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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to think this is really selfish

33 replies

medic78 · 28/05/2014 16:09

so we are on holiday and are cosleeping with an 20 month old. dd was quire restless the 1st night so neither of us got much sleep. last nigh dh swapped with dd1 so had a fab nights sleep on his own. he than lounged around in that room slill 9.15. by than I was having a shower with dd in room with me.
he than came and got toddler dd out of shower room. A nice gesture until he came in wanting sex. dd was crying the other sideaibu to think this is bang out of order.

OP posts:
ManchesterAunt · 28/05/2014 16:14

Urgh, yanbu.

LittleprincessinGOLDrocks · 28/05/2014 16:15

It is wrong of him to leave his DD to cry in that way, but that would be unreasonable no matter where he slept the night before.
So he is being unreasonable there.
As for the sleeping arrangements can you swap tonight so you get a night of peace?
Then as for the sex, settle DD to sleep then have your fun!

NiceCupOfTeaAndAPartyRing · 28/05/2014 16:15

YADNBU

LittleprincessinGOLDrocks · 28/05/2014 16:18

YANBU by the way.

whois · 28/05/2014 16:22

Tell him you would be much more turned on if you had had a good nights sleep!

hellsbellsmelons · 28/05/2014 16:27

I am Shock at this TBH.
Are there other things he expects and demands?
How old are you both?

Meeeep · 28/05/2014 16:27

Yeugh, just yeugh

maras2 · 28/05/2014 16:28

What an absolute pig.

Cluffyflump · 28/05/2014 16:31

Ewwww!
How gross.
Could anyone get the horn whilst their own child is crying?!

JustWonderingAbout · 28/05/2014 16:43

Awful

ThinkIveBeenHacked · 28/05/2014 17:16

Urg thats quite bad.

Hope you get the good nights sleep tonight and he is on dd duty

Original poster
medic78 · 28/05/2014 18:54

she still breastfeeds so I never get a night off a holiday lie in would be good we are both late 30's. I told him no of course

OP posts:
EmmanuelWoganberry · 28/05/2014 19:17

What an arse.

Original poster
medic78 · 29/05/2014 08:19

an update. he slept with ds againvlast night and still hasn't surfaced. although given what I now now the same holiday accomodation is too close.
The day before yesterday we stopped at a supermarket for provisions. I went in whilst he stayed in car with dc. I apparently took to long so (d)h apparently said to the kids that I spend too long in supermarkets and buy too much and thats why I am fat. He said he was going to drive off and make me walk. Ok I amvobese size 20 but that hurt like hell. I think our marriage is over. He clearly has no regard for my emototional health or the dcs. my 8 year old ds is already saying he wishes his legs were thinner. I am morrtified and livid in equal measures.

OP posts:
Coconutty · 29/05/2014 08:25

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
medic78 · 29/05/2014 08:30

saturdat we have 2cars so I am rwmptes to taje toddlerand drive home todat

OP posts:
Tangerinefairy · 29/05/2014 08:33

Oh god he is awful! I'm so sorry. You really don't need a nasty selfish prick like him in your life. So sorry though, what a "holiday"!

AliceDoesntLiveHereAnymore · 29/05/2014 08:54

medic - that is awful. There's no reason for him to speak this way to you and he certainly shouldn't be saying these things in front of the children.

I think a private chat with him regarding the inappropriateness of his comments and that he needs to treat you with respect would be in order. If he cannot do that, then I would seriously consider taking a car and leaving with the DCs. (leaving both the holiday and possibly the marriage)

attheendoftheday · 29/05/2014 08:55

Honestly ltb. He sounds like a prick and you sound kind.

hellsbellsmelons · 29/05/2014 08:57

Late 30's!?
I really thought you were going to say early 20's.
You know you do not have to put up with awful treatment of you.
You deserve more and better than this.
Go home. Get some head space and really think about where you want your life to be in 5 years time.
Still with this vile human being?? I doubt that.

This really sounds like emotional abuse and bullying to me.
You could contact Womens Aid and speak to them to get a clearer picture.

I really do hope you start to see things more clearly (which I think you already are which is why you posted) and can make good decisions now for yourself and for your DC.

Dropdeadfred2 · 29/05/2014 08:59

I would go home..but why would you not take both dc? Sorry that your husband is so awful...he sounds very selfish and cruel

Meeeep · 29/05/2014 09:01

Ignore his comments about your appearance. He was trying to shag you in the shower yesterday so quite obviously he does not find you unattractive and is just being a prize prick. He is the one who sounds unattractive in this entire story but he's being such a cunt.

Truthfully if I were you I think I would go home early too. I don't think I would want to be around a man who appears to have so little regard for your feelings.

xvxvxvxvxvxvxvxv · 29/05/2014 11:57

Yuck
Your child is crying and he wants sex?
Yuck yuck yuck yuck what a slimy twat.

xvxvxvxvxvxvxvxv · 29/05/2014 11:59

You're not too fat for him to want to ignore a crying child to have sex with you though.
Get rid.

HannerHet · 29/05/2014 13:18

Vile. LTB