Wedding anniversary party and present

[HarlotOTara]

Dh and I have been invited to a 10th wedding anniversary party. I was thinking of giving a card and a tin of beans - as a joke as 10th is tin I think. Dh brought home the invite which has a poem asking for money instead of presents so they can go away for the weekend.

Aibu to think this is a cheek and rather crass?

[Aeroflotgirl]

What a load if fecking bollox, that poem is . Cheeky fecker a asking for gifts, you've already had a wedding!

[LittleBearPad]

Cheeky sods.

[mameulah]

I wouldn't go because their stupid poem would annoy me too much.

I would get out of it by sending a card and giving them a cheap bottle of something fizzy.

[RuddyDuck]

I have never heard of a 10th anniversary party. And to ask for money???

Dh and I don't usually remember celebrate our wedding anniversary, but we did go away for our 10th, just for the weekend. We wouldn't have dreamed of asking others to pay for it. It's our 20th anniversary this year, but as it falls slap bang in the middle of dc doing GCSEs and A levels, we won't be going away.

Cant believe the cheek of sone people. I wouldn't go to the party or give them any money. As others have said, if they can't afford a weekend away without asking for money, then don't have a party and use that money instead. Crap poem as well.

[aGirlDownUnder1]

I honestly can't believe people think it's acceptable ask for money as a present especially with a cringeworthy poem and it is only a tenth wedding anniversary. I probably would've just gotten the couple a card.

We never had an anniversary party except on our first year which was just a BBQ in the back yard with my family

I wouldn't even bring a card now. YANBU!

[vexedfoxy]

That poem made my skin crawl...............No way would I go to that party.....

[Boris13]

carryondancing

That is great!!!!!

[Boris13]

Have an anniversary party - If u must

Don't have a party if you can't afford a weekend away...

Wedding present poems asking for money are bad enough!!!
I would always just buy something!!

I wouldn't think of buying a present, (unless very close to me, and we had a private joke and there was a little quirky something...
I would not give money...

cheeky cheeky bustards!!!!

[Gooseysgirl]

I am stunned.... cheeky feckers!! They wouldn't even get a card from me. Kens and Carrys

[LoveBeingCantThinkOfAName]

Yuck grabby and horrible. Makes me think they've invite loads of people just to get some money.

[BalloonSlayer]

"To save you from all the searching and guessing
We would love a weekend away for some fun"

and

"Now that we have saved you all the fuss
We can't wait for you to celebrate with us!"

• I love the way they imply they are doing YOU a favour
  

So glad to hear you got to ten
No one thought you'd last till then
Still, it's a bit odd you're holding
A party - unless the wedding's golden
And though we're pleased you are still happy
You seem to have become a trifle grabby
So we'll just wish you lots of luck
And as for money - off you fuck!

[ceres]

the poem is awful.

asking for presents is rude.

BUT if you are going to a party it is just as bad to turn up with your hands hanging. I don't understand people saying go but don't buy them anything - that's just as bad imo.

so I agree with your husband - politely decline and leave them to it.

[Bunbaker]

"BUT if you are going to a party it is just as bad to turn up with your hands hanging. I don't understand people saying go but don't buy them anything - that's just as bad imo."

I don't agree, not for an anniversary party. We never go to parties anyway so I have no idea what party etiquette these days is, but when we used to go we just took a bottle.

Why not print this thread off and send it to the party givers. They probably don't realise what a social faux pas they have made.

Years ago a friend had a 30th birthday party and asked for money in the invitations. Some people took offence and just didn't bother going.

[Unexpected]

I want you to go, print out all these poems in different cards and pop them in the "Moneybox" for them to enjoy after the party! Or is that just tooooo mean ........

[justmyview]

I think fair enough to have an anniversary party, but I would think small present (as you would normally take to a birthday party) is fine. Money is cheeky.

[LaurieFairyCake]

We're hoping to have a party for our 10th this year if we can afford it. I think ten is really something to celebrate (cos I've been divorced )

I want people to not bring gifts - how do I do that?

[Perfectlypurple]

balloonslayer I love that one. op send that one.

How grabby is that. We don't even expect cards for ours. It's something that is important to us.

[Perfectlypurple]

Laurie, you could ask a charity you support for a collection box and state on the invite no gifts but there will be a collection box for your favourite charity. We did this for an elderly relatives birthday.

[pianodoodle]

I'd go and eat all the food, get DH drunk and tell him the money box was a urinal just before we left...

[oldwomaninashoe]

I used to work for a well known china company in a big store and we used to have a wedding list service, which was very popular.

One day a woman came in and said that she wanted to set up a list ( on her list was a whole dinner service for eight about 2,500 worth) it transpired that this wasn't for a wedding but for people coming to her 40th (ruby) wedding party to know what to buy her and her DH.

I was taken a bit aback, never having had this sort of "list" requested before. She was given the "slips" (about the list) to go in with her invitations.

All in total 4 cereal/fruit bowls were purchased from her list!!!

So you can see what her guests thought of that!

[WilsonFrickett]

My flabber is actually ghasted, firstly by the toe-curlingly teeth-itchingly awfulness of that 'poem', secondly by the cheek of it!

FFS. Do people do this?

[pictish]

Balloonslayer that's hilarious.

[Comeatmefam]

You want cash for a weekend away
You really think friends should pay?
You better beware
(Not that I care)
That most guests will say 'NO WAY'

[pianodoodle]

Roses are red, violets are blue... You're a dreadful ould couple of cheeky money grabbing assholes so we'd rather sit at home sticking pins in our eyes than come to your poxy do... thank you.

[101handbags]

I've never heard of anybody having a party for a 10 year anniversary. Surely wedding anniversary parties start with the silver wedding? The asking for money and the poem are unbelievably crass. Are they secretly mumsnet members and have done this to see how soon the thread about it starts?