aibu to let kids travel unaccompanied?

[loopyluna]

Travel plans for summer involve; DS (14) and DD (12) taking an international (2 hour) flight. As "unaccompanied minors" they will be looked after by cabin crew from us leaving them to friends picking them up. Their return flight will be with 2 same age friends, so same thing.

Also, DS and his friend (also 14) will be taking a 3 hour train journey within the UK. (They'll be waved off and collected from the platform at each end.)

The kids are all fine with this and are v excited about all the jet setting involved. My DM thinks they are too young, particularly for the train, and has set my worry mode off. AIBU to let them travel like this? I'm sure I was taking the train alone at 14 but DM denies all knowledge!

Absolutely fine by me. The only thing I would do for the train journey is make sure they have phones and get them to take an earlier rather than late train.

Sounds like fun.

YANBU.

DS flew to see my parents by himself last year and he was 14. He's doing it again this year.

My second flight ever was alone, aged 14, not even booked in as an unaccompanied minor, just travelling solo on a three-hour flight (I was met at the other end). My mother was fine with it then, but I am sure she would have been hysterically worried if I did the same with my DCs at the same age - she's got much more anxious as she has got older.

I also went youth-hostelling for a week with one female friend when I was 15, travelling around on foot or by bus, no mobile phones in those days, and we were fine. DM would also have conniptions if I allowed 15yo DS to do the same now.

I'd just ignore your mother, your DCs will be fine.

"Personally, I wouldn't let mine travel at this age, far too young.
I'd be far more worried about the flight than the train, but its up to you."

Why?

No idea wrt the train journey, but my brother and I flew four hours to our grandparents when I was 14/15 and he was 12 and we weren't accompanied by cabin crew either I think it sounds fine and my parents have spoken to us about doing it next year with DS1 and DS2 who will be 7 and 9. We haven't decided or asked them but I think your situation sounds perfectly reasonable.

Sounds fine to me.

The DC aren't worried or anxious about it, so it's a good way to get them accustomed to travelling alone.

Just ensure they have phones, phone numbers (separate in case of loss of phone!) and cash and all bases are covered.

Another good idea, Princessalbert. I'll give them a notebook with essential phone numbers!

I'd be happy with the flight as they cant get off anywhere but think its too young for the train.

I travelled solo on trains and planes from age 12 with no problems.

I've known several children do journeys like this, and a couple do middle of nowhere France to Yorkshire by train and ferry.

The only problem they had was faking illness on the ferry in order to get their own cabin!

Then there was the Dr I worked with whose grandfather would be sent by train/ferry from the far east of Russia to England just relying on other passengers to help him on his week long trip.

It depends on the children, sensible, done the trip, get trains a lot, kids should be fine.

I'm sure they will have mobiles, spare cash and a back up plan (pre paid credit card for a travelodge??)

I travelled by plane and train on my own at that age. Assuming no complicated changes and they have fully charged mobiles (I didn't!) it sounds fine.

At 14, DS1 and a friend went on a long train journey which involved a Tube transfer between stations. We are regularly in London, so DS1 was unperturbed. But his friend had never been on any underground trains before, and although they managed, he was a bit unnerved by it on the way there.

But the way back was fine

My brother and I flew Air NZ to New Zealand as unaccompanied minors when I was 9 and he was 11. It was fine - they take a huge amount of care of kids on their own. Train journey should be fine as they're old enough to look after each other, especially with friends. You could always look for the train conductor (or ticket checking person) and ask them to do a periodic check to make sure everything's ok.

Absolutely fine. I used to work for BA, unaccompanied minors are ten a penny at holiday time. Very safe, dropped off at LHR and met at destination, documentation all the way through so that the correct person/people meet the child at the other end. I'd send my own children (if they were old enough - have to be 5 as far as I recall).

There are some very bizarre, typical AIBU responses on this thread! All the bitchy stuff about 'is that what cabin crew are paid to do?' - yes, actually, and with a number of quality airlines. Either crew or a nominated 'auntie' or 'uncle'. Very very common and most kids have a great time!

think its too young for the train
you think 12 and 14 is too young to use a train?
how do all those school children get to school and back every day?

