AIBU to worry about where I can live in UK because my DH and DD are not white British

[BlinkMissed]

Name changed for this as just want an MN perspective on this matter. I have a colleague who didn't know my partner is not white and my daughter is mixed (although her skin tone is quite fair) who recently moved out of london to Hertfordshire and was shocked that on her street, an Indian family moved in. She wasn't particularly nasty but just said it was a white area and I got the impression it is why she moved there in first place. Do I have to worry about this kind of thing? My DH says it's would be hard for him to live in a place where there was no diversity and when we have been on holiday to Greece for example, he says he gets stared at for not being white.

Sadly yes, this is something I also now have to consider.

Sadly, OP, there are idiots everywhere and you can't screen for that on first contact/moving into an area. However, I am saying that as a white british who seriously hopes the rest of the UK are not racist idiots. When I try to put myself in your shoes and imagine moving into a predominantly Indian/black/green little alien area, I admit I feel uneasy about standing out. I can see where your partner is coming from.

Me and DH are different races and even in the US we stick to areas that have a diverse population. Although, in our state race really isn't an issue in any part, but he doesn't like feeling like the token minority iykwim.

Op we have just moved to herts from a v multi cultural part of London. Ds are black, dd mixed, dh White. We chose this area because of the family support we've got locally from MIL etc

I like you was worried. There are v few black families here but certainly more than there used to be when dh and I started dating 7 years ago.

Anyway I must say that I'm so shocked at how welcome we've been made to feel. I've made many friends and so have my dc. We've had I think 3 or so incidents of race related name Calling at school or Football which were dealt with swiftly and pretty harshly. But overall it's been a good move for us.

However we are at the far end of herts just before cambridgeshire begins. I do believe there is a belt just outside of London, inc herts that can be a bit racist because people feel they've had to move away from multi cultural London for their own reasons and therefore don't expect or want to see that diversity anymore

I can give you and long term view of Herts especially the Hoddesdon/Cheshunt side.
When I grew up 70's &80's it was very rare to see a non white person, at senior school there was probably 2-5 per year group, there was a noticable change when I was in my teens/early 20's and my old school is now very ethnically diverse and not white.
Hoddesdon and the Lea Valley have always had a diverse population because of the plant and produce growing nurseries but the diversity was firstly Italian (Hoddesdon is nicknamed little Italy) and now Eastern European so mainly white.
Further out in the smaller market towns and villages, non whites are still less common, but are treated well as part of the community.

I'm in South London. I'm an ethnic minority in my electoral ward but I'm white.

DH is mixed race as are my children (though one of mine looks and identifies as white). Where we live every second child is biracial. Nigerian/Scottish, Senegalese/Vietnamese, Bajan/English, Indian/Ghanian. It's how the future looks!

I wouldn't live outside of London with my children.

Where I live there is very little diversity. It's a small market town in the South. There is a social club here for people from ethnic minorities. I come from London so find it really odd. I didn't notice it until we moved here. I've never seen/heard any overt racism. I think there are about 3 Asian dc in dd's year group of 60. Yet ten miles down the road is a city with a very diverse population.

Its not unreasonable of you to take the ethnic makeup of an area into account when thinking about where to live, since it will affect how you are seen/treated.

It's sad that you have to think of this, but it's not unreasonable of you to think of it.

I'm white British and was in the minority at my last address. My neighbours were mostly Asian with one polish family and one Italian. So there are areas with predominant races but it doesn't mean you can't live there.

Dh is mixed race and I am white, we grew up in a small town in the midlands (his family is from Hertfordshire). The town was very white and DH was the only obviously non white kid in our year at school. We now live in lancashire in a small, mostly white town.

Dh have never suffered any racism anywhere and the only racism I have ever suffered was from someone I met online.

Moving to a white area doesn't necessarily mean that your family will suffer any kind of racism.

I don't think you're in the least unreasonable to be concerned, and to research the ethnic profile of an area before moving. I think anyone who thinks it's no longer an issue is leading a very sheltered life.

I moved out of a very ethnically diverse bit of London to a village not far from a large, very ethnically-diverse provincial city. The village is entirely white, but the village school has a good reputation and hence has lots of children from outside the village attending, and I've been shocked numerous times by the explicit anti-Asian racism in comments about the school having gone downhill. The village post office is run by a lovely Asian couple, and when I first arrived, I assumed they lived in the village. When they got to know me better, they admitted they had rented in the village briefly, felt they weren't accepted, so they commute daily from the city, and send their children to school there.

'White flight' from the ethnically-mixed city to the surrounding villages is very noticeable around here. And it's not even that the wealthy of all races choose to move out into the more expensive villages - it's clear that wealthy Asians cluster in certain areas of the city, but do not move out of it, and although the city is surrounded by beautiful countryside, I could count on my fingers the number of non-white people of any race I have seen at pick your own farms, National Trust properties, county shows, farm parks etc, though these things are within seven or eight miles of the city.