To use these things for second baby?

[dramajustfollowsme]

I know I am a hoarder at heart. Growing up with my mum who was down to her last pennies because Dad was FA definitely resulted in me keeping things "just in case."
However, I have improved and have had a few big clear outs.
I kept all of Dd's baby clothes unless stained or stretched or bobbly.
Bibs I've kept unless really badly stained. I've kept all the muslins as I figure they are just used to mop up sick anyway.
Dd2 is due in a few weeks and I've got the stuff out and been washing it all. MiL keeps nothing. New everything, every season, including gardening equipment.
She says I should have thrown all this stuff and baby toys, gym, playmat and jumperoo, out and buy all new. She also makes the point that the baby will get presents so I don't need to keep all the old things.
I say, the stuff is expensive and perfectly usable again. Do people really not use things again for subsequent children?
I would rather wait and see what, if anything we get as gifts then take it from there.
I just hate the idea of throwing them out and spending a fortune again.
She also went mental when she discovered that I keep doubles of gifts dd receive and re-gift them. I put £10 in her bankie each time I re-gift something. Apparently they are all her toys and she should get them all. No child needs 3 of the same dolls, imo.
I am just not sure if I am right or if my background is making me keep things unnecessarily.

[mandi73]

I call DD3 my second hand baby, nothing of hers is new except for what Santa brought her at Christmas.
Pram from a friend
Cot from a FB selling page
High chair FB selling page
Car seat already had
Clothes my sil gave me
Toys from DD2
Bottles and nappies were new :)
Don't think she noticed nothing was new :)

Your MIL would hate me :)

[MrsSpencerReid]

YANBU haven't read every post but I do exactly as you do, I even bought second hand stuff for my first born

[BikeRunSki]

I agree that your MiL is nuts and also incredibly wasteful. I would like to take her to a landfill site and tell her " you don't throw stuff away... There is no away".

FWIW I used muslins and cloth nappies that my mum used on me and my siblings. DS's bed was my grandfather's and DD's bed has been in constant use by the under 5s of my circle of friends for 19 years. I think she's the 7th occupant.

(Both dc have had new mattresses!)

[LittleBearPad]

You sound utterly normal.

Your mil considerably less so.

Congratulations.

[HungryHorace]

She's bonkers! And so wasteful.

I had DD last year and am having DC2 this summer. Whatever sex DC2 is, they'll wear the babygrows we bought / were given for DD.

We've bought new babygrows / hats for first and going home outfits, and we have needed another cot bed etc, but I'll re-use as much as possible.

If DC2 is a boy I'll sell / swap the girl's clothes I have and buy secondhand clothes for DS.

[Lanabelle]

Oh dear lord, your MiL sounds bonkers. All new everything - pfft. I like to reuse too and love the sentimental things that can be handed down too.

[andream34]

You have a lot of common sense...whereas the MIL appears to have lost hers somewhere long the way. Re-use makes perfect sense, everything just seems to get more expensive as the years pass anyway.

If you end up with something that you really don't ever think you will be able to use, then you could also take it to a charity shop... and then someone else, who may be able to afford very little, will benefit from it.

[CPtart]

DS2 has re-used DS1 clothes, toys, beds, bikes, football boots, etc etc etc. There is very little he has had brand new, he is none the worse for it and we have saved a fortune. He is almost 9 and is still known as "Mr cast off" and is actually far less demanding of things generally than his brother.
YADNBU.

[coffeetofunction]

Every time she sees baby tell her how terrible expensive the new outfit if that the baby is wearing, bet she never realises otherwise

[missuswife]

YANBU. Your MIL is nuts. I'm a reverse hoarder, having loads of stuff sitting around makes me anxious and I'm always taking things to the charity shop, however I have saved all dd's outgrown toys and clothes for future dc. No point filling landfills and/or spending needlessly to replace it all, that is simply crackers!

[RobinSparkles]

Are you heck unreasonable! Your MIL is batshit crazy!

DD2 was and still is a secondhand rose. Most of DD1's things were pristine.

