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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To not give my personal details to this woman?

36 replies

OldVikingDudeHidMyTubeSocks · 04/05/2014 20:51

and if not, how the fuck do I get out of it??

A good few weeks ago as I was coming out of school after drop off one of the mothers of a childin my DS class came running (rather fast) past me to get into a car.
After doing a sort of weird avoidance manoeuvre whilst running in order not to crash into me she went, quite literally arse over tit.

I did the usual polite asking if she was ok, is she sure? etc etc and she just mumbled that she was and got into the car - I assume she was rather embarrassed.

About a week or so later, while waiting for kick out time, she was talking about her fall and showed us her leg, it was horrendous, huge bruise like nothing i'd seen before.

Fast forward to last week and she came up to me and told me she wanted my details for 'the compensation claim' I told her I didn't know my mobile number off the top of my head and she just said 'hand them into the school and they'll pass them on'

Now I really don't want to do this.
Firstly she didn't trip over anything, there is nothing wrong with the pavement outside of the school and tbh she was running pretty fucking fast and rather erratically. So even if I did give details all im going to say is 'she was runnin g fast and fell over...

Plus (and this is going to sound really petty) I don't really like her! The first time I ever really became aware of her was when her son came running out with a card he'd mde her saying 'mummy, mummy I madeyou a card' and she just huffed and said he'd spelled something wrong!

How long do you think I can keep up benign thoughtlessness on the passing on of details?

Apologies for length.

OP posts:
kukeslala · 04/05/2014 20:53

I would just say to her, I don't know what help you would be to her claim when she was the one at fault...

SauvignonBlanche · 04/05/2014 20:54

Don't give your details to her, give them to the school and tell them the truth.

HecatePropylaea · 04/05/2014 20:54

Can I ask why you don't just pass on your details and tell the truth to whoever asks you for information?

Yeah she fell, she was running fast, no I didn't see anything wrong with the pavement.

Original poster
OldVikingDudeHidMyTubeSocks · 04/05/2014 20:56

That's what I was thinking Hecate. I just wondered if you lot had any good ideas of avoidance!

I'd do it grudgingly because she does rather grate on my nerves.

OP posts:
BlackDaisies · 04/05/2014 20:58

Just say you'd be no good as a witness as you didn't actually see her trip over anything, just that she fell as she swerved round you. Just look all confused and add that you're sorry you can't help her. If it comes to it, refuse to give your number.

Original poster
OldVikingDudeHidMyTubeSocks · 04/05/2014 20:58

also im wondering if there's a limit a to what personal details I give. Could I get away with full name and mobile number or would I have to give more?

OP posts:
HecatePropylaea · 04/05/2014 20:59

Why do you want to avoid?

If it is because you think that you would be helping her by giving her the details - you wouldn't. You'd be saying that she tripped over her own feet on a pavement with no hazards because she wasn't looking where she was going.

you'd be more likely to prevent her claim being successful than helping it to be.

Bloodyteenagers · 04/05/2014 21:00

When she asks again I would ask her why she wanted my details for her fall and who was she suing and why because it was her own fault. Not sure why you want my number, but of course they need witnesses to know you were running like a loon.

Original poster
OldVikingDudeHidMyTubeSocks · 04/05/2014 21:00

Good idea Black but when she was showing off her bruises I sid something along the lines of 'yeah that fall looked really nasty, you really came a cropper!' so faux confusion wont wash unfortunately.

OP posts:
Coldlightofday · 04/05/2014 21:01

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Finney2 · 04/05/2014 21:01

Yes give her your details then tell the truth. It will help whoever she is trying to 'claim' against.

gamerchick · 04/05/2014 21:01

Tell her to knob off.

BlackDaisies · 04/05/2014 21:01

She's not trying to blame you is she?

LurkAndLearn · 04/05/2014 21:02

Who is she claiming against? I would be cooperative but say it as you saw it.

Whether you like her or not is irrelevant really.

gamerchick · 04/05/2014 21:03

You don't know if she wants to sue you never mind anybody else. Let the school know you will be a witness for them or for the council if she goes for them.

Bloody compensation bollocks. . Royally gets on my norks.

gamerchick · 04/05/2014 21:04

Xposts

cozietoesie · 04/05/2014 21:04

I'd hand in something basic to the school, I think. Apart from anything else, if you don't, you might find pressure being put on the two boys to obtain them from you. That would be unfortunate.

Original poster
OldVikingDudeHidMyTubeSocks · 04/05/2014 21:04

I want to avoid because quite frankly it's a pain in the arse assle that I can't be arsed with plus I know she'll be expecting me to substantiate her claim rather than tell the truth! I know that whatever I say if I did give details wouldn't be in support of her or of any help to her.

OP posts:
cozietoesie · 04/05/2014 21:07

You could always write out a statement of what you remember in advance and have it ready for anyone who asks.

Summerbreezing · 04/05/2014 21:08

I agree with others on here. Tell her you're happy to give contact details but as far as you are concerned there was no one else liable for the fall and that's all you will be saying, that you're not prepared to say you witnessed anything that you didn't actually see.

WhereYouLeftIt · 04/05/2014 21:08

"Fast forward to last week and she came up to me and told me she wanted my details for 'the compensation claim' I told her I didn't know my mobile number off the top of my head and she just said 'hand them into the school and they'll pass them on'"
Could you just approach her and ask for more details about 'the compensation claim' such as who she's actually claiming against? Because I'd be wondering if she was going to be claiming against me.

Original poster
OldVikingDudeHidMyTubeSocks · 04/05/2014 21:13

ok. next time she tells me she wnts my details (no polite asking roun these here parts nowadays Hmm) I'll ask who the claim is against first because im all of a sudden paranoid it could be against me! Grin

then i'll give my name and number and just honestly say what happened whenever im contacted.

Good plan thanks you lot. Grin

OP posts:
deakymom · 04/05/2014 21:18

okay give the details in and when they ring for your version tell them the truth and that you would like them not to tell her it was you they will just put the claim as unfounded and not pay her

DeWee · 04/05/2014 21:23

I hate people trying to get compensation when it's their own fault. So I would happily give my details, and be totally explicit when contacted that it was entirely her own fault. I would totally enjoy saying "she wasn't looking where she was going and tripped over her own feet". Grin

cozietoesie · 04/05/2014 21:26

Actually, as the two women were coming out of a school it's most likely going to be against the council or the school authority (H&S outside schools/traffic and pedestrian measures/that sort of thing) and if so, she'll likely get a modest sum pretty automatically from their insurance carriers or from them directly. If she's signed up with an ambulance chaser, they'll usually pay out on no-merit claims just to have them out of the way and because it's cheaper than hiring lawyers to fight them.

I believe £5k or £6k is about the going rate?

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