Sleepovers During Term Time

[Bookworm13]

Hi Folks,

Do you think AIBU? My eldest son (13) has been invited for a sleepover to a friend's next weekend for one night. I was on the point of saying no, only during school hol time but he really wants to go and then my DH said I wasn't being fair, so I very reluctantly said ok.

It's just I've spoken to alot of parents in the area and they said there seems to be a growing trend for kids and their sleepover mates to be allowed to stay up till all times. Alot of these parents, as a result, have banned term time sleepovers.

One of my friends had the weekend from hell just recently, after allowing her ten year old to sleep over at her mate's house.

When she went to collect her child the next morning, she said her DD looked like a zombie and promptly burst into floods of tears on the way home. Turns out they were allowed to sit up all night and she ended up not going to bed till 3am!

My friend said it took her DD almost all weekend to recover and she was exhausted, screaming and throwing strops, which isn't like the LO at all. Needless to say, her and her DH have banned her from any more sleepovers unless it is school hols and they said there will be no more 3am bedtimes!

My son isn't usually a moody boy but he does need his sleep and the last thing I want, is him coming home exhausted!

I don't want to upset anyone or embarrass my son, but I've heard so many horror stories recently about exhausted kids after sleepovers - how should I handle it? Should I try to drop a polite hint to the other boys parents that I don't mind him sitting up a bit later but that I'd prefer it if he didn't pull an all-nighter?!

Thank you.

Well I've just sent ds to school looking like a zombie and feeling really ill from lack of sleep. Apparently they didn't sleep at all on sat night. I know he's not going to learn anything today I feel like saying no to the next one bit I don't think I could actually do it. I'd feel he was missing out too much.

Accept the fact that at 13 they're going to do their utmost not to sleep.

We tend not to allow sleepovers in term-time, but they do happen occasionally. When they do, the DC are sent to bed for a few hours when they get home or when their friends have left, and they're warned they're not allowed to be moody when they eventually get up.

When DS1 does weekend sleepovers, he still manages to get to the newsagents at 7.30 am for his paper-round, and neither DS is allowed a sleepover before a football match.

YABVU. Why give him something trivial to rebel against?

I allow term time sleepovers occasionally, one maybe two within the term. DD1(11) will stay up until crazy o clock and get up early. But every so often, that won't harm her.
I also warn her not to be grumpy and moody after sleepover, or consequence will be no more term time sleepovers. That threat works well for us.