Dear Vagisil.....pray do tell what the actual fuck is this intimate area to which you refer?

[HoneyDragon]

Because I'm fairly certain I don't have one. Given the nature of your topical application products I think you may be referring to either my vagina or vulva.

Well Vagisil, that's actually one of my least intimate areas. In its time it has harboured a couple of small humans, not only did they take a trip both up and down it, they spent several happy months head butting it.

It has been acquainted with several men (incidentally non appeared scared by occasional sweating or indeed it's lack of pleasant floral scent).

On the top of that, I suspect my intimate area has been viewed by more medical professionals than my teeth. In fact my dentist is probably the only medically qualified professional who hasn't had look up there.

I also, occasionally let strange ladies look at it when they remove hair from it, before I go on holiday.


I have no objection to what you sell, I get that people want to buy it. But here's a thought, if your big enough and clever enough to be able to advertise on national tv than maybe you could be big and clever enough to say

"Hey, we're Vagisil and we'd like to stop your vulva sweating"

I mean please, just try it. Because then I won't have to find you all and shove your products up your intimate areas.


Kind regards

Honeydragon.

[PseudoBadger]

*dadinthehat

[dadinthehat]

Isn't the floral scent due to ladies farts smelling of roses?

[KurriKurri]

Vagisil is the invention of Beelzebub anyway - I used some once - never again, - would have burned less if I'd shoved two chillies and a firework up my intimate area.

Fortunately I am now old and single so a fragrant intimate area is low on my list of priorities, - carefree and stinky is my lifestyle choice.

[HoneyDragon]

Never apply Vicks to small children then insert a Mooncup btw.

It's breezy yet burns.

[SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius]

HoneyDragon - I really, really love you!

[dadinthehat]

Thank you PseudoBadger. I'll look out for that in Boots.

[Faithless12]

Honeydragon I have just read your post out to DH and we are now both in hysterics.

[Goldencity1]

Don't think I'll read this thread to the DH....he already finds the adverts far too explicit!

[Bootycall]

definatly would give me thrush. horrible stuff. love the post.

[DodgyHips]

Vulvas SWEAT?!

Vagisil is to stop them SWEATING?

Like, vulva deodorant?

For real?

[CuntyBunty]

Is it not for an itchy fanny then? Is it supposed to be like Femfresh? It will wash all the pheromones away.

They can go to hell; I am happy, nay, proud of my womanly musk.

[lambbone]

That's the stuff we call Kunt-o-Kleen in our house when the ad comes on. We are very refined.

You could always buy a tube to give to someone you think is a irritating twat.

[JupiterGentlefly]

I am actually a fan of the scented panty liners. I dont tend to use them but I don't mind. I did see the whole thread where most people sent them to Hades and thats fine.. But seriously why the fuck do they try and convince people they need to deodorise their foof???
I had BV once (happy to share) I needed a trip to the doctors PDQ can you imagine if I had thought oh gosh thats a bit whiffy must be in need of a clean of my intimate area!!

[RevoltingPeasant]

Honey I just spent a whole two minutes wondering why you were applying Vicks to small children, putting them in a Mooncup, and thrusting them up your lady parts. Is she a childminder or some kind of weirdo, I wondered?

Then I realised I'd got the steps in your post mixed up...

[meddie]

Scented pads are the work of the devil. Might as well take a brillo pad to my fanjo. Same effect and a bit cheaper

[Shallishanti]

a very good point Jupitergentlefly!
Incidentally, do they really claim to be pH neutral? because actually your fanjo should be slightly acidic-which you can tell from the taste

[WandaDoff]

I thought vagisil was for itchy fanjos not sweaty ones

[StupidMistakes]

My question is where is all the penifresh ads? you know that special stuff for mens intimate areas cos they smell more than we do equally as much.

Planning on getting lucky, but don't smell of roses? penifresh the ultimate in male intimate hygiene, guaranteed to make you smell of flowers!

[mrstigs]

I agree men need a version. 'Sacfresh' or something. Though that sounds like something you would use on your bin...
Sweaty man balls have got to be more stinky than our poor old vulvas.

[Kundry]

Wanda, I don't think the makers of Vagisil care what you think it's for, as long as they convince you there's something wrong with your vagina that needs fixing with Vagisil bastards

[HoneyDragon]

SDTG I loves you too

Really they are missing marketing gold mines, I mean they've only cornered one half of the crotch market by sticking with females.

What about something for elbow creases. Or a scented airfreshener you could stick under your csection overhang?

Perhaps for the more taught ladies a fetching scented jewel for your belly button.

And for the older gentlemen a lightly scented spray to cling to ear hairs?

[endlesstidying]

To be fair I did once have my dentist peep at my "intimate area". That said I was in an intimate relationship with him at the time.

My neurologist has never shown the slightest inclination towards taking a look though!!

Otherwise I agree with every word you say :)

[Pixel]

I too thought it was just for ahem..'feminine itching' (the correct term I believe ) so I was forced to google, and Yes! it is indeed to stop odour from happening. Wonderful grammar there.

[TalcAndTurnips]

Honey - I think your Intimate Area sounds absolutely super.

Have you considered hiring it out as a licensed venue for weddings?

You could set up a nice temporary gazebo by the arse-cheek there - and themed staff could greet guests with a glass of shampoo at the front of the gusset (just next to the ornamental fountain and the seating plan board).