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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Advice for a friend?

32 replies

phoebeflangey · 05/04/2014 23:15

Reported for traffic :)

Friend has been seeing a chap she met on a website (social one rather than dating) really likes him and thought he felt the same. Trouble is, he's told her he can't see her at the next date that was arranged due to his mum disliking the fact that he met her online (like his previous 2 gf's) He says she will kick him out if he carries on seeing her, they are 24 and 25) he has since turned his phone off and she needs to know what to do

Genuine post, please be nice - I don't think he's lying for what it's worth, but do think he may be a mummies boy! Really don't understand why someone wouldn't just stop contact or tell her if he didn't want to keep seeing her?

OP posts:
Original poster
phoebeflangey · 05/04/2014 23:15

Reposted

OP posts:
Normalisavariantofcrazy · 05/04/2014 23:16

Well shot of someone who is such a mummy's boy!

Next!

TossedSaladsAndScrambledEggs · 05/04/2014 23:16

Avoid

TossedSaladsAndScrambledEggs · 05/04/2014 23:16

Lucky escape.

MojitoMadness · 05/04/2014 23:17

She needs to run far far away. He's showing that he's a mummy's boy, seriously imagine the MIL problems she'd have! Count herself lucky that she had a lucky escape.

TheFabulousIdiot · 05/04/2014 23:18

He's not that into her.
Tell her to move on.
He's not worth it.

CustardOmlet · 05/04/2014 23:18

Run for the hills!

BillyBanter · 05/04/2014 23:19

What do you mean, what should she do? Accept that he has finished it because that is what has happened.

If he'd rather live with his mum than have a girlfriend that is his choice.

TheFabulousIdiot · 05/04/2014 23:19

He is lying. Most probably.

And if he's not does that make it any better.

Is this a 'my friend' actually it's me story?

BlackDaisies · 05/04/2014 23:21

Agree! Run, and don't look back!

Original poster
phoebeflangey · 05/04/2014 23:21

No definitely a friend, I was waiting for that, she's sat with me now. So no chance at all that he's just going to return her calls after his mums bday tomorrow? (I get that it's not much better to be mummy's boy either?!)

OP posts:
ICanSeeTheSun · 05/04/2014 23:25

Early in dating is meant to be fun, not filled with stress

If I was your friend I would hope you say run for the hills.

Jolleigh · 05/04/2014 23:26

His mum probably has a reason. Maybe she's fed up of getting to know a string of women coming through the house that she doesn't see again after a few visits?

Even if it's not the case, if he really liked your friend, his mum's opinion would mean squat.

DoJo · 05/04/2014 23:27

Even if he isn't lying - he doesn't like her enough to defy his mum? Ten year olds will disobey orders from their parents if they want to be friends with someone, so a 24 year old who is a) that tied to the apron strings or b) too stupid to come up with a better excuse isn't worth the trouble.

Ask your friend if she would ditch someone she really liked because her parents disapproved? How interested would she have to be to go out with them anyway? Because he is less interested than that.

rabbitlady · 05/04/2014 23:28

its an excuse. he's blaming his mum because it sounds better than 'i don't want to see you.'

MistressDeeCee · 05/04/2014 23:29

haha!! diddums...she's best off without him, surely. She'd only have to be 'vetted' by mummy dearest, what would happen if she failed the test...?

Why on earth is your friend hanging around waiting for him anyway? He's either got someone else or he's not that into her. There's nothing she can do about that. I couldn't be bothered to go through the thinking and hassle and stressing for a 'newbie'. Move on. Fast.

Normalisavariantofcrazy · 05/04/2014 23:32

Either he's a desperate mummy's boy or married.

Possibly both

Paddington68 · 05/04/2014 23:32

He's just not that into her.

HauntedNoddyCar · 05/04/2014 23:33

Either he's lying or telling the truth. But both are very good reasons to run far away.

SavoyCabbage · 05/04/2014 23:33

She should look for a new boyfriend. "My Mam says I have to finish with you" is not a good start to a relationship.

Maybe his phone is off because his Mam has confiscated it.

Original poster
phoebeflangey · 05/04/2014 23:50

Thanks all, she's gutted, but knows really that he's either lying or being a total wuss :(

OP posts:
WooWooOwl · 06/04/2014 00:02

She needs to accept he's a prick and move on.

SoleSource · 06/04/2014 00:06

Useless twit, lucky escape, next!!!!!

AnandaTimeIn · 06/04/2014 00:14

Pathetic man hiding behind mummy, s approval...

You SO don, t need to go there....!

As has been said "Next!"

Viviennemary · 06/04/2014 00:18

There isn't really anything she can do. Except hope to meet somebody nice soon.