable to skulking around.

Even now she's found out, he won't take the basic step of severing contact.

She shouldn't need to issue an ultimatum - and the idea of refusing to defriend one's co-adulterer out of sheer bloodymindedness is just

So the affair has ended and DH committed to our relationship

Yeah, I don't think so.

As for Jane, well, there's always one.