To really want to say something to these abortion protestors?

[Crocodileclip]

Firstly, I know I will probably never say anything as I appreciate that the protestors have the right to protest but it really pisses me off.

A small group of people have been protesting outside the Marie Stoppes clinic in Belfast since it opened in 2012. They stand outside the door on the days it is open holding anti abortion posters and trying to gather signatures for a petition. I pass them on my way to get to the station at home time and every time it annoys me. I can't imagine how offputting they would be if you were young and scared and just wanting some advice. Lots of pics of aborted foetuses etc. I find it intimidating enough myself and I am just walking past. I actually put my head down and walk quicker so that nobody asks me to sign the petition.

I'm currently pregnant with my second and am lucky never to have been in a position where abortion was an option but am of the opinion that there are situations in which it may be the best option available.

The clinic itself operates within NI law so only offers abortions up to 9 weeks and as far as I know is the only such clinic in Northern Ireland. I think I would be ok with the protestors doing their stuff elsewhere in the city centre it is the fact that it is just outside the only entrance to the clinc that makes me irrationally angry. Does this happen at other Marie Stoppes clinics elsewhere in the UK?

different you have more support than you'll ever realise.

Thanks to those of you that have shown me some support.
I plan on starting my own thread about my experience so far.

I mentioned briefly that we have received zero support from anyone (in a professional capacity.) It is truly disgraceful. We were given the diagnosis on the 14th February and have yet to be contacted by anyone offering advice, guidance or even just checking in with us to see how we are coping. We have been expected to just go away and wait. What we are waiting for I don't know. And I have not sat around waiting for support to come my way, I have been researching, phoning hospitals (at present I don't even know where my care will be as I have been passed backwards and forwards between craigavon and the royal). Have even been in contact with the health trust complaints department who agree that the treatment we have had is disgusting yet they can't point us in the direction of where to go for any different! There seems to be an awful lot of people who put their energy into protesting against abortion but I have yet to find any service or information on how to support those who cannot have an abortion and have to carry to term despite a fatal prenatal diagnosis! It is a fucking joke to be honest. I am fortunate that I have an amazing support network around me to help me cope but there are bound to be other families out there that aren't as lucky and are left high and dry. I apologise for being slightly off topic, I wanted to let those of you that responded to me know what my experience has been. Please look out for my thread when I post it, I want to make a difference for other families that may find themselves in my position. This is not acceptable and should not be allowed to happen.

And to be back on topic, YANBU, I am in belfast on Tuesday for an appointment at the royal and I am very tempted to go and speak to these protesters myself.

SauceForTheGander Thank you!

My daughter is now 10, her sister 5 & the baby that never was would be 4. I would never have coped.

Mouldypineapple Please, tell us what you think women who can't raise a child should do instead? What would be the better option. I am genuinely interested in this, because no one has ever given a viable answer yet, and they're certainly not willing to help personally.

different

My previous post didn't come out right.

What I meant was I support you - your post explains perfectly the horror of being pregnant when you don't want to be.

assassin I will look for your thread. In the meantime more

Only talk to the protesters if you feel strong enough to do so. Remember they are closed off to reason and you might get some bollocks response.

Evil, but at least we're not as bad as America. I have several American friends who work as clinic escorts and some of the stuff they hear and see is vile.

Did anyone see the article about pro-life 'Crisis Pregnancy Centres' lying to women, too? One woman was told having an abortion would turn her into a child abuser, these people are pure scum.

SauceForTheGander Your post was perfect, I understood it completely. I just didn't know what to say, because it touched me so much.

spuc pushed leaflets through our door (in the middle of the night) last year. I had just had my last round of fertility treatment fail and was on anti depressants. the arrogance of those people to send the misinformed information out made me so angry.
I kept the leaflet and when I felt strong enough sent it back to them with a really snotty letter. I said that because they had encroached on my property with there views I would on there's with mine. I know it wouldn't change there views ( like theirs didn't change mine) but I wanted them to see that I didn't agree or appreciate it. I did the same when the bnp shoved a leaflet through our letterbox. Makes my blood boil

Yes whambam they said abortions cause cancer, infertility and increased risk of being a child abuser. And what the fuck has Jeremy Hunt done? The NHS was still linked to them after Brooks exposed them. Hopefully that's been severed now after the radio 4 broadcast.

Nasty lies to intimidate the vulnerable and prevent them from making a legally sanctioned choice.

