Noisy holiday neighbours at night vs my noisy early riser children

[balloondoggy]

My children are 6, 8 and 10. They go to bed at around 7.30ish most school nights or 8-8.30 on weekends and holidays. However, this holiday they have been so active with hours of swimming that they are in bed at 7. They are shattered.

However, they are naturally early risers. They are up any time from 6am.

Our villa circles the pool with 7 other villas. These other holiday guests are all adults and up late drinking etc. about 11pm. They are loud, but I've not complained.

The hotel has complained that our children are too loud walking to the restaurant in the morning for breakfast, which starts at 8am.

I'm really pissed off. It's okay to be loud and disturb a family's sleep at night. But not wake a bunch of 30 something's at 8 when breakfast is served.

Ask the hotel to deliver breakfast for your family to your villa each day, then no one will be disturbed.

I think it would be nice if you went past the villas as quietly as possible with no unnecessary chat. I'd appreciate it.

Yanbu and I say that as someone who likes a lie in. Why on earth do adults trump children on holiday? OP is not complaining just putting things in context.

Sorry I'm a bit at the number of people who think OP is BU. I've already posted my view but also agree with Bella

"let's walk quietly past other people's doors as they may still be asleep and we don't want to wake them up"

OR

"you have a right to talk! you are on holiday too and you have a right to enjoy yourself even if you are waking everybody up! It's 8am it's not unreasonable to wake them up! They knew there would be children at this resort! After all they were up until 11pm keeping us awake! We are just doing to them what they did to us!"

Both these responses are reasonable, but the first may be a better lesson for the DC. There is a time to stand up for themselves and fight for their right to enjoy themselves but this is not it.

Yanbu, 8am is not that early. Also it's only as you walk past, hardly standing outside their window shouting for hours.

YANBU

Unless you're making a hell of a racket then I don't know why anyone would complain.

ThornOfCamorr
It's not about who has paid the most (which is a depressing way to think of it to my mind) but about the needs of the many outweighing the needs of the few. 8am may not be early to you, but it is to many people and I can't see how accommodating their needs would impinge on the OP and her family that much.

What country are you holidaying in? I guess you are not in the UK

In Spain, 8am is very very early to be up with children. Children will be up until midnight on holiday and wake up sometime between 9am and midday.

Of course this will depend what nationalities are at the hotel. Spanish people hate going to hotels with Brits and Germans because none of the hours coincide with Spanish hours so there is a kind of hotel apartheid here

No, the majority don't get to dictate to the minority, esp when the minority aren't doing anything wrong.

If the majority have a problem with people walking to breakfast at 8am then they need to suggest that the hotel moves breakfast back to a later hour (which would be silly), or do the sensible thing and buy some ear plugs. Or not holiday in school half term - which is what most right minded adults without children do.

Before I became a mum, I'd have loved having your kids next door cause I always slept in for breakfast.

yanbu

YANBU.

8am is not too early to be audible, nor should you have to creep around especially as breakfast begins at that time.

We are in cornwall

SirChenjin

It doesn't sound as though anyone is 'dictating' to anyone, just asking the families who are up early to be sensitive to the needs of the other guests who are still sleeping at that time. It is surely no inconvenience to be a bit quieter whilst walking past people's doors, especially if you are the only few people awake at that time?
If it was somewhere like Disney, where the majority of guests will be families with small children, I would suggest that it was more reasonable to expect people to be quiet late at night to accommodate families who will have sleeping children. It's a question of expectations.
To suggest that people should ask a hotel to change their breakfast hours rather than asking a family to keep quiet whilst passing others' doors seems like a bizarre way to approach a problem such as this - would that really be your first port of call? And surely once you mentioned your reasoning for such a suggestion, the hotel would probably try asking the family in question to be quiet before making any changes anyway.

1. The OP makes it clear that she's not making a loud noise when walking past their doors. She's simply walking to her breakfast, conversing with her family.

1. If you holiday in a shared villa complex in half term then you have to expect that families will be there, and that there will be a bit of noise from 8am onwards (which is not early) when these families are walking to breakfast. It's one of the reasons many adults chose to avoid school holidays and holiday at another time.

