To ask how late you would be before you let hosts know you were running late.

[drivingmisslazy]

Invited aunt round for dinner, she text me earlier and asked what time, I said 5, dinner 5.30. Its now almost 5.30 and have heard nothing and they not here.

I said to dh I would text if I am going to be more than 10/15 mins late, he said he would probably leave it a bit longer, just wondered what others would do.

I would text if I realised I was not going to be there at the time it was agreed I would.

I would text or phone as soon as I knew I was going to be late.

15 minutes late is not polite - it's rude. Whatever etiquette book that came from is wrong and should be binned immediately.

I would text the minute I knew I wasn't going to be on time and if I didn't know how late I would be, I would explain this, apologise and give a rough indication of when I would arrive.
Its good manners and common courtesy surely.

Polite lateness is not being on the doorstep 5 minutes early when I am running around tidying and putting mascara on!

If you are not ready for your guests at the time you tell them to arrive then surely you are late then?

I think so, JR. If I am expecting someone then everything is ready at least half an hour before they are due to arrive (food obv timed to be ready when needed). I hate last minute rushing around. Stresses me out.

I was always told it is polite to be a little bit late when going to someone's house.
But I would classify that as being around 3-4 minutes late, not 15.
I don't like knocking on someone's door on the dot, I'd probably dawdle a little once I was nearly there until a couple of minutes had elapsed. Hope all my friends don't think I'm rude and always late :(

Polite lateness. Seriously? That is not, EVER a thing.

If you're a host you're on time i.e. you're tidied, dressed etc for the time you told people to arrive.

If you're a guest you're on time i.e. you arrive when you're asked to arrive.

Anything coming up that will cause a delay should be communicated immediately with an eta.

I'd text/call as soon as I knew I was going to be late.

3-4 minutes late is fine, but no need to be late for politeness! If i say 5, if you turn up at 5-to i wouldn't think 'how rude', id think brilliant, they are on time. A few minutes either side is ok.

If I was going to be any more than 15 mins late I would send a text apologising. I can't stand people being late, it possibly unreasonably infuriates me.

I would text if I was going to be more than 5 minutes late.

There is no such thing as 'polite lateness'. You just can't put 'being late', and 'polite' in the same sentence.

MIL did this to us on Christmas Day. We told her to arrive at 11 so we could open presents before other guests arrived. She called at 10.45 to say she was running "half an hour" late so to expect her by 11.30 (she lives a 20 min drive away). We heard nothing more from her until she showed up at 12.30 and breezed in saying "sorry I'm a bit late"

Really - I thought everyone knew the 15 minute rule.... It's only for social occasions at people's houses, not meeting out. I'm quite anal about timekeeping too, so I'm always exactly 15 minutes late for lunches, dinner parties etc. I would never, ever arrive at a drinks party at someone's house at the time on the invitation and I would be a bit if someone turned up to mine at the time stated.

I quite like "8 for 8.30" invitations though, in which case I would arrive at 8.25.

The 'unwritten rule' was written by those who can't be bothered to be on time.

As far as the excuse of being late to allow the host/hostess to 'be ready', why on earth would someone issue an invite for a certain time and then plan on 'not being ready' to receive their guests. I understand that there are unforeseen occurrences, but I also know that most on-time guests are either only too happy to pitch in and help if they can or would be happy to pour themselves a little something and wait for the host/hostess to set things to rights. No one I know would be upset or insulted over an unavoidable delay.

I hate the 8 for 8.30 thing. I never know then when I am supposed to turn up and always just end up saying, please give me an actual time.

I've never heard of polite lateness, then again, I don't have friends who would be frazzled to see me at the door at the time that I was asked!