aibu to feel slightly on edge when I come across women in the full black burka?

[caroleharolde]

I just always feel slightly threatened, I know the vast majority of Muslims are lovely nonviolent people but.just this sight always unnerve me. Be honest, who hadn't felt a bit uncomfortable when passing by a huddle of the burqa wearers? Not trying to be racist, I'd feel the same if it were Christians or Jews or any other religion wearing it.

Catholics do not cover their faces, that went out years and years ago. It was more like a very small veil anyway.

Baies74 - sunglasses don't obscure a face but they do prevent eye contact and I gain an awful lot of cues from eye contact. Most people don't bother to raise their sunglasses when talking (I know some people have glasses that darken, they are just as difficult but I do understand that they wouldn't be able to see if they took them off!). Thank you for removing yours when you speak

Funnily enough, this thread has reminded me off a friend I had at Uni who was blind. I really struggled because I couldn't get clues from her eyes (I've also had problems with people who have other problems with their eyes) - I didn't ignore her but I always felt embarrassed at my difficulty. Sorry.. OTT!

op I know what you are getting at, but still yabu.
anyone can dress as they like in the country, which is something to be very grateful for.

You do know they're not ninjas?

If I lived in France I'd wear an indicator that I wasn't sexually available to every random froggie who ways to cop a feel, invade my personal space and ask sleezy questions.

but why threatened? don't feel that. do feel a little sad that a woman feels the need to cover her body and face this way but as long as it's her choice then it's her choice.

Hmmm, don't seem to remember seeing any in the 70's when I grew up either.

Melika, I never saw it growing up but I do see it now in London, certainly on Sundays. There's a very old school church near me, and the women wear thick lace or even wool veils.

I'm not sure if this is reactionary, or just fashion.

Bluesky- I agree
whatever the motivation of the poster discussion is not possible with all the usual piling in of FO and assumptions made
And whoever suggested starting this on the feminist board NO don't go there
I tried a discussion (different issue) and expected a genuine discussion and was shot down in flames
I was in a very low place at the time and was made to feel even worse

"Muslim women who completely cover up are fairly obviously not inviting conversational approaches from those around them. I think one message is - keep away from me"

I think for some who born in the UK to fairly moderate families, it could be a political statement. For some they are just experimenting and perhaps even rebelling. I can imagine a lot a women form overseas who if they grew up covering up in public would probably find it weird and very uncomfortable to not cover.

I feel not threatened but uncomfortable about women wearing it and who made the decision they should wear it
One of my closest friends is Muslim and she will defend it to the death. Its a subject we avoid because she says it is worn to protect women and I know she would consider a woman in a short skirt as 'available'
Perhaps this is wrong but in order to keep our friendship we have an unspoken agreement to avoid talking about it

Shandy I have a Bangladeshi friend who grew up there not covering up, even with a niqab, and finds it very disturbing to be expected to do so in West London.

Just because France have banned it, it doesn't mean we should. There are countries that ban women having an education - you wouldn't dream of banning that here.

I deal with a fair number of women who wear face coverings when I am at work. Although it is something I don't really understand I try to respect it. I have a collleague who will refuse to speak to the husband and it makes the woman uncomfortable. I take the lead from them. If the husband is doing all the talking I let it happen. As part of the process I have to see the womans face. I always ask if they want to go to a private room for that part of the process. I am always told yes.

We might not understand it and we might feel it's oppressive which in our culture it is. The people I deal with at work have all come to the uk from another country. It is what they are used to and to stop these women wearing face coverings in public could mean they can't leave the house and they would then be even more isolated.

We live in a country that on the whole welcomes diversity and other cultures and religions. I don't think we should start saying we don't/won't accept part of these cultures and religions.

I see your point on the identity side but I don't think you need to feel on edge they're not going to jump you

Islam is not a race - it's a religion, an ideology. Asking about it, or even criticising it is not racist.

For a website full of women who pride themselves on their liberal leanings, it's never ceases to amaze me how few of you actually understand what "racism" is.

It's also amazing that, given how you pretty much all consider yourselves feminists, you're so blase about the most visible form of female suppression that it's possible to see.

Oh - it's their culture, innit? They've chosen to "preserve their modesty" this way.

Oh, really? How many of you would choose to preserve your modesty by walking around in a tent? How many of you even think you should have to preserve your modesty? That'll be none.

Some choices are not actually choices at all, are they - not when people have been brainwashed into them since birth. That's not a choice.

I'll accept entirely that the burqua is not a misogynistic form of suppression the very moment that someone adequately explains why men are not required to wear them to "preserve their modesty".

Why don't some of you learn a little something about the doctrine of Islam. Take the trouble to find out about what happens to some women in Islamic countries who dare to go out without wearing their burqua (or without their husband's permission to even set foot outside the door).

Learn about how Islam preaches that women are owned by their husbands, about how their testimony is worth half of that of any man, about how rape can only be prosecuted if there are 5 male witnesses. Learn about how a man is permitted to strike his wife if he can demonstrate good cause.

I've already learned these things - and I am reminded of them every time I see a woman in a burqua. It saddens me, and it should sadden everyone who genuinely gives a shit about others.

baies74 - "Shandy I have a Bangladeshi friend who grew up there not covering up, even with a niqab, and finds it very disturbing to be expected to do so in West London."

I expect she would as it isn't her custom and how she was brought up. Having visited and spent some time in a few Muslim countries I can understand why some women use it as a form of protection and not to draw attention to themselves.

You don't mean a burqa you mean a niqab. If you're going to insult it then at least know what you are talking about! You have never seen anyone wearing a burqa in the uk.
You need to educate yourself on Islam and find out why you feel afraid not just blindly accept your own prejudice.

And I still have never seen a burkha in the UK and I live in quite a diverse large town.

Fair point, Shandy.

Islam is often erroneously conflated with veil-wearing for women and of course there are geographically-specific cultural as well as religious reasons for wearing, or not wearing, the veil.

yes but it is quite acceptable to say you find the full face and body covering sad or uncomfortable. doesn't mean you are racist or anti Muslim it is just a point if view and as valid as anyone else's.

my teen dds are nonplussed when we go into our local city where there are a fair few women completely covered up. they have asked me why they do this and I have no answer.

however we concluded that they choose to have belly buttons pierced and wear crop tops which are their choice while other women have other choices.

the attitude that western women not covering up are 'available' as a poster said her Muslim friend thinks is however very very disturbing.

Come to London, Shandy, they're not unusual at all.

Box please could you clarify for us? When I say burqa I mean the full black robe and the full face veil, is that wrong?

Whereas I'd call the scarf a niqab?

FancyAShandy seriously? never seen a burkah?

come to Birmingham, take the A38 to Soho road in Handsworth.

if you do go to 'The Factory' absolutely beautiful Shari material. gorgeous scarfs, me and dds love love it.