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AIBU?

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Original poster

Receiving bottles of wine when you don't drink. Was I rude?

64 replies

RabbitPies · 31/03/2014 15:08

Is it rude to use a bottle of wine that you've been gifted,for cooking?

I don't drink alcohol at all,but I do occasionally cook with it.And was recently.very kindly.given a bottle of wine by guests. I thanked them as it was very kind of them,but when I mentioned to another friend that I was going to use it in a meal. She said she'd be offended if someone did that with a bottle she'd given them.

Is it really so rude?

OP posts:
Moreisnnogedag · 31/03/2014 15:11

Nope. If you don't drink what else would you do with it??

I wouldn't mind at all if a friend did this (might be tad embarrassed I didn't remember they don't drink!)

SolidGoldBrass · 31/03/2014 15:12

Not in the least. After all, cooking with it means that you are making use of the gift and getting pleasure from it. What else would you have done with it other than pass it along to someone else? (Which wouldn't be rude either)

NotNewButNameChanged · 31/03/2014 15:12

A gift, once given, belongs to the person who has received it and they can do what the hell they like with it.

So says Judge Judy. Good enough for me!

InAGrump · 31/03/2014 15:13

Not rude at all!

RobotLover68 · 31/03/2014 15:13

I do it all the time - I don't drink red wine but use it to cook with YANBU

ToysRLuv · 31/03/2014 15:13

I wouldn't think so! It's fine, unless it was really expensive -then I would re-gift it.. Either way, I would not mention it to the gift givers -they are unlikely to ask anyway.

hairypaws · 31/03/2014 15:18

Your friend is easily offended clearly. It's the perfect way to use it.

MaidOfStars · 31/03/2014 15:20

I think you are perfectly reasonable. However, I guess I might feel a little bit put out if I spunked a load of money on a really decent bottle of vino, only to find it had been plonked in the spag bol (suspect this is where your friend is stuck at). However, if the recipient of my gift doesn't drink, and I had forgotten that, my feelings of being put out wouldn't last long (how could I justify being annoyed?).

TestingTestingWonTooFree · 31/03/2014 15:21

Not rude at all. Better for you to make use of it than not. I suppose if it was really expensive, I'd regift it or serve it to guests who do drink.

ToAvoidConversation · 31/03/2014 15:21

It's a non-issue. I don't drink wine but regularly cook with wine that guests leave over. Got some in the freezer at the moment.

struggling100 · 31/03/2014 15:21

No! If it's a gift to you, you can use it however you like - add it to the bath if you want!

Catsmamma · 31/03/2014 15:22

your friend is off her trolley...and presumably under the misapprehension that cooking wine is sub standard and you are implying that.

Use it as you see fit ...and don't tell her.

Thumbwitch · 31/03/2014 15:24

God, it's better than leaving it to moulder in the bottle!

My Dad is a staunch (and dry) Methodist, but that hasn't stopped numerous people giving him bottles of alcohol over the years. Many of them were regifted (several in my direction when I had my own house! Grin) but several more went to complete waste, as I discovered when we lived at his house for 3 weeks and he made me go through them all. So many were corked/gone off :(

I wouldn't be telling the friend that gave me the wine what I had done with it though, just in case she's as easily offended as the one you were talking to!

WeeClype · 31/03/2014 15:24

My DH was given a bottle of Jack Daniels so he wrapped it as a secret Santa at work as he doesn't drink it, he then got another bottle from work as a birthday present. I'm sure it's the same bottle and it's doing the rounds the staff Smile

ClownsLeftJokersRight · 31/03/2014 15:25

No not rude at all. Or you can always send unwanted wine away to a good cause ie meWink

Callani · 31/03/2014 15:28

Check online to see how much the bottle is - I'd say under a tenner and you can cook with it, otherwise you probably ought to regift it as someone will think you're quite generous (or that's the limit amongst my circle!)

But it's your gift and up to you at the end of the day.

halfwildlingwoman · 31/03/2014 15:30

Not rude, but I would be more likely to re-gift alcohol that I don't drink than cook with it.

Lweji · 31/03/2014 15:30

You could serve it to other dinner guests at another time, but it's ok to use it for cooking too.

In fact, I have heard that you are supposed to use the same wine for cooking as for drinking.

HappyAgainOneDay · 31/03/2014 15:31
  1. Give it to someone whose party you are going to
  2. Give it away as a birthday present
  3. Offer it as a raffle or tombola prize (fetes coming up)
  4. If you know it's a cheap bottle of wine, use it for cooking. If there's any left over after one recipe, freeze the rest in ice cube trays.
  5. Send it to me.
plumnc · 31/03/2014 15:36
  1. If its a nice bottle, serve it when you have friends over ( if you ever serve wine)
zumm · 31/03/2014 15:36

Don't worry OP - they won't mind. However, they MAY have minded on the night. Since you don't drink, you may not realise but (in my view) the best thing to do when guests bring wine is to OPEN it and serve it with the meal (even if you don't drink).
I think that's the most sociable and hospitable way of behaving. Must admit, always a bit surprised if I take wine to someone's house and they DON"T open it (only happens with one set of friends who match wine with food so they've opened sev bottles in advance - so that's OK ;).
Mind you OP, we're polar opposites since I love wine and we get really great bottles as gifts - so it's about sharing the pleasure.

OnlyLovers · 31/03/2014 15:38

No, it's not rude (and how did your friend think the giver would find out what you'd done with it anyway?), but like someone else says, it might be a pity if it was a really nice bottle of wine.

I don't drink and if someone gives me a nice bottle of wine I just stash it until I have alcohol-drinking friends round or need something to take to a party.

BillyBanter · 31/03/2014 15:41

If it's naice wine it would maybe be a better use to regift and just get some cheap plonk for cooking.

It's fine though. It's your wine to do what you want with.

Original poster
RabbitPies · 31/03/2014 15:41

They gave me the wine as they left,or I'd have poured it.

OP posts:
Original poster
RabbitPies · 31/03/2014 15:41

Served it even.

OP posts:
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