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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

to think this is far too early to start weaning?

77 replies

hestergraysgarden · 19/01/2014 17:15

I met a friend of a friend at a christening party yesterday. Her (very lovely) baby was born at 28 weeks and is now 11 weeks old, so is still a week away from reaching term. They are already giving her pureed vegetables and rusks!

DS is six months old and has only just started on puree. I'm not going to try him on finger foods for another month or so.

I didn't say anything to her as I would never usually criticise a new mum, knowing full well what it feels like to get unsolicited advice from strangers. But I'm a bit worried that she might be unwittingly causing her baby harm as it doesn't seem like they have spoken to their health visitor or midwife - they said she just wasn't satisfied by her formula anymore and had stopped sleeping through (it just sounds like a growth spurt to me).

Is it safe for a premature baby to be weaned so early? I don't know if I should try and raise the issue next time I see her or just leave it.

Sorry. Got myself a bit nattered.

OP posts:

perplexedpirate · 19/01/2014 18:41

Weaning at 6 months is something to be smug about?
I've been wasting smugness for 5.5 years!

theborrower · 19/01/2014 20:21

I always understood that the (now) recommended age for weaning was 6 months, but if you decided to wean earlier than this you should never wean before 17 weeks.

Just found this helpful guide www.healthpromotionagency.org.uk/Resources/nutrition/pdfs/Weaning%20made%20easy.pdf

I don't know about prem babies though, but would hope that they'd seek advice from a health professional in any case. It does sound very, very early.

DollyHouse · 19/01/2014 20:24

What does not introducing finger foods at six months do? Why is it wrong?
(Genuine question)

WilsonFrickett · 19/01/2014 20:48

Preem babies often do wean early though.

Thurlow · 19/01/2014 20:52

And what does delaying finger food past six months do?

Please tell me it means they are terrible eaters. So that I can inform my very well eating 2yo that not being interested in finger food until 9mo means she should stop eating now...

PerpendicularVince · 19/01/2014 20:57

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster

hestergraysgarden · 19/01/2014 20:58

To be honest SoftlySoftly I'm winging it slightly so welcome the advice!

I didn't mean to sound smug about 'making it' to six months - actually I got a bit of a telling off on the weaning board when I thought he might be ready for weaning at 4 1/2 months, which is in part what informed my (private) reaction when she told me she was weaning. I got lots of advice about early weaning from older relatives so thought that could also be the case with this lady.

I'm not judging her - she seems lovely. I was just worried.

OP posts:

TodayIsAGoodDay · 19/01/2014 21:03

It's a shame that some people think that potentially offending a friend is riskier than standing by and letting a baby's health be endangered.

PedlarsSpanner · 19/01/2014 21:36

Yanbu to be concerned but not a lot you can do or say

My DN, born to term, was weaned onto solids at nearly 12 weeks last year, they have pretty awf tummy probs now at coming up to a year old, movicol+lactulose prescribed. Utterly preventable. The baby apparently was ever so advanced so they started the child then. Pair of twats.

MeepMeepVrooooom · 19/01/2014 21:42

My DD was 12 weeks when she had her first puree. She needed it, she was a hungry baby. And still is a very hungry toddler now.

Don't know if it is any different for prem babies but it's none of your business. She's a Mum and you have no right to question the choices she makes. You wouldn't like it if she raised something you did with you baby with you. Sorry, I just don't get why people think it's ok to question peoples parenting decisions with them.

LynetteScavo · 19/01/2014 21:47

I have weaning threads hidden, I can't get as worked up as other people about anything but milk passing a babies lips before they are six months.

But this does sound ridiculously early. I wonder how they even get the food down the baby...sounds very messy and vegetables are hardly going to fill the baby up more than milk, so I really don't see the point.

So, no YANBU to think it's early.

PedlarsSpanner · 19/01/2014 21:50

Ah Meepers, there are more calories in infant milk than purees or sodding baby rice

But yes, you know your bubs, hun.

QOFE · 19/01/2014 21:51

But if its recommended to wean prem babies early due to low iron stores.... then rusks and vegetable puree are hardly going to help with that, are they? You'd have thought that formula with its added iron would be a better bet until their digestive system was mature enough to handle high iron foods like egg yolk, red meat, dried fruit, green leafy veg etc.

