AIBU to be a bit annoyed MIL said 'hear you have got a little job'

[MagnaCharge]

I have finally got a job as a TA in a school, the job I wanted trained for straight from school and did from the day I qualified until I had DC1 8 years ago.I was over the moon to have got back into what I have always considered my career ( I am not bright enough to be a teacher).
Then MIL pisses on my chips by saying 'I hear you have a little job'

I said 'yes but not really a little job, back to what I did before'

She said 'no, it's just a little mummy job not too taxing and doesn't matter if you have a few days off with the children'

AIBU to think What the fuck? I worked hard for my qualifications and happen to think supporting children with additional needs is really important. And she should know that seeing as BIL has autism and still lives at home in his 50s because he was not supported to succeed at school.

[manchestermummy]

YANBU! My MIL has this attitude to my job. I have a fairly senior support role in HE, as it stands my earning potential is greater at the moment and if I was full-time I would earn exactly the same as DH.

FIL has actually gone so far as to say that what I do is a waste of time.

[MagnaCharge]

worra
Yes it is a long time since she had a child at school but she was an older mum, so not in the 70s. DH is her youngest and he left in 1992.

[TheFallenMadonna]

My MIL would mean that as a good thing. For her, little jobs are what women should have when their children are at school.

When I got promoted, I was treated to quite a long "chat" on how responsible jobs are not compatible with families. When DH got promoted, he, naturally, was warmly congratulated.

Congratulations to you BTW - did you post before about looking for a job? Fab that you're back doing what you want to do!

[squoosh]

'it's just a little mummy job not too taxing'

Stick the stupid cow under the patio.

Congrats on the job OP.

[TheCatThatSmiled]

RoaringTiger. I think you totally missed the 'In her head bit' :)

[MagnaCharge]

thefallenmadonna
Yes I have posted about struggling to find a job. I am so pleased to have got one.

[TheCatThatSmiled]

I also think that because she has had to raise a son with autism, this does not give her the right to belittle her daughter in laws achievements. Any more than me being in a wheelchair would entitle me to belittle someones is dancing aspirations (for example)

[thebody]

Congrats op.

I am TA and it's a fantastic job.

To be completely honest it's great to work around my teens and have school hols.

I used to run a very successful childminding business and paid all the bills and mortgage and it drive me ducking mental when a particular parents mil used to pick up her dgd and referred to me as 'the babysitter'

I used to be a district nurse and my dm called my job 'little' too. Very annoying and best ignored.

[Somepercentagenotcool]

I am a teacher and once we had an extremely bright (to the extent he was really funny!) Year 6 boy show some prospective parents around. He took them into the TA room and some TAs were in there - he apparently said to the parents 'and these lovely ladies are here to make a bit of extra pocket money'

I used to be a TA for a while and ultimately it's what I want to do again - all the great parts of being in school with a lot less of the bullshit!

It's not a 'little job' though (well at least not for most TAs who are very dedicated).

[MomOfTwoGirls2]

If there is a next time respond, with amusement if you can, 'ah nana, it's all very different now than it was back in your day.'

[BumPotato]

Congratulations on landing your job.

MIL's comments say more about her than you or your job, really. File it under ignore.

Well done again.

[RunnerBeen]

YANBU.

If it wasn't for the TA at my son's nursery i don't think he'd be ready to start school next year. TA is a very supportive and important role imo.

Ignore your twatty MIL and enjoy your new job.

congratulations

[formerbabe]

When I finished university, an elderly relative asked me if I was going to get a job in an office or in a shop?! No other choices besides doing a bit of typing or serving in a shop!

Its just that generation's mindset!

[Alliwantisaroomsomewhere]

Your MIL is a patronising moron.

[Alliwantisaroomsomewhere]

Congratulations, btw!

[littlemrschatterbox]

Congratulations!

There is absolutely no point in wasting your time and energy on discussing it with her.

I have similar conversations with my Mum. I love her but sometimes wonder if she is from another planet...

[bellesbelle]

When I was a student nurse, I had a friend, also a student nurse. Her father used to call it her 'little hobby'. So patronising! She was working her arse of to get a degree and career with 3 children. She used to laugh it off, but gave me the rage.

[TeaOneSugar]

MIL uses that expression, apparently I'm a good little driver - no idea what that means driving is driving no.

I also earn a "mans wage" which is just as patronising, i remind her it's mine and I'm definitely a woman.

[Applespearsorangesandlemons]

I get this from other mums. I work part time and am frequently asked whether I work in admin, nothing wrong with working in admin at all, I would be truly dreadful at it but it's the assumption that anything else isn't a job for mums but when I tell them my exact job they are often visibly shocked and comment that they didn't realise that I had a real job.

[Thattimeofyearagain]

Firstly, congratulations
My fil told all dh side of the family that I had a little job cleaning an office
News to me, as I had done numerous collage courses whilst dc were little so I could get my current full time position within Training. To him women have 2 acceptable job roles, cleaner or hairdresser.

[growingolddicustingly]

Let her come and tell my bearded and hairy-arsed stepson that being a TA is just a little mummy job, not too taxing Patronising woman.

[TheListingAttic]

Her first comment: bit tactless. Her second: bitch central!

Glad to hear you've got back into your career. It's so great to have a job you care about and find satisfying.

[NannyK7H]

Bloody hell, TA jobs are like gold dust! Well done xx

[kiwimumof2boys]

Ermmm . . . and what high powered job does SHE hold??? CEO, high powered manager of blah blah??

I bet she doesn't even work outside the home !!
Congratulations by the way. Ignore MIL

[HarrietSchulenberg]

Snort at the idea of it being easy to have time out of school to be with your own kids. I've missed carol concerts at which my children have performed, sports days and just about everything that my own kids do at their own schools because my secondary school won't allow me time off. If I have time off who will cover the kids I am paid to work with?

Tell your MIL I said she's an arse.