Assassin I am shocked and saddened at your situation. I wish you well and hope you find some support. My thoughts are with you.

In an ideal world these children would be given up for adoption. However I am fully aware the world is not ideal. Whilst I personally could not have an abortion I do understand that many people want them and therefore they will happen. Clearly it's best that it happens in a proper medical place rather than somewhere dirty with non-professionals.
I am not so naive that I cannot see that.

However it doesn't change my view. Abortion is of course hard for most people but it seems to be so much the norm, and easy to obtain.

I had an unwanted pregnancy when I was 17. The first thing my GP mentioned was abortion. This was not an option for me and now I have a beautiful adult daughter. We've had our share of tough times along the way, several years as a single parent but I've never for one second regretted keeping her when the possibility of abortion even then over 20 years ago was foisted upon me at the start. All options should be considered and explored, not just the straight to abortion that's the only way path. Things can look bleak but often things can work out better with the child than without and all the feelings that brings.

In an ideal world there'd be no unwanted pregnancies.

Mouldy an embryo isn't a person and I think you should research what happens to women in places where they do have personhood, because it's not just people seeking abortions personhood laws affect. They can affect all pregnant women.

Oh and not just pregnant women, it'd affect those attempting to prevent pregnancies and women wanting to have IVF too.

Mouldy - that's why we're pro choice. Don't you see how abhorrent it would have been for you to be forced to have an abortion? Forcing someone to continue with an unwanted pregnancy is the same thing.

Don't want an abortion - don't have one. Simple. But don't think your life experience gives you the right to tell other women what is the best choice for them.

Omg o was just about to mention the one im Belfast I work beside it and just wanna punch them when I walk past. I have resigned myself to giving them the finger when I walk past. Childish I know but it helps, im going to argue with them one day when im not late for work.

I live in the Republic and when faced with an unexpected pregnancy that I didn't think I could keep my doctor gave me the number and address of the Marie Stopes clinic in Dublin (for information on clinics in England), he apologised that he couldn't provide any abortion information himself because his clinic, he and his family would be targeted by these 'protesters'. He didn't want them following his kids to school and harassing them Anti abortion protesters are the only people in the country who are allowed to stalk, intimidate, harass and terrorise without consequence. Anybody else behaving as they do would be arrested immediately and dealt with, they're exempted for some insane reason.

Everybody should the freedom to have an opinion, publish it, share it with others in conversation, promote it in public and protest based on it but nobody should have the right to target individuals or groups for direct harassment or to inflict distress or intimidation.

Mouldypineapple

You had your daughter. You had an UNPLANNED pregnancy, not an unwanted pregnancy.

Unwanted means that you CANNOT proceed in any way shape or form. Unplanned means that you can proceed.

I am pleased that your daughter is loved by you. I myself was an unplanned & unwanted pregnancy. I have lived the legacy of my mother not loving me 40 odd years. I wouldn't wish it on any one.

In an ideal world these children would be given up for adoption.

You think this is an ideal situation? There are so many issues with adoption as well that it's far from ideal. Children wanting to know where they came from, why their parents could 'give them away', relinquishing parents never ceasing to wonder about where their child had gone, just to begin with. Adoption is not a perfect solution. Not to mention all the children who aren't seen as acceptable candidates because they're not perfect.
I'll go with what wham said "In an ideal world there'd be no unwanted pregnancies."

A friend of my mothers', who trained as a nurse in the 50's, said she could always tell when someone who'd had a backyard abortion was in, because they could smell them. This is not a better solution.

Technically we are all just a ball of cells...

I don't understand why adoption is often suggested as an alternative to abortion. Adoption is an alternative to child rearing, not pregnancy. Abortion is the only option for an unwanted pregnancy that a women cannot bear to go through. The idea that they should be forced to gestate a pregnancy to term and then hand the baby over with all that entails is the ultimate in treating women as incubators and very cruel.

In an ideal world these children would be given up for adoption.

How many people who suggest this have actually adopted any children themselves?

I am in America. There is a Planned Parenthood clinic on one of our main shopping streets. The town has recently ordered the protesters to leave a buffer zone between them and the clinic so that woman can get in and out without being harassed.

People who harass women outside clinics are disgusting bullies. If they want to change the law they could lobby their MPs, wave placards outside parliament, set up petitions... but that's not as satisfying for them as causing distress to vulnerable women.

Cross post, that sounds positive, weeble. Although they should ideally go and protest outside the state legislature.