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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to not always wash the bedding between MiL visits

37 replies

MoreHoursInTheDay · 19/05/2014 18:48

My in-laws visit for a couple of nights every few weeks, and I don't always wash the bedding in-between.

I know my MiL has a thing about this because she once criticised (to me) her other son's wife for the same thing when they had kids and we didn't. Also, on the day of leaving she always asks me if I would like her to strip the bed, even though I always say "no thankyou", whether I plan to wash the bedding or not, because I don't want to feel pressurised into doing it immediately.

AIBU? I don't think so. I just wanted to sound off because I find it frustrating.

OP posts:
londonrach · 19/05/2014 18:49

Depends. Mil comes for one day every so often so I don't every time. She informed me not to as i life in flat and hard to dry things....

SaucyJack · 19/05/2014 18:51

If the good Lord had wanted you to change the sheets every time, then He would not have invented Febreeze.

starfishmummy · 19/05/2014 18:54

As long as no one else has slept in there between their visits then yanbu.
But if Mil wants clean sheets then when she asks if she should strip the bed say "yes please and can you out them in the washer on number 4".
Then when they're done just fold neatly and leave on the bed for Mil to make up when she arrives.

RussellBrandsEyeliner · 19/05/2014 18:55

SaucyJack Grin

Nunyabiz · 19/05/2014 18:56

Are they the only ones who sleep in the spare bed?
I change all bedding once a week (or rather- the cleaner does Blush)
But I would hate to sleep in a bed at someone's house that had previously had other people in it without being washed... Some people sleep naked. Some people fart a lot. Some people sweat a lot... Lol
But if it's just them in the bed every time and it's only a couple of days they stay I would leave it on for 2 or more visits!

SconeRhymesWithGone · 19/05/2014 18:57

Grin at Saucy

If it is only a couple of nights and the same person is sleeping in the bed next visit, I do not change the sheets.

trixymalixy · 19/05/2014 18:57

Yanbu

Nunyabiz · 19/05/2014 18:57

Oops x post starfish but I think we are on the same page

TooLongInTheBog · 19/05/2014 18:57

Normal bed change is every week, so if someone is staying for two days a week, then it's reasonable to change it after, say, six sleeps, or every three weeks.

(As long as nobody else is sleeping in them in between-times.)

jacks365 · 19/05/2014 18:58

I would because I don't leave bedding that long but I wash my own weekly.

littlegreengloworm · 19/05/2014 18:59

Saucy has made my day.., ha ha I need you in real life to sort things out ! :)

I probably would use a sheet and top sheet and just change them and the pillowcases. But I would get dh to do them ... Lol...

SconeRhymesWithGone · 19/05/2014 19:06

I live in the US and we don't do the duvet-cover-as-top-sheet thing much in this country. If I had to stuff one of those buggers with a duvet every time someone came to stay, I'd be looking for the Febreeze myself.

Nancy66 · 19/05/2014 19:10

if there are weeks between visits then I do think it's a bit scuzzy to not change the sheets.

it's not that much hassle is it?

CaptainTripps · 19/05/2014 22:31

Not scuzzy at all.

Same bed residents so same sheets can be used. They won't implode with bacteria.

As an aside - are we, as a nation, overly obsessed with washing? I do think we over-wash our linen and clothes.

EverythingsDozy · 19/05/2014 22:34

I'm sure Kim and Aggie recommended changing bed sheets every two weeks. But that could be because some of the people on How Clean is Your House probably wouldn't do it more often!

cerealqueen · 19/05/2014 22:37

YANBU, I wouldn't either, I would air the room well and give her fresh pillowcases!

Ludways · 19/05/2014 22:38

I don't change the sheets every time stepdd stays, she's usually here 3 nights do I do alternate visits (have even been know to forget and do it after 3, shhh!)

CorusKate · 19/05/2014 22:42

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

SanityClause · 19/05/2014 22:42

If she's only slept on them for three nights, and will be using them again soon, then that's fine, I would say.

My PIL come to stay with us before they go on holiday, and then afterwards, so that we can take them to the airport. I never wash the sheets in between.

If someone else was going to use the bed in the meantime, that would be different.

NormHonal · 19/05/2014 22:49

My parents stay every 4-6 weeks with us, for a night or two each time. I used to be quite strict about washing the bedding every time, but my DMum (bless her!) ordered me not to, and now I let them use the sheets twice before I change them.

(DMum has been known to bring her own bedding and towels and tell me she is doing so when she knows I am particularly busy or stressed.)

Sometimes I might just do the fitted sheets and pillowcases, but not the duvet cover, which is the biggest PITA. Sheets and pillowcases are easy to do and often all you need to clean anyway.

If it were the PILs I definitely would wash in-between though.

nochips01 · 19/05/2014 22:52

In the situation the OP describes I think that employing the shake and turn approach to the duvet is more than fine.

Scuttlebutter · 19/05/2014 22:59

I would (and do) always wash the bedding after a guest has stayed in our house. The bed has to be stripped, and it's no bother to do that and their towels. I would change my own bed twice a week in hot weather so a three day weekend with two adults in it - yes, definitely needs changing.

Ludways · 19/05/2014 23:36

Twice a week, I'd have to wash 8 lots of bedding every week. I don't have time for that!

HayDayQueen · 19/05/2014 23:43

Corus - just the one pillowcase?? Shock

What the hell did he do to that pillow?????

CorusKate · 19/05/2014 23:48

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.