1. If you read what I wrote, I said that changing the time of breakfast was silly - although if 'the needs' of the majority are such that 8am is too early for them to be woken by families simply talking as they make their way to b/fast then perhaps the hotel may be open to that suggestion. Alternatively they might just explain that it's half term, and that if they chose to holiday at that time in a shared complex which offers breakfast from that time then they might just happen to get woken, unless they wear earplugs.

1. And surely once you mentioned your reasoning for such a suggestion, the hotel would probably try asking the family in question to be quiet before making any changes anyway. Conversely, the hotel could ask the adults who are making a loud noise at night to keep quiet - but I suspect they will simply point out that it's a shared holiday facility, and as such there is a bit of give and take required.

What sane adult without children stays in a shared villa complex in Cornwall in half term?

In 20 years of holidays pre-dd we managed to avoid being in close proximity to other people's children. It's not difficult.

I feel a bit sorry for the OP tbh. Sounds like the hotel isn't very family friendly, there are plenty of other places in Cornwall that are though, spend your money elsewhere instead.

Conversely, the hotel could ask the adults who are making a loud noise at night to keep quiet

But the OP didn't complain about noise at night - so why would they ask anyone to be quiet if, as far as they're concerned, everybody is happy with that?

I'm not saying that the OP is making an unreasonable amount of noise, just that they haven't asked anyone to be quiet at night, so they can't really use that as a reason why they are not prepared to make more effort to be quiet in the morning.

No, she hasn't complained about the noise at night so far - but she did state that she is tempted to now, given that her fellow guests have now decided that she's making too much noise walking to breakfast with her family. It's all about that give and take, isn't it?

What sane adult without children stays in a shared villa complex in Cornwall in half term? Exactly.

If the hotel serve breakfast at 8am then they should expect noise at that time.

Those saying they'd be unhappy being woken at 8am on holiday and kids shouldn't make a sound till 11am are bonkers. If that's what you want then go to an adults only hotel/villa complex.

Its perfectly reasonable for kids to make noise at 8am so long as they're not running and screaming. Normal walking/talking is fine. If adults choose to go on holiday where children are allowed then they should accept the possibility of being woken when the kids are going to breakfast/playing.

So are these people complaining that there should be no noise from ANYONE (including lovely adults) at 8am? Or is it just that they don't have kids so they think everyone will agree with them that the awful KIDS are too loud? How would this thread have gone if the OP had said my husband, mother and I walk to breakfast at 8am and other guests have complained that we are too loud yet we are just chatting?

There is a reason that holiday websites feature a tick box that indicates 'Adults only'. Perhaps the other guests might consider it in future. A little research would have gone a long way here.

As one of the childless 30-somethings who thinks even midnight (shock) is fair game on a holiday, I could not get cross if I'd voluntarily put myself in their pickle.

No, she hasn't complained about the noise at night so far - but she did state that she is tempted to now, given that her fellow guests have now decided that she's making too much noise walking to breakfast with her family. It's all about that give and take, isn't it?

Well, that's her prerogative, if she wants them to be quieter at night, just as it was the prerogative of the others to complain about their noise in the morning. I just think that the OP seems to think she has done them a favour by not complaining about them when she was annoyed by their noise, but as far as they knew, it wasn't bothering her, so there was no reason for them to feel as though the OP and her family had done them a favour by not complaining in the spirit of 'give and take'.

As an aside, it seems to me that asking people to chat more quietly on their way to breakfast isn't likely to have as significant an impact on someone's holiday as being asked not to stay up/out late in the evenings. Two minutes a day of keeping your voices down vs missing out on hours of entertainment a night don't really compare to my mind. However, that's not the point, just something that I would probably weigh up if I had any particularly strong feelings either way.

I once posted on AIBU and got slated. I was on holiday and a neighbour complained that my children were playing at 9pm whe hers were trying to sleep.
I didn't say a word whe hers were playing at 7am but got slated on here saying I should be considerate of her kids trying to sleep.
Seems you are getting the opposite response op!

Cornwall? I imagined it was somewhere hot?

disappointed