self entitled middle class??

[sweetsoulsister]

As an 'out of towner' can people explain why the middle class in this fine city of London feel they are so god damned righteous?

I'm standing in a queue with my children at the local swimming pool, and judging by the car park, it's busy. We go in and join a long queue. A couple of the families in front of me take their turn at the counter, turn around in disgust, and pace back and forth, argue with each other and work themselves up into a frenzy. Assuming they are going swimming I ask what has happened with the pool. One of the ladies says, 'The pool is at capacity and if we want to go in we will have to wait until someone leaves,' her voice rises another octave and she continues, 'This is completely unacceptable!!'

Really? Unacceptable? If you were the first family in the pool and it got too crowded because they let everyone in would you just suck it up because it's unacceptable to let everyone in?

This is not the first time I've encountered this outrage and it always seems to be what I've deemed the 'self entitled middle class...'

Explanations please???

[Philoslothy]

I swear that every time I do that survey I get a different answer. Today I am elite? That will do.

[Bogeyface]

Oh come on!

The OP is not from the UK, doesnt understand the class system that we all claim doesnt exist, asked about it and made a mistake. Can we not just give her a break instead of making her think we are all nutters and/or bitches?! :o

[MrsKoala]

It is possible to be middle class and fairly poor

Yes definitely. When i grew up in a v. MC area all the MC people had way less money than the WC. It's what you spend it on and prioritise and your job, education, food you ate and attitude that defined you. Ie a school teacher driving a banger, holidaying in south of france who made their own houmous vs an Electrician driving a new car and holidaying in the costa del brit who ate sliced white bread. The latter (my family) would have more money but not be middle class.

[Chippednailvarnish]

I always thought that your class was determined by your father's profession...

[steff13]

What class are you?

I'm established middle class, per the quiz.

Here in the US, my family is what we call "upper middle income." I think we think of things a bit differently here; when I think of "classes," I think solely of income, not really behavior or anything. That could be unique to me, though.

[Bogeyface]

Elite is not the word I would use...

[Sweetart]

Would everyone stop pretending that the UK is the only place on earth that has a class system. I've grown up in Europe,and as OP claims to be foreign,she knows very well how things work,all over the world.

[Philoslothy]

It's not a word that I would use to describe myself either , I was being sarcastic and making the point that these surveys are often quite meaningless,

Lucky is a better description.

[Bogeyface]

Types of behaviour is definitely more important than money.

Anything deemed "common" is not MC, which is why you get the "chav" label for someone who can afford designer but doesnt have the taste that the MC deem acceptable dontchaknow.

[Bogeyface]

I was thinking "Jammy" actually, but lucky is probably politer :o

[Philoslothy]

I am sure that by MN standards I would be seen as a chav. I am sure people think I lack class.

I wouldn't be so rude as to accuse someone of lacking class, perhaps that reflects my own lack of social "niceties"

[Philoslothy]

I am fine with jammy as well.

[sweetsoulsister]

volestair - i think you've summed up what I have encountered since being here - if you don't know you are not entitled to know, the smugness, the closed door, why not just let me know? I might be really open and willing to learn, to grow, to appreciate a different culture.

volestair - thank you for posting. It is unlike me to post something so volatile and I have to admit, my heart was pounding reading through all these responses, but your comment has made me realise what my real issue is, the real problem I have encountered living in London amongst this 'middle class', few want to admit it exists, but many use it to ostracise and exclude and bully those who don't fit. Why aren't you obliged to explain it to me when I am sincerely asking what it is when it is pointed out that I don't know... Bullying at it's finest.

[Mimishimi]

I only think people lack class when they think far too much about what class they and complete strangers they don't know anything about might belong to

[thinking101]

Well its obvious they should use their middle class incomes to join a private gym with a pool.

'A twat is a twat'

Did they have their swimmng gear in a Waitrose carrier bag instead of a battered Aldi bag for life?

Mayeb they should ust get their arses out of bed sooner to get a place in the pool. Twats

[Bogeyface]

Well isnt the U and Non U thing about how the MC invented things to differentiate themselves from the WC, yet turned out that they also distanced themselves from the UC that they were trying emulate?

Napkins V Serviettes, Loo v Toilet etc

I dont lack class, I just lack money.

I would rather lack class Swap ya Philos?!

[MrsKoala]

Apparently according to the quiz i am 'Established MC'. Which is bollox. The questions are too culture heavy. So just because i studied the arts and have worked in the arts i answered in a MC way. If they had asked other questions, not about Opera etc, it would probably have come out differently for me.

There are of course shades of MC too. There's the liberal MC hippy types living in Brighton and there are the Daily Telegraph Tory voting types living in Surrey. They would also answer those questions differently but i would argue are still both solidly MC.

[sweetsoulsister]

Mimi - couldn't care less about where I belong, just asking a psychological question about why it matters and why people act the way they do.

[freelancegirl]

I don't think you describing the MC as: 'Middle class - self-made, new money, desperately wants to distance themselves from the lower class, doesn't quite fit into the upper class, inferiority complex ensues, freaks out because local swimming pool can not accommodate' is merely being inquisitive OP. It wasn't very pleasant and I think that's what has got some people's backs up.

[JassyRadlett]

Honestly, OP, I reckon you'd find it much, much more interesting if you did a bit more reading on the class system in Britain as your interpretation is very wide of the mark (as is the idea that there is a homogeneous middle class).

I find it curious that you're interested in psychology and the class system but aren't interested in your part in it - or have I misunderstood?

[Monty27]

Because we're all different and act differently. At least there was no effing and blinding.

I really can't see what class has got to do with it. No-one likes waiting.

[Apatite1]

I came out as elite in that quiz. Only thing I liked about that is that I apparently mix with a variety of social classes, which is true!

I don't think entitlement is a middle class thing: it's more a reflection of the person's individual (not very nice) character.

[Philoslothy]

I don't see self made or new money as an insult. If I wanted to get in a public pool and it was full I would probably freak out.

[Mimishimi]

SSS - how did anything in the woman's behaviour at the pool indicate to you that this was a class issue though? Perhaps she was just fed up after waiting 90 minutes in a queue ... did she name-drop, did she try to threaten the staff with social influence to get ahead of everyone else? Some people think they're special and the mundane problems which affect everyone else should not in their case - that has nothing to do with class.