to be so upset? GP surgery told me I would be removed from their list if I don't have a smear test

[veryworried29]

Namechanging uber-regular here.

I received a text from my GP surgery which said "Please confirm address by phone. If not you will be removed from surgery list."

I rang immediately and was told that if I don't come in for a smear test then I will be struck off the surgery list!

Dh and I have been with this surgery for 18 years and our children since they were born.

I don't feel I need a smear test. We very rarely have sex and when we do it is always with a condom. I have had years of clear smears before me.

I find them horrifically unpleasant, in the same way that some people are phobic about the dentist, infact think I may have a form of vaginismus (sp?) hence the lace of piv sex.

Tbh, it almost feels like I must agree to be raped (sorry for emotive language, but this is how it feels to me) in order to keep a place at my GP surgery.

I cannot begin to describe how upset I am about this. There have been tears.

I'd be grateful if you could bear this in mind when replying ... I know this is aibu, but I do feel I have a genuine aibu to run past you all with this one.

I honest to goodness don't understand why some people get so hysterical over another woman's considered choice not to have smears.

I have a chronic kidney condition. I remember my consultant saying to me that one of the surgeries I've had was worth doing as I am mid 30s. He remarked that he'd seen a man the previous week who was in his seventies and had elected not to have it, despite the fact that it could well have prolonged his life.

The surgeon was totally accepting of the fact that this man decided to have a (possibly) shorter life without invasive treatment.

For some women - perhaps only a few - the experience of a smear is either exceptionally painful or carries a high mental health cost. So, if you are low risk, you add up the odds and decide that you will take certain good over the small chance of developing cancer in the future.

Do some women regret that choice? I guess they do. Probably not as many as regret drinking too much or eating too many take aways though!

People make different choices because their circumstances are different. Seriously, get over it!

And yes, bullying a woman who has capacity into allowing you to stick a foreign object into her vagina even if you believe it is for her good is a form of assault. Coerced medical procedures are not allowed and are totally unethical.

Women can decide they don't want a smear, or indeed any other procedure, regardless of whether they have suffered a special assault if any kind. Those of you advising to OP gets a grip could do with cutting back on your hysterical reaction to another adult making different decisions to you.

OP I hope you are not upset by some of the really nasty posts on here.

yes, revoltingpeasent.

I do hope that all the nasty posters on here NEVER smoke/drink/ have super healthy BMIs and exercise for an hour a day/check their breasts daily ..avoid the car..

We all choose our risks and we do it for mental health and ease of life. I choose to enjoy a takeaway and a drink. It's not ideal.. but my life is better for it (although potentially shorter because of it!)

Damn auto correct - should have said a 'sexual assault of any kind' not a special assault (wtf?)

Good job A&E doctors don't go saying to patients :-

"I think you were foolish to drive a car/ride a bicycle/go skiing/get on a horse/climb a ladder/walk on an icy pavement/cross a road/get pregnant and have complications etc. etc."

I'm not advocating against people's will, but 80% of the population carry the HPV virus that causes most cervical cancers. Most people can fight it off, but illness or anything can cause low immunity and cancer.

I'd google and see if there's a service for people who are terrified or have been raped, there must be specialist help for them.

Cervical cancer is becoming more prevalent, which is why vaccines are being used. Any doctor who says you have a very small risk is full of poo. I was low risk, yet went every three years, and after a bereavement and stress my next smear test was stage 1b1- NOT CIN which is pre cancerous. I had alymphadectomy, three cm of my vagina removed, and was off work for weeks due to complications. I also had a urinary drain at home for two weeks. I'm lucky I didn't need chemo. If you can't get help to overcome this fear, if you do develop cc are you going to leave it untreated? Because the treatment is 1000 times worse than a smear test.

My dd(19) has been vaccinated now. Since my surgery I've been off work more than there I'm damn lucky. I've had two adhesions ops, a slipped disc, due to supporting ligaments being removed, bowel adhesions, and a bowel impaction. A smear takes minutes- I've been dealing with this for three years- oh and been told I'm considered cured in 10 years.

I feel pretty abused. This week I had another general anaesthetic to check lesions on my bowel I'm praying its not cancer. Please I'm not demeaning your fear, take someone with you, ask for a lady doctor, take diazepam,just please go.x

No way my child will be having that vaccine, and again, I say that as someone who had CIN and whose other daughter died of cancer.

They don't even know how long it lasts. It doesn't cover all strains of HPV and we don't even know if some can cause cell changes or not.

Scaring people by saying stress causes cervical cancer is so irresponsible!

I lost my CHILD and had had clear smear tests since.

Expat sorry for ur loss

low risk and no risk are not the same things shona. You had some risk, op realises that, she thinks it's not as important as her sanity

VeryWorried I've read the thread and completely support your choice, I hope you are not too upset. It's your body which you have agency. Full stop.

I hope you get a decent reply from the email you send.

Expat sorry for your loss, I agree with you neither of my daughter's have had the vaccine.

Some of the posts on this thread have been shocking. Ever single person has the right to refuse whatever they see fit to refuse. The OP explained she was upset, some of you should have respected that instead of adding to this.

good luck Very

just wanted to say that the OP has the absolute right not to have any medical procedure offered and the surgery absolutely does not have the right to refuse treatment because of it.

It is totally disgusting that people have posted saying anything other than this.

Have read the thread, the OP and subsequent follow ups.

Reminds me of "I may not agree with your opinion but I will defend to the death your right to say it."

OP - I may not agree with your decision regarding smear tests but I would defend to the hilt (death seems a little extreme) your right to refuse them. Autonomy over your own body is paramount.

You mention years of clear tests previously, and childbirth - which do require internal examinations - were these as traumatic as the thought of this? I don't mean to pry and obviously I don't want you to feel pressured to disclose your psychosexual history on MN!

However if you would like a smear test but are too terrified of the procedure it is definitely possible to have them under a GA with a supportive team who will introduce themselves by name before you are put under and who can keep staffing in theatre to a minimum (no students / observers / spare runners) and guarantee to bar access to anyone else while you're there. I do a gynae list once a week where there are occasionally patients who would like screening but for various medical or psychological reasons need a GA to help them through it. Apologies if this is out of turn to suggest (mindful of a poster above who said agreeing to sedation would be facilitating her own trauma).

Draconis that was me, but how thoughtful of you to suggest it to the OP. I think I am a weirdo control freak with my anti sedation thing

What a strange thread.

OP your GP has no right to off list you if you decline to have a smear test. All they need to do is enter an informed dissent code onto their system. You will still continue to be invited for smears every 3 years though.

Lots of women choose not to have smears for a variety of different reasons. As long as you have weighed up the pros and cons - ie you have made an informed decision - then that is fine.

Your chances of getting cervical cancer will remain the same - it is just the risk of later detection and worse outcome if you do get cancer that is increased.

I think you are right to complain. Removal from the list should not be used to bully patients in this way and I say that as a GP.