to think maybe we'll never have enough space?

[LoveBomber]

We currently live in a smallish (900 sq ft) 3 bed semi with three children. The dses share a room (one pre teen and one toddler) and dd has the box room. We have one bathroom, no second loo, small garden.

So cramped and cluttered as you'd expect.

We are very fortunate to be able to buy a bigger house, and should be moving this time next month. The new house has 4 double bedrooms, 1400 sq foot, ensuite and downstairs loo, family room, study. I have spent many happy hours planning furniture layouts in all the glorious space.

However, my mum has just reminded me that I was just as excited when we moved into this house from our tiny flat, and its only taken us 5 years to outgrow it. She said that we'll never have enough space as we'll expand to fill the space we have. That unless you buy a mansion, all houses feel too small eventually.

Is she right? Please tell me that when you've moved into your 'forever home' it feels spacious and right and not eventually cramped and small. We aren't having any more children, my mum just means we'll accumulate stuff.

I think it depends how you use the downstairs space tbh.

In the plan it looks pretty wasted to me.

I live in a 4 bedroom hpuse, 3 doubles, 2 en-suites plus family bathroom, garage... I have 4 dcs and want to move ... Its so cluttered, want 6 bedrooms.

It's really not wasted, it works perfectly for us.

The study will be DH's room for all his guitar stuff, cds, the pc and most of his books.

The family/breakfast room bit will be where we eat, it fits our dining table with room to spare, we can also fit a dresser in later if needed.

The kitchen has twice as many cupboards as we currently have, and the utility room leads into the garage.

The dining room will be for the piano, a tv and some seating for the older two kids.

Front room is mine all mine, were going to put some ikea bookcase in there but other than that it is my clutter free room.

There is a HUGE under stairs cupboard, and a huge cupboard over the bulkhead in DS1's room, another big cupboard on the landing and a cupboard for coats/shoes in the hall.

The whole back portion of the house is free flowing and all leads out into the garden, it's lovely. And I can shut the front room doors and be totally separate from the back for peace and quiet...

This link has the room dimensions

If I had that house I would have at least 3 more children other than that ours are not at the spacing out stage yet. We are all usually in the same half metre and I have to bribe them to move!

She's wrong! We have 3dcs plus au pair and moved from a 3.5 bedroom, 2 bath house to 5/6 beds, 3 bath plus downstairs loo nearly 2 years ago. We have loads of space and empty cupboards in some rooms....

And we have tons and tons of shit.

I have no doubt that my gdcs will have to spend many hours clearing out those currently empty cupboards when they eventually cart me away, but I really cannot see us running out of space any time soon

Good luck with the move and enjoy the space!

"It's really not wasted, it works perfectly for us."

Yes, because you don't intend to use it as per the plan!

I don't agree. I have a fairly big house now, but my last few houses have been fairly uncluttered. It does mean not keeping 'crap' and not being overly sentimental about items that really don't need to be sentimental, eg I get rid of kids clothing and toys once they are grown of, don't buy lots of gadgets I can't use. I work on the concept if something doesn't have a 'home', eg either permanent home (not a box in the garage), on display or in permanent use, then it goes.

I do think that most people have far more belongings than they need, and often cupboards and garages full of junk that they'll never use again. I always find it astonishing when people leave their very expensive cars on the street or driveway and their garage full of old rubbish and junk. I often watch home shows, such as those wanting to sell or buy a new property and complain of being overcrowded and think 'well why don't you try cleaning up?'.

The plan is how my current place is. I love that look stuff ruins things imo.

OUr problem here is that 2yo DS2 shares a small room (our second bedroom is the same size as the smallest room in the new house) with 11yo DS1, so all the toys live downstairs. At the moment our dining room (same size as the 'dining room' in the new house) is home to a piano, all the toys AND the dining table.

So even though it's not that small it feels really really cramped.

The new house won't. It won't it won't.

We moved from a 2 bed flat to a 4 bed house (two doubles, two singles) and I couldn't imagine it ever feeling small... since having DC it goes through phases - feels cramped then I declutter and it feels big again. After the first time I managed to fill it up with clutter I realised that no house would ever be big enough unless I gave up my hoarding ways - its a challenge as it goes against my upbringing but gradually I think I'm getting there!
So basically I would say that if, on paper, a house should be big enough, then it's up to you to keep it that way! Outgrowing is not inevitable.

Our house seemed huge when we moved in. You fill the space you have. If we had one twice the size, I'm sure we would still fill it.

I don't like throwing things out but I do like surfaces clear. More cupboards equal more clutter being kept.

