about visiting in laws while pregnant

[toddlewaddleflipflop]

I'm nearly 30 weeks pregnant with a baby who has a serious health condition that will need surgery in the first few weeks of life. My MIL is wanting us to visit (to stay in a b&b near them as they really don't have space for us). They live in the middle of nowhere, 2-3 hours drive from the hospital the baby needs to be born in, and with no hospital that can provide the specialist care baby needs any nearer. My first baby was born at 36 weeks. Its about 3.5 hours drive from our house to theirs and we would have our three year old with us. AIBU to not want to go? I feel bad as, though I've said no, she was crying on the phone to DH just now...

If it makes any difference, we drove even further to visit them at other relatives house at Christmas. We've said they are welcome to come here, though health issues for stepFIL make it difficult, though not impossible, for them to travel.

YAdefNBU! Just be careful with your baby and yourself! If you want to text or call, I like Flank 's wording.

Jesus, what is wrong with her?

Fwiw, I am 32 weeks and my in laws live 3 hours away. We haven't visited them at all in his pregnancy due to sickness and now I'm getting twitchy as my ds arrived at 36 weeks and I want to be at home just incase. My inlaws are grown ups and they totally understand.

I can't believe your mil is reacting that way, especially as your baby will need medical attention at birth. Some people are so self centred it's insane.

She's being vvvvv unreasonable. She shouldn't cry on the phone, that kind of emotional blackmail just isn't on.

Haha thanks Rhuba, I've had alot of practice!

You shouldn't go. At this point in time it is your health and that of your child that is the most important and you need to be in the right place.

This is the time when your DH must put you both first and be straight with his mother and emphasise his concern for your well being.

No need to compromise in any way! You have invited her to yours if she really wants to see you on this one occasion maybe she could arrange to overcome the difficulties her end.