To think my Dad could have just said 'I'm busy' (light hearted but gross)

[Danann]

Just called my parents and got 'hey, your little brothers and sisters are out so your mum and i are being intimate on the sofa, can I call you back?' I accept my parents have sex but did I really need that image in my head? how will I ever be able to sit on their sofa again?

Its fun embarrassing the kids! I have teens. We were all in the car the other day and I asked DP what he wanted for his birthday. Clothes... money... blow job? They were all "Eeew!" Apparently DS17 is never kissing me on the mouth again! Its great when your DCs are more mature than you are!

Despite the fact my mother used to keep her diaphragm and tube of spermicidal gel in the bathroom cupboard where we all saw it, and we knew where the copy of the Joy of Sex was kept, she maintained that they only did it twice, once for me and once for my sister.

And I was quite happy to maintain that myth.

Since he died my mum has regaled me with details from hers & Dad's sex life - urgh - quite horrible about him always making sure she came first & how he was impotent after surgery so they had to do "other things" bleurgh = vomit face

I really am no prude but I just din't want to know!

*don't not din't

And she had a pair of crotchless knickers apparently

Apples you are allowed your 'inappropriate lusts' because you're not my mum.