To think wearing clothes from a different culture is NOT cultural appropriation

[MrsMystery]

When I'm at home, I'm regularly in a salwar kameez, they are pretty, comfortable and lightweight. I'm not Asian btw.

SIL has pointed out to me that what I am doing is cultural appropriation

AIBU to think she's nuts?

"Aphrodite Nefertiti O'Brien" - superb! what a shame it is not real.

When I was in India I bought some lovely salwar kameezes ( ha ha predictive text just came up with 'lame exes'!)

They were great to wear in a hot country and Indian people were delighted I was wearing them as they saw it as a sign of respect to their culture. I would love to wear them in the UK but I suspect I would get a lot of ( racist ) disapproval from some white people if I did..:(

Your SIL is an arse. Wear what you want!

If you are wearing something - be it a sari/kimono/hairdo whatever ... Surely it is a mark of respect for the other culture as you like their garments/style enough to want to emulate it?

I wear Indian/Pakistani/Chinese/Swedish jewellery all of the time because I love them. It doesn't mean I am appropriating their culture.

Sometimes people look for racism when there's nothing there.

Aphrodite Nefertiti O'Brien

DSs name is Spartan, Latin, Cypriot, Saxon-Norman. We're just spreading our colonial dominance all over the shop. Or it could be that as a nation of mongrels we just love a bit of everything!

To those doubting the CIS definition, in can mean sex or skin colour apparently - this is what I've read from being a stalker on Tumblr anyway. Maybe they were using it wrong.. I dunno but if so it's literally 100's of people so maybe its taken on more meaning?

Regardless, it's used as a derogatory name everytime I've seen it which isn't on.

'Cis' is Latin meaning 'on this side' as opposed to 'trans' meaning 'on the other side'.

I cans see it could be used to refer to someone who identified racially with the race they appear to be. It seems unnecessarily complicated to me, though, just as it does re. gender.

Oh that's interesting LRD thanks for that, I've always read it meant 'Comfortable In Skin'.

No worries. It originally referred to geography - like 'on this side of the hill' as opposed to 'on that side'. But I think in modern terms it's always used to mean 'comfortable in skin', though I've only heard it with gender until now.

I don't understand why 'comfortable in skin' is an insult, after all, it's used as a compliment for people who are comfortable on their own skin. Odd way of insulting people of you think about it!

Well, you learn something new every day - I'm a chemist and have only ever come across cis in the context of cis isomers - with the meaning LRD indicates of 'on the same side' whereas trans is' on opposite sides.'. Trans-fats, trans-pennine, transgender.... but never cis outside of chemistry before. Totally OT but I'm pleased by the notion that I had a cis-pennine walk today

I'm not Asian but bought two cotton shalwar khameez in India and wore them until they fell apart I got too fat to fit into them. You can do that in London without SILs getting uptight. Now one of DS's friends (aged 20) wears the trousers!

I loved them. Used to wear them for flying. Got stopped by customs every time

Nursey, is it not possible that the people who were disagreeing with you for dressing as Mulan were accusing you of both a. being a white person who was culturally appropriating an Asian culture and b. being cis (as in not being trans) you were culturally appropriating a gender non conforming character (as Mulan I think swaps between acting as a girl and acting as a boy).

I've never heard cis used socially to mean anything other than not transgender.

As in 'OMG a white cishet dressed up as genderqueer POC character!'

Cis and trans were pinched off the chemists by the sociologists. Although in fairness the chemists had it off Caesar in the first place.

OP your SIL doesn't understand the causes she's found on Tumblr. How embarrassing for her. Cis privilege does exist but I would hazard a guess that your SIL thinks it means "everything trans people do is always good in every situation" and likewise, cultural appropriation is a thing but not in the way she thinks it is. A salwar kameez is casual clothing and you are wearing it as such; therefore no appropriation. There is actually a very good wikipedia page on it here. It does not mean that every time you have a curry you're offending India.

This is a common problem with people who learn sociology via Tumblr.

'This is a common problem with people who learn sociology via Tumblr' Probably better learning it via chemistry or geography!

To clarify, I'm not suggesting it isn't a chemistry term or something can't be trans-Siberian. I just think that cis doesn't mean a white person who is comfortable being white, as described by another poster.

almond - no, of course not.
Anyway, WTF does anyone need a term for a white person who is comfortable being white?

I have a friend that adopted a new kitten - there was much handwriting and internet debate that went on for days about whether naming the kitten 'Makeba' (as in Miriam Makeba) was cultural appropriation and therefore racist.

She's an academic who deals with these topics daily but I thought the whole thing was going too far.

What colour was the kitten?

I honestly don't get fisherman's hats on the Tube.
They are not going fishing, are they?

offensive or what?!

My mum wears them all the time. She has a condition called polycystic kidneys and despite having a transplant over a decade ago, one of the diseased kidneys is still there so she has the dilemma of being tall and slim except around her midsection because of the enlarged kidney. She has dark hair, eyes and olive skin so perhaps it doesn't look as odd as it might on a fair person though. DH is Indian and I will wear them in India but not here usually (unless it's a special occasion) because i feel like it would look a bit "try-hard" as we live in an area with a lot of Indian immigrants. They are very comfortable and can look gorgeous.

I have noticed that some Indian women, generally youngish, get a bit defensive if non-Indian women cook Indian food (I do and well), wear a sari correctly etc. i think it's because they pride those things on being special and unique to them and there is a bit of a"whites have no culture" feeling too among some people. Is your SiL Indian?

Also wanted to add that DH mentioned he got very upset at around age 7 when his mum started wearing a salwar kameez (they moved to Delhi) as previously she had only worn saris which is more customary in South India. This was in the context of my son getting upset when I wore jeans and a shirt the other day because I mostly wear dresses/skirts. DS told me not to dress like a man. Salwars are perceived as something the Muslim invaders brought with them from Persia etc. So even in India, they are 'appropriating' another culture when they wear salwar kameez.

Could it be not because they come from a different culture but because that culture is Pakistan or Afghanistan?