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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to keep the buggie for 4year old DS?

175 replies

floppyfanjo · 07/03/2014 09:20

Off to the tip this weekend and was wondering if The pushchair should now go in the "going" pile ?

I've kept it up until now for emergency use eg if Ds is poorly and I need to get him to the Doc's etc.

Anyway we are off to Turkey in July (DS will be 4.6) and I'm thinking it may be useful in an evening or if we've got a long walk back from the beach etc.

DP thinks it should go and we wont end up using it anyway.

Would you keep it until after the holiday ?

OP posts:
WaitMonkey · 07/03/2014 09:52

I'd judge anyone who judge's people for a having a potentially school aged child in a buggy, as an idiot to be honest.
Yes, keep hold of it. But do charity shop it/ freeccycle it when you're done with it.

Original poster
floppyfanjo · 07/03/2014 09:55

Thanks - I haven't actually needed use it since last years holiday where it was very useful - carted beach stuff in on the way and DS jumped in on the way back when he was tired and it was hot.

Think I'll hang on to it until after the Holiday as I think I may kick myself if we've got a long walk to the beach or we fancy a late night.

Ps will definitely freecycle it after the holiday -Thanks for the suggestions.

OP posts:
maillotjaune · 07/03/2014 10:00

I've kept ours and DS3 is 4.4. So shoot me.

He didn't walk until just before 2, I don't drive, he has 2 big brothers so morning nursery plus a return trip to collect brothers from school.

Actually he hasn't used it since the last day of term before Christmas and last term he only used it for the pm collection but he often had a 30 minute nap in it. Guess what - DS2 used it all the way through school nursery and only gave up afternoon naps when he started reception.

Shock news - not all children are the same. OP do what you think is right for your family (but please recycle after).

TheGreatHunt · 07/03/2014 10:04

Those of you who are buggy judges, do you drive your children around? I use a buggy where many people would drive - ds will walk for a bit then hop in if he needs to or gets tired or Shock he needs a nap. He's 4.5.

petalunicorn · 07/03/2014 10:10

yep - I find smug non buggy users jump in their cars an awful lot, even just for a mile or two.

I do an awful lot of empty buggy pushing these days but on the occasions I need it, it's worth it - I can't carry my preschooler and I can be a few miles from home.

ifyourehoppyandyouknowit · 07/03/2014 10:17

We've just got to rid of ours and DS just turned two BUT I do use a sling when he gets tired. I just got got sick of of chasing after a toddler with an empty pushchair and wrestling him in when he was wouldn't cooperate.

gilmoregirl · 07/03/2014 10:28

DS was still in his buggy at age four. I think it very much depends on your lifestyle. If you walk miles every day then it makes sense to have a buggy. On holiday is certainly an occasion I would use a buggy with a four year old. It will be useful for naps and if you go out to eat a bit later. DS still had a long nap at that age and he did it in the buggy.

I always wonder about the amazing children of people who are shocked at three and four year olds in buggies. Can these children walk miles without moaning and whining? Must be great.

My sister and he husband would carry their children in their arms for miles rather than use the buggy. It took ages to get anywhere and then there was no where for the child to sleep.

Not at all unreasonable IMO : )

elfycat · 07/03/2014 10:32

Is anyone else going to miss their buggy for shopping? It's only half a mile to the nearest supermarket for me but I can 'carry' boxes of nappies, all the milk I need for a weekend (8-12 pints and all the meal ingredients. I couldn't physically carry it all and it saves running the car for these short trips.

Can someone please invent a trendy shopping trolley? One with an integral emergency child seat would be fab.

aGirlDownUnder1 · 07/03/2014 10:36

We kept ours till DD was 4, because we only had one car (DH normally had it) and my mum often looked after her, also she didn't start walking till 22 months.

As we were moving cities, it would be one less thing to bring and we didn't think we would need it anymore we got rid of it (which we didn't) as we then got two cars and DD was reasonable walker by then.

TisforTiger · 07/03/2014 10:37

My DD is 3.9 months, she is the only one who arrives at pre-school in a buggy. BUT we are the only ones who walk a long distance (30 mins) EVERYONE else drives. I find it crazy not the fact that my DD is in a buggy. She has just started to choose to walk and hopefully by the time we start school she will walk there and back.

HobbetInTheHeadlights · 07/03/2014 10:38

We don't drive but it used to annoy DH that eldest youngest in school year on long days out would want to slip into younger DC buggy at end of day - though I'd just move them round so we could get moving.

Younger DC were more hardy - and youngest would easily walk 6 miles into and out of town and all round with little bother.

However when we went on holiday with youngest at just under 3 half years we ended up having to hire a buggy after a few days.

Early starts, late nights and busy days she was exhausted and wanting carrying and would try and fall asleep on people but she was quite heavy and despite there being 4 adults it just got too much.

Wantsunshine · 07/03/2014 10:38

Mine used to moan if we had to walk miles but that seems to have eased off a bit. But then again I remember as a child moaning about walking when I was prob about 8 maybe older don't think my mum could have reverted to a buggy then!
I hadn't thought about naps at over 4 as mine doesn't as is somewhat of an insomniac.

