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Original poster

To ask my interfering friends to remove the online dating profile they posted...

30 replies

MeepMeepVrooooom · 12/01/2014 22:16

Grrr... Why do people just not believe you when you say you do not want to meet a man?

Ok I'm not against the idea if it happens naturally but I'm not really in a position to put the time aside for a relationship or even for harmless dating so absolutely wouldn't be seeking out a relationship at this point in my life.

Naturally my bloody interfering friends (I do love them dearly) have decided I should try online dating and have taken it upon themselves to sign me up. Now... I have had a bit of a giggle at some of the messages received and a few of the pics posted but once they leave tonight I have the full intention of removing it. However they now are saying the won't give me the password.

Would it be unfair to slowly torture them until they do? (In all fairness I hope I would just need to tell them very strongly to remove it and they would). Apparently I need to "lighten up a bit, and give it a shot", I do not think that I do.

OP posts:
SinisterSal · 12/01/2014 22:19

Hello again Meep I remember you and your horrible MIL thread last week.

No you do not need to lighten up, they mean well but fuck 'em.

I assume the site admins have a procedure for taking down 'unauthorised' profiles. Dunno, maybe they don't - but worth a try if your friends are acting the eejit

AnyFucker · 12/01/2014 22:19

I am not sure why you are being so good natured about it, tbh, unless you laughingly went along with it in the first place ?

I would be putting my foot down. It's not really a laughing matter. Give me the password or our friendship is at stake. Is it so difficult to understand ?

serin · 12/01/2014 22:19

I think it would be perfectly acceptable to use torture in this instance.

Passes burning poker

specialsubject · 12/01/2014 22:21

...and rams it where the sun doesn't shine...

how juvenile. If they won't give you the password, find some new friends.

GoldenGytha · 12/01/2014 22:22

I'm happily single since splitting from XH in 2002, just me and the DC and I don't want to meet anyone else either.

I'd be beyond furious if anyone did this to me, and I would seriously question my friendships if they did, especially as they won't give you the password.

Is there a phone number or anything for the site? I'd be trying anything to get the profile removed.

Can't stress enough how furious I'd be!

Original poster
MeepMeepVrooooom · 12/01/2014 22:22

Hi SS yes, I think after the last few months they are trying to cheer me up, they mean well but I do not want/need a man in my life right now haha. Thanks for that, I'll check it out just in case they refuse.

AnyFucker No they set it up without my knowledge before arriving at mine so really did have no part in it. However they are my best friends and although a little loopy there is absolutely no malice in it. They are just trying failing to get me dating again.

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Laurel1979 · 12/01/2014 22:22

That sounds dreadful that they've done this, almost like the sort of thing teenage bullies would do IMO! Some of my friends occasionally suggest introducing me to their eligible male friends (which I decline), but if they did this to me, that would be the end if the friendship I'm afraid.

tudorqueen · 12/01/2014 22:23

The more painful the better. It is intrusive, disgraceful and has the potential to be a complete embarrassment for you.

Real friends do not do this. Are you sure that they are doing it for your own interests, or just so they can have a good laugh?

AnyFucker · 12/01/2014 22:24

No malice ? Well, that's as maybe but it still isn't acceptable. It is controlling and reductionist of them. That's not "friendship". Tell them the profile is down by midnight tonight or you are reassessing what it means to be a friend. Seriously.

MisForMumNotMaid · 12/01/2014 22:25

So long as you know the user name and the email sign up address is yours, reseting the password will no doubt be very easy.

Arm yourself with those bits of info and let them play the game about the password.

Original poster
MeepMeepVrooooom · 12/01/2014 22:39

It wasn't set up with my email address.

They really aren't being horrible they were just messing about a bit, it's just the way they are and it's fine. They have actually given me the details now and I've tried to delete but can't within the first 24 hours Shock

Torture is definitely the way forward.

OP posts:
AnyFucker · 12/01/2014 22:42

If you are fine with it, that is your perogative

I wouldn't be fine with such controlling shenaginans from so-called "friends" though

Original poster
MeepMeepVrooooom · 12/01/2014 22:46

Oh trust me I am not impressed I just know that they didn't do it with bad intention. They thought it would be funny and and get a bit of a laugh. Which after the message from the man describing himself as "a deviant in bed" I have to admit I did laugh, a lot. And then the man saying "Is 5ft 2" a bit short for you?".

However I am slightly less impressed that I cannot get it removed till tomorrow evening. They were very apologetic as they were leaving so it's not worth it to get too annoyed about it, it's only 24hrs on a public dating website that I don't even want to use (cringe!)

OP posts:
SinisterSal · 12/01/2014 22:55
Original poster
MeepMeepVrooooom · 12/01/2014 22:57

I think since my privacy has been exploited I should get first dibs Sinister Grin

OP posts:
Fluffyears · 12/01/2014 23:39

One of my controlling friends sent me a text saying 'I'm looking at lonely hearts in paper for you, what age suits?' I told her in no uncertain terms she was out of order and her reply was 'well maybe I'll just call and leave your number with a few of them for you'. This and a few other things mean we are no longer friends. They have no right to interfere.

CaffeinatedKitten · 12/01/2014 23:45

That's scary Fluffy!

Why do some people assume everyone wants a partner? I'm happily single, a friend is unhappily single. She goes through dating sites at a rate of two or three a month. She can't bear the thought of remaining single, which is fine and dandy. Except she wants me to be the same. I think she sees my contentedness as a slight on her drive to attach. It's not. It's just that I'm not too good at sharing and quite like being a slob in my spare time:o

brokenhearted55a · 12/01/2014 23:48

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

MadAsFish · 13/01/2014 00:02

I would set up dating profiles for all of them......

With odd proclivities.

Original poster
MeepMeepVrooooom · 13/01/2014 00:04

Ooooooh now that sounds like fun haha.

Fluffy, thankfully my friends aren't that nutty. That sounds borderline psychotic.

OP posts:
BobPatSamandIgglePiggle · 13/01/2014 00:09

I doubt it was done with malice - Sarah Beeny has a site called Date my Mate or something hasn't she?

I'd explain that you're not ready, have a giggle at any messages then forget it.

If they do it against your wishes again sign them up to test massive dildos though.

Fluffyears · 13/01/2014 01:30

She was very controlling and I had to distance myself. I had only been single a few months and was enjoying it but she kept saying 'you need a partner, you need to have a man around'. Eh no ta I was having a great time and now I have a great partner who I met when I was ready and under my own steam.

Another example was when I asked if she had plans for the weekend and she said 'yes I'm going to xyz and you're babysitting!' Oh I went loopy you ASK you do not tell someone she is looking after your three delinquents. This was ok because I was single so couldn't possibly have plans!

Just laugh at it but make sure they know that dating is your decision and only yours. What if someone had been sexually assaulted but hadn't told anyone and wasn't ready to meet random men this type of thing could do untold damage.

Original poster
MeepMeepVrooooom · 13/01/2014 21:30

Ok so went back on tonight (the specified 24 hours before deletion) and it STILL won't let me delete. WTF??

OP posts:
EirikurNoromaour · 13/01/2014 21:33

You can probably edit it to remove photos and profile blurb even if you can't delete it. They seriously overstepped the mark and I hope they fully understand that.

Original poster
MeepMeepVrooooom · 13/01/2014 21:41

They sent flowers to my house today to apolgise. The felt awful when they realised I couldn't delete it. Could try and milk this Smile

I have managed to remove all but one picture apparently you can't go on with no pic Confused I'm away to upload a pic of the sea or something a delete the other one. Thanks for that suggestion, no idea why I hadn't thought of it [hmmm]

OP posts: