Please come and tell me your coping mechanisms for awful in laws.

[Amazonite]

Hi, all advice will be gratefully received here! My in laws the female ones anyway tend to put me down at family gatherings very subtle things that I would look petty for defending myself on.

I get really cross and simmer under the surface and find it really difficult to have a good time and be happy after they have made their comments. All the while they are the life and soul getting louder and more outgoing and I just end up looking like a moody cow.

To goad me they ask me what's wrong and am I ok?? How can I not let this get to me and just have a good time no matter what they do?

I love mine except for one. She is bitchy and a snob.

It is awful but I just grit my teeth and don't start conversations but answer politely if she does.

I don't visit so only hav to meet at family functions.

My survival tips:
Limited contact.
Keep busy when you see them. E.g, wash up, make cups of tea, pop to the shops for something urgent.
Keep conversation about the children only. If MIL starts to slag people off and gossip, I distract her.
But, be honest when necessary, as after all she is a role model for my children. So, when she says, 'girls don't play in mud/wear trousers/build towers or some other nonsense, I say something like, 'it's 2014 you know!!'
Store up all the annoyances and let rip to someone about twice a year. It's cathartic!

Or act like they are saying it nicely and overkill with niceness in the response.

Cost one "it's so nice of you to ask, I love it, it's so wonderful that we can afford these things, thanks soooo much for asking"

Sister. "Its so lovely that you are worried about my sister, how interesting you felt that, no one else saw it, I will definitely check she's ok, thank you for asking!"