To stupid things to people when In new social situations?

[Chocoholism]

I don't really feel I fit in too well in a mum and baby group I go to but I kept going for the sake of my DD to mingle with other babies too. My DD is 20 weeks and ive been going for 6 weeks or so, I find myself saying awkward silly things that either don't make much sense or make me sound like a nutcase. I burst out saying I would've punched someone if they upset me the way that they did the story teller of whatever it was they said. I wouldn't punch anyone ever!!
Maybe I should stop going, I find myself talking in my telephone best voice too. ( thinks of phoebe in friends meeting mikes parents)

I have no idea how people manage to not act bizarre in front of new people, so don’t worry you’re not alone. I tend to get very cockney.

Gosh, no help but I can relate to this.

I get nervous and say daft things. Often put myself out there too much by telling everyone a daft story which comes back to bite me later on.

I've found the best thing is to say as little as possible, I'd rather be the quiet one.

They probably haven't noticed and may be feeling awkward themselves!

I used the word "tussock" today in conversation, a word I have quite possibly never said out loud before. I just walked away thinking "tussock? WTF?"

Don't worry though, people are too concerned about themselves to notice you!

I am the queen of saying the inappropriate/downright bizarre in any social situation, especially when I'm drunk nervous.

This is why I don't really 'do' people.

Well to be fair if you are doing these things you are isolating yourself already. I would find this very weird behaviour.

Why are you so self-conscious, OP? It's not as if a baby group is a job interview or some kind of party where you are expected to be groomed and highly conversationally impressive! Is it not the case that everyone is just glad to get out of the house and mutter unambitiously to another adult?

Why is anyone self conscious? I don't think it's something I chose to be or feel like

I can so relate. I am very awkward in social situations. Trying harder just seems to make me more anxious and behave even more awkwardly!

I can relate to this op. I'm quite shy and talk quietly so don't tend to say much at all, often when I do speak it comes out wrong and I think I come across a bit odd and timid. I try to remember that there'll be others thinking the same as me.

I often get my words muddled .. then realise when people look at me funny , or saythe opposite i.e. 'yesterday' rather than 'tomorrow'.. but i know what i mean.. its got worse as ive got older,.. i think its just that my thoughts are ahead of what i say ,

But i do have a reputation for just coming out with what i think sometimes .. My current work collegues have told me that they think i have Asbergers or tourettes ( and i think the boss beleives them .. nice eh?)

But One of the worse..

I was in a job interview and the woman chief executive said .'Im really not very good at remembering appointments , what would you do to help me remember them ?'.. I said all the usual things, diary, appointment book, white board, list on her desk, text to remind ect.. but then she said 'But yes but id probably just ignore all that , so what would you do in that case.? ' . I just said what first came into my head.. , 'well id probably just have to shake you until you remembered to remember'.. I didnt get the job .. ( but really....what did she expect? )

I answered the phone the other day and said 'telephone pole' (actually i dont think they noticed!)..

I get horribly tongue tied if I'm nervous. Especially if I have to make a phone call.

It's all very well for those that don't have this problem to say 'how weird' but it is really limiting. And it isn't something you can just stop.

I'm not trying to be unpleasant. OP. I can be as self-conscious as the next person when it's a situation where I am supposed to impress, and where saying something wild would be disastrous. But I would have said a baby group was a fairly safe, low-key space, where everyone was knackered and unlikely to notice other new parents talking gibberish...?

I once burst into tears at a baby yoga group because I was so exhausted and because the teacher had brought everyone a cup of tea, right to where we were sitting with cranky three month olds. No one turned a hair. A couple of people cried along in sympathy!

laska I love that, really made me chuckle! That is something I would say for sure!
burren thank you, I didn't think you was unpleasant, I think I feel like I don't fit in well with the mums, they are all really nice but if I'm honest they are all much more educated than me, doctors, lawyers, they have privately educated children and talk about things I'm not even sure about! (Thinks of Joey in friends (again) when he buys the encyclopaedia for words beginning with V). I know that's sad and all my problem but I still can't help it!

I'm the same. I normally open with labour stories (always a winner), then can chat about poo, sick and various bodily functions. However when I'm on placement I am amazing at small talk and can aimlessly chat about anything. Babies/children drain my social skills!

BrianButterfield I need to know how you got the word "tussock" into a conversation?!!

Chocoholism don't judge yourself so harshly, you do have a shared inerest with the others at the baby group, your babies and from there you can idly chat about other shared interests, keep it light, don't think you have to say something profound.

Or you could insert "tussock" into a conversation and totally floor them with your Shakespearean sounding language skills "I tussock thee heartily!"

Oh i'm the same OP. I tend to be the quiet one in groups of new people. (I'm so NOT quiet at heart).

Then, when the moment finally takes me to speak up, everyone tends to pay rather close attention and i'm like a rabbit in the headlights. And i ramble .... and waffle ... start to stumble over things like my DHs name, and then totally forget the point of what i was going to say at all! All with everyone paying closer and closer bemused attention. And i come off as a complete nutter

Hehehe maybe I should do that emotionsecho!
That would be so tussock!

The other thing i do is start a story that has no real point to it in the end. Strange thing is that although I'm self conscious there, my inner chatterbox always wants to show itself but I too babble/waffle away too much

Well now you have to tell us Indians!

Yes Indians if you can tell strangers at a wedding then you can tell us!

You are just getting used to being a mother.
Be yourself.
Do not get forced into anything you do not want to be.