MeepMeepVrooooom · 19/01/2014 21:51

Pedlars I didn't decrease milk. This was as well as. I think it's each to their own to be honest.

QOFE · 19/01/2014 21:52

Obv breastmilk would be the ideal due to high bioavailability of the iron it contains, but am assuming they are FFing. Apols if wrong.

WeddingComingUp · 19/01/2014 21:52

Ah Meepers, there are more calories in infant milk than purees or sodding baby rice

Very often, weaning a baby is not done for the purpose of increasing calories, so that's a moot point.

We really struggled to get ds1 to 17 weeks before beginning weaning. He was weaned with the intent of reducing calories, not increasing.

BonaDea · 19/01/2014 21:54

I agree with you OP, it sounds crazy. At 11 weeks I doubt the baby can hold his or her head up so how on earth you can safely feed solids I don't know!!

The advice is abundantly clear on this issue and people choose to ignore it in a misguided effort to get more sleep!!

Pobblewhohasnotoes · 19/01/2014 22:09

She's a Mum and you have no right to question the choices she makes

Yes you have. If its not the right choice for the baby. I hate this 'well it's none of your business' attitude. I will disagree with anyone who thinks its ok to wean at 11 weeks. It's done for the convenience of the parents, not the child.

PartPixie · 19/01/2014 22:10

Yanbu to be concerned. Premature babies are sometimeweaned early on the advice of their doctors. 11 weeks seems very early. It would certainly be too early for a full term baby. Next time you see them I would try and ask the what their paediatrician had said about weaning. If you are right and they are doing this without medical advice then I don't think there would be anything wrong with saying that surprises you or that 11 weeks is very early.

Early weaning can be dangerous. It's a medical fact not a case of knowing your baby. Yes parents can make alternative decisions but if they are going to do so they should be aware of the facts or be doing so under specialist advice.

harriet247 · 19/01/2014 22:30

I really struggled to reach 17 weeks too,dd was early but very very big and she was not satisfied at all by milk. Started out with two tea spoons of baby rice a lady and worked up. She also had terrible reflux so am not sure if this also caused problems but the reflux stopped immediately and she is a very healthy little girl

jacks365 · 19/01/2014 22:36

The reason for not delaying finger foods past 6 months is that the chewing actions that are used help exercise the jaw muscles which helps with speech development for those who asked.

Most people make their own way in one way or another yes 11 weeks is early but it is possible it was advised. No point in saying anything though.

DollyHouse · 19/01/2014 22:38

Interesting, thanks jacks :)

WeddingComingUp · 19/01/2014 22:38

Harriet - ds1 was the same. He was a huge baby, he had rolls of fat and was drinking up to three times the 'recommended' amount of formula for his age but still wasn't satisfied and wanted more.

A couple of spoonfuls of baby rice completely satisfied him and his milk intake dropped to a 'normal' amount.

RhondaJean · 19/01/2014 22:46

Prem babies do not need to be weaned early because of lack of iron, that's nonsense, you get iron and vitamin supplement to give them.

When my oldest was born advice was 4 months and that's when I weaned her and she's not had any adverse affect I am aware of so I do feel sorry when people get so stressed over the 4/6 months thing and I wonder what they think magically happens on the day baby is 6 months BUT this baby isn't even at its due date yet. That's concerning. I don't think there is anything you can do though op, and of course someone who weaned at a week old will be along to say its fine, just like my mother in law always says DHs asthma is nothing to do with her smoking because her cousin who didn't smoke had an asthmatic child, therefore the weight of medical knowledge is wrong.

notso · 19/01/2014 22:52

Size of baby has nothing to do with readiness for food. It is a very old fashioned theory. My 2 biggest babies both over 95th centile were both very hungry but not interested in food at all.

I don't think something magically happens at 6 months making them ready for food.
I do think the NHS ready to wean signs are sensible.
Ability to sit up and stay in a sitting position,
Loss of tongue thrust,
Ability to see food, pick it up and put it to their mouth.
I don't know many babies under 5 months who can do all of these.

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