I'm assuming your DCs aren't going to live with you forever...
My mum thinks our new house is too small...3 double bedrooms and a box room for DP and I and 2 DDs - the bathroom is small, the kitchen not huge - but they are adequate (and we have a downstairs loo)
I think you can have too big a house...too much space.
I know someone who lives in a luxury house - with 2 DCs - 5 bedrooms all ensuite, family room, dining room, living room etc etc
She hates it - says impossible to keep clean, tends to be cold in winter, maintenance takes forever - she can't wait to get into somewhere smaller (waiting for divorce to go through)... .
Current house (slightly smaller than new one) has a massive bathroom -separate shower but no-one ever uses it while someone is in the bath! So two things to clean, and hard to keep warm in winter and has a convenient corner I often stick stuff in waiting to go into attic. And I am the queen of clutter - if I have the space I fill it ...Rest of house is overflowing - so much stuff I don't know where to start - my 'office' is a double bedroom a tiny area with desk and filing cabinets - rest is full of clutter, attic is scary, shed I trip over stuff - (new house has an attic and a big double garage...determined to keep room for at least one car in garage!) - planning a massive de-clutter before moving ...and now DCs are older they need less bulky stuff (prams etc)...
And in a few years (DD1 is 13) - I'll have a spare room...a few more years and I'll have 2!

Good point about cleaning and maintenance of a bigger house

Those that need to have clear outs are those likely to expand to fit the space, those who don't have regulate clear outs will certainly fill the space.

I hate clutter and stuff, no clear out needed as things get ditch as needed so no specific sessions needed.

Don't get me started on my DH and the garage, driveway and gardens. My standard response to his days doing the garage is that he wouldn't need to if he cleared up after himself. I find it hard to have empathy with that and his time keeping must try harder to be more understanding

We are moving in the next fortnight. Both bedrooms have built in wardrobes and part of my house budget included money for sufficient expedit storage lol! Having had the living room as my bedroom & dining area for years means that I'm desperate to have a "nice" living space that I can welcome unexpected visitors into at any time day or night.

My bookshelves will always expand to fill the available space, and friends have criticised me for this in the past but for me a home is not a home without books. I did a massive clear out of books before we moved, but am resigned to the fact the book collection will only grow again over time.

I'm a crafter but have mastered the art of decent storage - or that can get out of control before you blink. Homeschooling also means stuff that takes up space (practical learning projects) - I've looked at storage products for that.

Toddlers with all their bright chunky plastic make ANY space cluttered. My sibling has a 4 bed with 2 toddlers and her house looks just as cluttered as the one bed flat that DS & I shared once did. It's a phase that does eventually pass (providing you actually get rid of all the baby stuff and plastic tat).

Our lifestyle uses more "stuff" than a lot of people who aren't into arts and crafts, books or homeschooling, but I hope that lots of organised storage will prevent our new home looking like pack rat central in a few years.

Living in a small space for years trained me into looking thru DS's wardrobe every season and getting rid of ruined/outgrown clothes & shoes - all the outgrown stuff clutters a lot of homes. Noone wants thin kneed trousers or worn out shoes, though everyone is grateful for hand me downs in GOOD condition. Women's aid is a great place to give old children's stuff to as sadly so many women are forced to flee with just the clothes on their backs. This alleviates the emotional sense of loss if you are a natural hoarder. DS has sensory issues so occasionally I am able to donate brand new items he's been given as gifts without feeling as guilty as I would if they went anywhere else.

Actually I grew up in quite a big house...and my GPs had a farm and had sheds full (literally) of old stuff that might come in handy ...200 yrs+ of stuff - so I can see where I get my 'bad' habits from.
One of the best things for me was living in a tiny bedsit in my late teens...if I didn't put everything away and have a home for anything I couldn't have got in the door...
I kept the home for everything and hide things away mentality but still have a need to keep everything - rest of the house when I cba can be tidy - my office junk room is a lost cause...

I think it depends. I grew up in a house much bigger than the one I live in but it feels vry cramped despite the fact that only my parents live there now. But it's because my mum is the type of person who has got built in cupboards in every room and they are all filled to the brim with crap.

My house is smaller, four of us live here, but we like it tidy and uncluttered, so people often remark that our house seems much bigger than they exoected.

Could go either way really.

Oh, and also, my parents' house is a crap design, doesn't make good use of the space whereas our smaller house is very well designed.

When we moved to our present house it seemed really big compared to our last one. But another baby and we needed an extension. Now it seems absolutely tiny and nowhere to put anything. Though it's an average sized house but does lack storage. I agree with decluttering. As nowhere will ever be big enough if you keep too much clutter.

My top tip would be when you are packing up to move: anything you know you haven't touched/used since you last unpacked it, or that you cannot remember using in the last year, put in a different box and either sell/give/throw away. Don't unpack it again to be stored and forgotten in the next house just to pack into a box again the next time you move!

Storage is they key but if it is full of stuff you never use and will never use, it's just wasted space. Unless it's an expensive thing, keeping it 'just in case' isn't worth it (IMO!).

Sentimental keepsakes are the only exception, which should be kept together in appropriate storage, but again, be a bit ruthless where you can, and make something of them of you are going to keep them (eg scrapbook rather than little bits of paper/tickets/photos left loose). If you can't be bothered to spend the effort doing that, possibly you don't care that much about the things...

Don't let children help, in my experience they are all mini hoarders!