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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to ask them to bring her home??

37 replies

macdoodle · 15/03/2014 21:52

DD1 12/13 is sleeping at a friends house tonight. She slept at another friends house last night. I warned her it would be too much but she was insistent. She also got her period yesterday. So I knew she's be tired and grumpy, but when do they ever listen.
She's has just text me saying she doesn't want to stay. My first inclination was to say "tough you insisted on going so you have to stay", but she sounds really miserable and says the dad and brother are teasing her about being fat (she really isnt but very sensitive about her weight especially when she's bloated with her period).
Problem is I am a single parent and my DD2 (age 6) is fast asleep in bed. I really dont want to wake her up to go get DD1.
WIBU to ask the mum (there is a dad there as well) to bring her home for me?? I could try and ask a neighbour to watch DD2 but its almost 10pm :(

OP posts:
pussycatdoll · 15/03/2014 21:53

I'd wake dd
They might have had a drink
Or get dd a taxi ?

WaitMonkey · 15/03/2014 21:54

The dad and the brother are calling her fat ? Shock Ask a neighbour to pop round and go and get her. Poor thing.

WaitMonkey · 15/03/2014 21:55

Yes, wake the lo and go and get her. She sounds really miserable.

DramaAlpaca · 15/03/2014 21:56

I'd wake DD2 and go & get her.

She needs to know she can rely on you to get her out of a situation she doesn't want to be in.

douchbag · 15/03/2014 21:56

I would ask the mum to bring dd home as she's upset her dh has called her fat!

MeepMeepVrooom · 15/03/2014 21:56

Could you ring her a taxi (reputable firm) and pay when she arrives?

McPheezingMyButtOff · 15/03/2014 21:57

I'd go and get her, and just put it down to experience.

You must feel very torn, so go wake your dd. Or you'll not relax Smile

ADishBestEatenCold · 15/03/2014 21:58

I agree, get her home, but not via the friends parents.

Ask your neighbour to pop in and, if that's not possible, I'd do what pussycatdoll suggested and wake DD2.

ADishBestEatenCold · 15/03/2014 21:59

Oh, and I think the dad who is calling your DD fat sounds like an arse!

IAmNotAPrincessIAmAKahleesi · 15/03/2014 21:59

I think you should get her home but I think you'd be very unreasonable to expect her friends parents to being her home for you, especially when you knew it wasn't going to be a good idea

Goldmandra · 15/03/2014 22:01

If I was your neighbour I would prefer to pop round and babysit for a while than know your DD was away from home and unhappy. Go and ask.

purplebaubles · 15/03/2014 22:04

Just wake your six year old up, and go and get her.

Original poster
macdoodle · 15/03/2014 22:04

Thanks all, I feel terrible :( She's a good girl, and they are actually a really nice family. But a large family with lots of ribbing and teasing, the dad is a complete joker, not nasty, but at 12/13 with a period and not used to it, its not great :( The little brother is only 6 so not being nasty just copying dad I suspect. We are a much calmer family just me and the DD's and I dont really do ribbing :(
Both the neighbours I am closest to have lights off, one is a 80 odd yr old lady who lives alone and the other a very busy working mum (who may be working early tomorrow). I cant wake either of them up. Just checked DD2, fast fast asleep and was a battle to get her off. Not happy with the taxi idea, we live fairly suburban/rural, and the friend is inner city. I have always warned DD1 not to be in a taxi alone, she'll poop herself.
I know I'm making excuses :(:(
Have spoken to the mum, and said she has her period and feels unwell, one of them is bringing her home now.
Ah well lesson learned, maybe she'll listen to me next time! Am just glad she let me know.

OP posts:
ProlificPenguin · 15/03/2014 22:05

Another agreement, go get her x

Qix · 15/03/2014 22:05

Definitely get her. You want her to know she can always call you when she wants to leave a place. It sounds like a horrible atmosphere.

Original poster
macdoodle · 15/03/2014 22:06

It is at times like this, that I absolutely HATE being a single parent. And usually I am completely fine and manage perfectly. Having to choose between children is very hard :(

OP posts:
Goldmandra · 15/03/2014 22:07

Glad she's on her way home Smile

HadABadDay2014 · 15/03/2014 22:07

I would wake the 6 year old up and go and get her .I would also be having stern words with the father about calling her fat.

What adult picks on a child about his/her weight.

Qix · 15/03/2014 22:07

Maybe she'll listen to me

You make it sound like you're her friend offering advice. You're allowed to say no!

Original poster
macdoodle · 15/03/2014 22:09

Do you have a teen Qix?
I am most certainly not her "friend" and she knows that, didnt have a good reason to point blank refuse, other than saying she would be tired and grumpy.
Ok then maybe I'll learn for next time :( I do really feel bad enough.

OP posts:
McPheezingMyButtOff · 15/03/2014 22:10

I'm just glad you are able to get her home

Every one to bed soon Smile

BumpyGrindy · 15/03/2014 22:15

The Dad's a wanker and I'd tell him so. What an ARSE! Who says that to a girl of this age...or any girl!

DramaAlpaca · 15/03/2014 22:19

So glad she's coming home.

Please don't feel bad. You sound like a wonderful mum Flowers

WaitMonkey · 15/03/2014 22:31

Glad she's on her way home. Give her a great big cuddle and send her to bed. You do sound a very lovely mum. That dad does sound an arse though, who thinks making fun of someone's weight is amusing. Sad

ADishBestEatenCold · 15/03/2014 22:36

Hopefully she's home by now and soon to be sleeping soundly.

You did the right thing, OP, at that age they're not half as confident as they think they are! IYSWIM.

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