was I unreasonable to have these pics removed?

[realitygone]

A family member who we are no contact with placed two happy birthday notices in the local newspaper / online these adds had their pictures, full dob and full name on.

I have had the paper remove them, anyone can view them and it makes them very identifiable and it scares the hell Out of me when the view count said 20! 20 people looked at my children without my permission

I don't thini I over reacted, however wondered if anyone thinks this is ok to do?.

[ginmakesitallok]

What do you think is going to happen as a result of your children's pictures being in the paper????

Hundreds of people look at your children without your permission every day.

YABU

[FunkyBoldRibena]

As we don't know the back story - nobody knows if you were being unreasonable or not.

HTH.

[BillyBanter]

It does seem to me a weird thing to do. Is it quite common in local papers for people to do this?

If you are NC because they are toxic then this is a sort of harassment though from their point of view its probably their way of showing the world how much they love them despite NC. Or to give the impression that everything is fine and hide the fact they have been excluded from your Children's lives.

[JumpingJackSprat]

Nobody needs to know the circumstances of why she is nc with this person you're all just being bloody nosy. Fact is she has her reasons so no op yanbu.

[PuppyMonkey]

Maybe the kids are on an undercover mission with MI5?

[gamerchick]

I don't think I would have been comfortable with it either... For reasons I can't quite put my finger on.

They're gone now.. try not to stress about it.

[formerbabe]

I can't believe anyone thinks this is OK. I think its outrageous and would be fuming.

Op...YANBU!

[Martorana]

"Nobody needs to know the circumstances of why she is nc with this person you're all just being bloody nosy. Fact is she has her reasons so no op yanbu."

But they might be unreasonable reasons.

[Martorana]

why, formerbabe? What possible harm could it do?

[Joules68]

What does the other parent in all this think?

[formerbabe]

Because it is strange behaviour to print photos of someone else's children in a newspaper.

Whether it can cause harm or not, is not the issue. It is a privacy issue.

[cloggal]

But Martorana, that's a separate AIBU.

We know that there is no contact between OP and dc with these relatives. So we can only judge the AIBU on the fact that people who are essentially strangers to this child have done this, regardless of backstory.
Some still think it's a harmless gesture, some will see it as potentially harassing.

Agree with JumpingJackSprat.

[formerbabe]

I'm not sure of the law but I wonder if it breaks the data protection act?

[Figster]

Genuinely don't know if yabu as there's no context

[CoffeeTea103]

Ffs! Get over yourself. So what, I really don't get what the big deal people make about this issue. It's not like you have the royal baby or something.

[WilsonFrickett]

Presumably you have no contact for a reason, so this is a provocative gesture at some level, in which case YANBU.

However the '20 people looked at my children's photos' is a bit bonkers. As pps have said, people see your children every day.

But as you are nc with whoever did this, yes, overall YANBU.

[cloggal]

T

[HanSolo]

It is not harmless- if they are no contact it will be for a reason.

They have done this to exert control.

Imagine if those children were adopted, and suddenly people find out their real names, and match them up?

[Fifyfomum]

How did they get the photos if you are NC

[cloggal]

^ dc posted.. And then hit send on my report of the post to MNHQ . Agree Wilson

[HanSolo]

And yes- it may be damaging if those children decide to be intelligence agents in the future!

but quite serious really. We do not know what will happen 10 years hence, and technology moves so fast, this could put them in danger once facial recognition software is of a good standard.

[ImASecretTwigletNibbler]

People's reactions here are odd! If the OP said "someone put a picture of my child on the internet, with full identification details" people would go crazy.... the local paper is no different. Yes, of course realistically, nothing is going to happen but you just don't stick identifying photos up in public these days!

OP, YADNBU! I do think it was probably just a kind gesture from someone who knows nothing about internet safety but I too would take them down. The pictures, not the person who did it :)

[kelda]

YANBU. I would never do that without the parents' permission.

[Electryone]

The op is non- contact with the person who placed the op, presumably for abusive reasons

Thats the problem with assumptions - they can be wrong, we have no idea what the no contact is about. Its odd for sure, but I really don't see what the outrage at your "20 people have viewed my children" comment - so what..what exactly are you worried about will happen to your children now? Hate to tell you but 100s of strangers will see them on a daily basis....

[HanSolo]

Yes electryone, but not their full names, and DoBs.

The local paper will have a website, these pics will have been put on there (I'm assuming that's how OP knows).

For most families, this just isn't an issue, but why do people obtusely refuse to believe it can cause problems for others? What if the family is a forces family? Or a diplomats family? Or the children's dad works with psycopathic child molesters?

Or even, just simple identitfy theft! People are so naive about putting their personal information out there. The announcement showed their photo (i.e. appearance) full name and DoB- a gift for someone needing an alias for a freshly made passport or drivers licence.