To not want other peoples kids to eat all my bloody food

[IsChippyMintonExDirectory]

We had a BBQ at the weekend and DHs family including various nieces and nephews came over. There was loads of food being cooked and plenty for everyone, we have ended up cramming the freezer full stuff left over. Yet when I to make DD a cheese and ham toastie yesterday there was a piddly bit of cheese left, 1 slice of bread and an empty ham packet in the fridge. First thought was DH has been a greedy sod, but he said it wasn't him and he wouldn't ever put an empty packet back in the fridge cos he knows I'd kill him. Looking further in the fridge and cupboards we had depleted amounts of chicken slices, grapes, crisps, juice and crackers.

Bumped into SIL this morning in the supermarket (topping up on food that was lost) and passive aggresively joked that I must have borrowers as our food is dissapearing and she said "Oh that was the kids on Saturday, you know what they're like their stomachs are a bottomless hole and they got bored of BBQ food." No apology or further explanation (3 of the kids were hers btw and I suspect it was just them taking the food as the other nieces and nephews are 2-3 years old).

AIBU to think this is not on? Were not on the bread line but it annoys me when DD is hungry and I don't have what she wants on hand cos someone elses kids have nicked it. I adore my nieces and nephews, and I know it's not their fault and would never hold it against them, but surely BIL or SIL should have told them to ask before they took our grub, or just at what had been cooked? They are 12, 9 and 8 btw.

Am I just being a grumposaurus?

I love the word 'ratch' in this context by the way - we don't have that down my way but will be trying to make it happen

Oh and please, I didn't actually pay for the side, I laughed and said I think the side is on you, you cheeky mare. Just demonstrating that previously normal folks do the kids food sharing thing.

OP are you in the North East? I say retching around too.

Ratching not retching

I think the cheekiness is that she rummaged without asking.

And ended up eating food intended for the following week. It is the inconvenience that it's so bloody rude.

I think it is downright rude of SIL.

I guess I'm weird as it wouldn't really bother me, I'd be glad the kids felt at home.

it is incredibly rude to just help yourself to food in someone else's house, child or adult.

this!

rude. yanbu

my mum's db is like that. ate everything at her house. step dad got really fed up and there was a falling out.

I'm in a minority, but I genuinely don't mind nieces/ nephews/ DC/ DC's friends raiding the fridge. It's food - it's there to be eaten. But my friends and I are very informal, unlike most people on mumsnet. We pop in without phoning, we knock and open the door without waiting for an answer,,,

Ensure your fridge is empty next time they visit. Shop after they have leftp

This would annoy me, as I plan the week's food and shop accordingly. I would have got in the BBQ food, and not have expected all non BBQ food to be raided.

This happened to me once when I threw a party. Lots of guests turned up without bringing a bottle, and raided drink that wasn't for the party. One guest got very cross when I wouldn't let her drink the juice that I was saving for breakfast the next morning - she was one of those who turned up empty-handed.

If someone has taken the time to prepare and cook a meal for you - then to go behind their back and raid their fridge in secret is just plain RUDE! I often have to take some element of the meal with me as DS is dairy intolerant (a fairy cake instead of having a slice of the hosts birthday cake for instance), but would never allow him to pull a stunt like that!

I'd say something like " in future please pick up a take away for your kids on the way over as they find my cooking too boring to deign to eat. We loved your company but not having to go without our own breakfast and packed lunches the next day." I'd mean it too!

Wow. I must be one of the few that has family that does the "make yourself at home" bit. Our family it's "You know where the food is, you know how to use the stove, knock yourself out".

We do that to our friends too. First time I'll bring you a drink and food, after that you're family.

I guess the draw back is, yes food disappears. When visiting we never know how much food we have left so we're constantly all running to the store to grab communal snacks. Oh, I guess that's the other part to it, we all contribute to the food if we actually want to eat before the wolf pack gets it. It works out in the end though.

Same here Princess!

CorusKate
if you are at home and hes out do you call him to ask if it is ok to eat the sausages? Do you really dont eat them if you fancy them?

I'm not so bothered about my own family eating things although my ds does tend to eat things without asking but that is more snacky cupboard stuff. I don't really mind as he is my son. I do most of the shopping and keep a check on the fridge. If all else fails we have a mini tesco very nearby and I often send him up there for things.

I think though if relatives visit then it is rude to turn your nose up at things provided for you then go in the fridge to help yourself. Your dsil should have asked if it was ok to make 1 sandwich as ds etc wasn't too keen on bbq food and been tactful. I wouldn't invite them again.

Shocked they took without asking. Very bad manners even if family. The polite thing to go would be ask and if necessary you could have got something that wasn't needed. I've never heard of someone helping themshelves without asking even in day to day life.