I said I do judge up thread and am clearly an idiot but I found buggies to be really cumbersome and would rather carry my child if required.
I wouldn't use my car for a mile or two though.

Crowler · 07/03/2014 10:39

I don't have an issue with 4 year olds in a pushchair, but I think it's insane to not force them to walk a lot in order to tire themselves out. Life is much easier with a tired, compliant four year old.

HobbetInTheHeadlights · 07/03/2014 10:41

Is anyone else going to miss their buggy for shopping?

I still do - though we went for back packs on us all in the end - still shopping can be more difficult.

The shopping trolleys on busses are too cumbersome though you can get more modern fabric ones - I think even Ikea do them.

Crowler · 07/03/2014 10:44

Yes, the shopping! I occasionally took the pushchair shopping with me without my kids in it, but I felt too much like one of the insane people who have life-like baby dolls and had to give it up.

RedandChecker · 07/03/2014 10:45

I once had a heated exchange with a lady who was being very rude about four year olds in buggies. I've known a child who wasn't able to walk until 3 so long distances at 4 were a definate no. My DS is 4 and has an illness which means he falls unwell about once a month for a week at a time. During this time he is unable to walk, he is very tired and has no energy however as it happens so often life has to continue and I sometimes have to get to the shops or to the doctors and at this time the Buggy is a necessity for him. I get very judgy looks from other mums but I don't give a damn! People are so narrow minded I am not a bad mother or delaying development I am doing what needs to be done. When we went on holiday last summer I took the buggy for the evenings he fell asleep in it twice and it was useful for when we were late for our flight and had to run though the airport. We couldn't of carried him with our suitcases. If we had made him walk I am almost certain we would have missed our flight! Keep it for times of need and forget what other people think.

elfycat · 07/03/2014 10:46

Crowler IF you have a tired, compliant 4 year old I'd agree. But I had a tired stubborn, walk refusing, sit on the floor and refuse to budge with added risk of occasional tantrum 4 year old.

Who now walks nearly everywhere at 5. Just after Xmas she came down with chickenpox. As she descended into the illness we were out plague spreading at a tourist attraction. She was sobbing with tiredness/illness but kept putting one foot in front of the other until we got back to the car. I gave her an extra cuddle to say thanks as I needed her to walk and not be carried as I didn't have a spare hand with icy pathways and DD2 to watch. I was amazed that she walked, compares to how she'd have been last year.

MrsCakesPremonition · 07/03/2014 10:48

Just a quick idea for anyone who might be thinking about getting rid of a buggy in the near future - please consider donating it to your local Women's Refuge.

HobbetInTheHeadlights · 07/03/2014 10:50

Life is much easier with a tired, compliant four year old.

Depends on the DC - eldest would go for long time and very long walks then either stop and refuse to go further and would get hysterical if we walked on, whine constantly or throw a tantrum - I think she reached exhaustion levels.

At that point having an option of a buggy - getting other DC out or carrying smaller ones was easiest option.

As for carrying - could never do this for very long past about 2.5. We were often lugging bags round to - and both DH and I have bad backs. Even my exceptionally fit FIL who lugs heavy stuff round for work every day struggled for any length of time/distance past about 3.

Crowler · 07/03/2014 10:55

I wonder if my kids were hyperactive toddlers. I can't remember them ever being physically tired during the daytime (outside of illness). I had to exercise them like puppies.

JonathanGirl · 07/03/2014 10:56

Personally I would do anything to avoid having to take a buggy on a plane - an extra thing to carry as well as suitcases but if you are just getting straight into a hire car then I suppose it is no hassle.

If it isn't taking up valuable room at home, no reason not to hang on to it for a few more months and decide whether to take it with you at the time.

I used to regularly jump onto my brother's lap in the buggy at that age to get to school (I would leap off when we got near the school gates in case anyone saw me). But both my own children were total buggy refusers well before the age of three, just depends on the child.

If your ds would be happy to go in the buggy and it would make for a better and more relaxing holiday for everyone, then take it.

Funnyfoot · 07/03/2014 10:56

If I had read this post yesterday I probably wouldn't of commented as I didn't think I had an opinion.
However I have shocked myself with how instantly judgey I was when I saw a women at the supermarket with a child aged 5 in a buggy. I know the child as she is in the class below DD so no health problems. My instant reaction was Shock. I did then reprimand myself for hoisting up my judgey pants so quickly but it is still giving me this face Shock.

Original poster
floppyfanjo · 07/03/2014 11:19

Funnyfoot - Maybe the child is ill and mum had taken to Doc's or needed to get emergency supplies.

I certainly wouldn't make an ill weak child walk if I had I could pop them in a buggie in such an emergency...................

OP posts:
Funnyfoot · 07/03/2014 11:25

The child was at school that day and there again this morning. She is not an ill child. Runs around the play ground before school ect. Like I said I don't normally make snap judgements and it did shock me how quickly I judged the mother on this occasion.

vikinglights · 07/03/2014 11:27

I distinctly remember the holiday that I pushed 5 week old ds and 2 year old dd2 around in the double pram with 4 year old DD1 sitting on the hood/handlebar for a fair bit of the time. I could have marched her up a mountain with no bother but she found a warm city exhausting.