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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

scootering on the pavement

89 replies

madeitagain · 01/04/2014 19:38

On Mother's Day I joined some friends for lunch. They have two children each. One has a child slightly younger than my own (who is 4 and 1/2) and an older one (7) and the other has a 7 year old and a young child who is in a pushchair.
After lunch we all went to a park that was a few blocks away. All the children except the young one (in a pushchair) had a scooter. My child is competitive and quite impulsive. I always keep a very close watch on him when he scooters on the pavement. I was horrified to be part of of group who just basically let their children go for it along the pavement. They had to stop at the kerb and wait for us and to be fair they did.But I was overwhelmed with anxiety and so incredibly stressed. I made my four year old come and scooter beside me. He wasn't at all happy with the other children scootering along with no apparent supervision from the other two mothers. I was livid that both my child and I had been put in such a (to me dangerous situation). I did say something to the other mothers. But basically I was so furious with them.

OP posts:

Joules68 · 01/04/2014 19:41

But you took control of your child and made him scoot next to you?

itiswhatitiswhatitis · 01/04/2014 19:41

If their children aren't competitive and impulsive then they are going to be more relaxed about it than you were. I think you are over reacting

Ubik1 · 01/04/2014 19:42

oh god not this again

hotcrosshunny · 01/04/2014 19:44

You put him in that situation not them.

I hate scootering off like that and will bollock ds when he gets carried away with friends. I never tell the mums off though, that's their call.

FederationPresidentBarryFife · 01/04/2014 19:44

ah I have a friend like you. I am a member of the other crew and let my kids scoot off, climb to the top, go on the grown up swings etc etc. I feel like I have different risk concerns to her. I know she is a bit at me sometimes but I think she can be ludicrously precious.

No need for you to be angry, they make their parenting choices, you make yours. Just do what makes you feel comfortable. I bet your son was fuming though!

Brittabot · 01/04/2014 19:45

Is this a reverse AIBU? They parented how they wanted, you parented how you wanted, I think YABU to be furious.

meditrina · 01/04/2014 19:45

If they want to scoot quickly (and recklessly?) away from parents, then that should be done in a park (away from well-frequented footpaths).

I think children scooting ahead on pavements are either an accident waiting to happen (traffic) or a menace (until of an age where they can reliably leave plenty of space round pedestrians).

OhYouBadBadKitten · 01/04/2014 19:46

The only thing that scares me really is cars pulling out of drives. They often end up having to poke their nose out on to the pavement before they can see and dont expect a 10 mile an hour tot whizzing along.

Balaboosta · 01/04/2014 19:50

Zzzzzzzzzz

Guitargirl · 01/04/2014 19:54

How were you and your child put in a dangerous situation?

BrownSauceSandwich · 01/04/2014 19:55

I'm not sure what you're angry about..? That your friends trust their children to be careful on their scooters?

Original poster

madeitagain · 01/04/2014 20:10

I was angry because my child is impulsive and competitive and I think if the roles had been reversed I would have been a bit more aware of the other parent and their child's temperament. They do know my son fairly well. And no I am not precious with my son. When we are in the park or an open space area he is given a free reign to explore, get dirty and take reasonable risks.

OP posts:

NoodleOodle · 01/04/2014 20:13

I still have no idea what you are angry about. The other parents know that your child what????

ChoudeBruxelles · 01/04/2014 20:16

So they stopped when told too? And that is dangerous in what way?

I let ds scoot and cycle off though and he plays out without supervision(he's 7) so I think you're being a bit ott

WipsGlitter · 01/04/2014 20:17

So they should have been aware of your child's impulsive and competitive nature and modified their children's behaviour to suit his needs?

specialsubject · 01/04/2014 20:17

badkitten - I've had that near miss, leaving the drive and hearing a mother scream as a fast-moving small child on a scooter halted feet from a front tyre. I would have seen him before he went in front of me, but he was that near going full tilt into the side of my car. Possibly head-first. I can stop a car but I can't make it disappear.

fortunately I always reverse in and drive out forward, and do so dead slowly. If either of those things were different...many people reverse out and have no chance of seeing kids on pavements.

the only wheels used on pavements should be pushchairs and wheelchairs. Scooters are for the park.

hopefully the other mums might read this.

HauntedNoddyCar · 01/04/2014 20:19

But why should your dc's impulsive .nature ruin the other dc's fun?

NoodleOodle · 01/04/2014 20:21

Scooters are supposed to be used on the pavement though, aren't they? If not, all those schools were being a bit weird in encouraging primary aged children to scooter to school recently.

hotcrosshunny · 01/04/2014 20:23

Yes I know someone who lost a toddler - someone reversed out and knocked the child over :(

That's why I'm really funny about ds scooting on pavements because he wouldn't stand a chance against a car. So many people reverse out of drives without a thought.

Guitargirl · 01/04/2014 20:24

Are you saying that the other mothers should have asked their 7 year olds to not scooter because your 4 year old is competitive?! Bonkers...

Joules68 · 01/04/2014 20:26

Impulsive and competitive?? Do you mean badly behaved and hard to control? You expect everyone else to adjust to suit your son?

Chippednailvarnish · 01/04/2014 20:27

I was overwhelmed with anxiety and so incredibly stressed

Er, maybe the real issue here is your anxiety...

Original poster

madeitagain · 01/04/2014 20:30

I don't think it is unreasonable if there is a situation like this, and one of the party is an impulsive and fairly competitive child, if expectations of all the children are modified. I am angry because my son cannot be expected at present to scooter along the pavement without being well supervised. Obviously I wasn't going to allow him to do this and obviously he was going to be stroppy. I think the other parents (who know my son quite well) could have been a bit more supportive of my predicament and the obvious strop he was going to throw if he had a different set of rules to the other children. Yes I would have expected the other parents to anticipate this and be a little bit more supportive.

OP posts:

londonrach · 01/04/2014 20:32

Scootering should be banned. I hate seeing children a head of parents fast. I've seen one child not stop in time at a crossing and scoot under a bus. Awful for the bus driver, child and mum.

Original poster

madeitagain · 01/04/2014 20:33

Yes my child can be badly behaved and hard to control. But no more so than the other children in the group. They all have there own personalities and temperaments.

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