DD2 had DD1's old cot, Moses basket, wardrobe, changer unit, baby walker, jumperoo, clothes - everything except pram as I walk a lot and it was knackered and mattresses as you have to have new for a new baby.

Why on earth wouldn't you?

[SchnitzelVonKrumm]

Your MIL is nuts. My DC love wearing the older ones hand me downs.

[MewlingQuim]

Desperately trying to think of something we had for dd that wasn't second or third or fourth hand......

Nope. Can't think of a single thing.

[Ragwort]

Agree with everyone else, your MIL is barking, we had everything passed down or second hand for our PFB. We could have easily bought everything brand new but wouldn't dream of it.

Interestingly I volunteer in a charity shop and we have beautiful, nicely presented baby and childrens' clothes (designer labels) but it is incredibly hard to sell them (even at rock bottom prices) - I just don't understand why people don't buy second hand stuff for children. My SIL is like that, she just wouldn't ever consider buying anything second hand for her children - fortunately she passes her stuff on to my DS .

(note - DH and I only wear charity shop stuff ourselves).

[dramajustfollowsme]

Thanks CarbeDiem!
I was beginning to think I was odd as Mil and SiL would never ever keep things. Both say it is mainly because they have no room to keep things. I do think it is incredibly sad that my nieces and nephews have no toys from baby years at all bar one teddy each.
I love to make do and mend, if clothing/bedding is really unusable I give it to the rag man!
I am probably not going to work for a couple of years after this baby is born so we are trying to save money anyway we can.
I greatly admire how my mum managed on the pittance my dad gave her. I just don't see the point of getting rid of stuff if I still may need it.
We won't be having more children so she will be delighted that I will be shipping things out to new homes when we are finished with them. Apart from books, being a primary teacher, I cannot bear to give away books. Dd has quite a few that were my favourites growing up. I hope to keep her favourites so she can share them with her kids.

[kate1516]

I used mostly hand me downs for my DS that my SIL's were kind enough to give me. Perfectly usable. Babies only wear clothes a few months and there is always a lot more life in them. I think your MIL is a bit nuts and seems a huge waste to me to buy all new every time. I would buy a few pieces you love for the new baby but use the old stuff too.

[Ronmione]

Throw away a jumperoo!!! No never. I used mine for both my cd then stuck on eBay and got £50

[Ronmione]

*dc

[Pobblewhohasnotoes]

Does she actually throw everything away or charity shop it?

[dimdommilpot]

YANBU
I had dd2 3wk ago, i kept EVERYTHING from dd1, ive hardly spent a penny this time round. Though today i counted 0-3m sleepsuits whilst washing them, dd2 has 43!!!

[CarbeDiem]

I love to make do and mend
Me too. It just doesn't make sense to me and obviously to so many posters here, to not use something again.
You are not odd and I hope, from the agreement of fellow posters, that you can see that it's your mil and sil who are 100% bonkers.

[ifyourehoppyandyouknowit]

She would have had conniptions if she had seen my DS in babygrows/outfits that had been used for all five of my DSis' babies beforehand!

[enormouse]

YANBU, but I guess you already know that by now.

I kept most of DS1s stuff for DS2 (only a 2 year age gap so most things were fine). I only bought new vests/babygros if DS1s had gone bobbly or grey. Same steriliser, gym, crib and cot. New buggy though as my old mothercare one fell apart after a particularly strong gust of wind.

DS1 was a spoilt first grandson so had stuff which had barely been worn or was quite expensive.
He was given a beautiful me to you tatty teddy snowsuit which I am so glad to be able to reuse for DS2. I've never seen another one like it.

[NeedsAsockamnesty]

Bonkers.

My baby is currently wearing a nappy that was first brought 22 years ago and a very cool lady bird baby gro that has so far been worn by 9 other baby's

[smartypants1000]

Just about to re-use everything for dc4 here. How silly of your MIL. Also, people don't tend to buy as many baby clothes as presents for subsequent children in my experience as they think you'll already have everything you need.