Also, just to add, the flight will be safer than the train as once you're on board, you're in a secure environment. Anyone can get on and off trains - flights rather less so! Again, very surprised at some of the comments above!

Both myself and my husband travelled from age 7 regularly as unaccompanied minors. Assuming they have flown before and are sensible I wouldn't worry about them, there are lots of staff in airports to help.

I also traveled to Birmingham on the train regularly from about 14. And would make sure they have their phone charged and a charger handy just incase.

My DDs regularly fly and take intercity trains alone (not as UMs, some airlines take them from 12) and have done since they were 12/13.

Your Mum is just being a nervous grandma. If you're happy because you know your DC are responsible and capable, then there is no problem.

Yanbu if the dc are up for it. My dsis regularly visited her French pen friend alone from a similar age, but I wouldn't have felt comfortable flying alone then. But then, your dc will have each other.

I would be less worried about the plane journey than the train journey.

Although having said that, my last experience of doing a connection with BA was so appalling that they gave me a huge amount of compensation and I still would never fly with them again.

I would not send my child on a flight with a connection now unless I had something in writing from BA outlining that they will be with my child for the entire duration of the connection, especially if something goes wrong and the child ends up in a hotel for a night. Also that they would ensure my child was cared for and adequately fed during that time.

It's all very well saying there are lots of staff in the airport to ask questions, but if there are flight delays then you can wait hours to talk to that member of staff.

In my experience they gave out completely misleading information. I was told to take a bus that didn't exist, to a hotel in Slough that they named incorrectly on the slip, so the taxi driver nearly dropped me at the wrong hotel.

I also had to find 40 pounds cash to pay the taxi driver to the hotel and 25 pounds to pay the taxi driver back to the airport next day.

I was told there would be food at the hotel (I hadn't eaten in hours) but there was none, so I ended up wandering around Slough at 11pm looking for a takeaway.

The idea of my children being put in a similar situation gives me shivers, so although I do send mine as UMs, I will only send them on direct flights.

Of course they are old enough. It's good for them to know they are trusted and will rise to the challenge. Next summer they may have much bigger ideas ...

I'd be fine with it all. Unaccompanied minors are well looked after and the train will be an adventure. Expect frequent texts & supply cash for endless drinks & snacks.
My DS's have done both without a hitch.

I would worry more about the train - flights are far more controlled.

I travelled to Newcastle from Aberdeen at 15, having never travelled further than 3 miles alone. I took the Friday train at I think 3, maybe 4 and by Edinburgh most people on my carriage were drunk. One man I can remember was with several friends, all looked 40s/50s, sat across the aisle and started asking me where I was headed. Landed up with transport police meeting him due to his later actions with another woman.

Awful journey - the lights went out completely on Forth rail as well which was scary (mid February, train in pitch black suddenly) and had a very heavy period.

I won't mention the fact that my very liberal aunty met me with a bacardi breezer!

It depends of course where they are going/when but if it's heading towards Glasgow, Newcastle and probably London I would reckon there will be drunk people, more so on Fridays and Saturdays.

On weekdays, Sundays, early mornings, I've never had a problem. Similarly, going north has always been fine as well (i.e. Edinburgh to Aberdeen/Inverness/Wick lines). I presume similar happens down south.

So train wise, I would book very wisely and tell the staff once they board the train. As boys there's probably far less risk of problems like I mentioned but they might still feel uncomfy with regards to atmosphere at times.

Would get them to take a phone, spare cash, list of stops and an idea of what to do if they have to disembark at each one. Also have them keep their bags with them, under the seat or something.

It's fine for a 12 and 14 year old.

I used to regularly travel down to Cardiff on the train on my own when I was about 11. Mum used to put me on at one end, sit me near a family and let the guard know and my Aunty used to meet me off the train in Cardiff. This was in the days when there were no mobiles.

I used to love it and to be fair I was a very sensible, independant 11 year old.

Of course they'll be fine. Hundreds of children travel by train and plane unaccompanied every week. If my 13YO nephew with SN can get himself across London to school every day and travel much further afied by train by himself, I'm sure 2 NT teenagers will be able to cope.