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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To be annoyed and possibly over reacting

69 replies

McPie · 11/01/2014 16:47

Db and sil have just came back from a holiday in the US and whilst they managed to be in a warm part they hit a flu epidemic.
She felt the need to come over and say hello while sniffing in the corner full of whatever bugs she picked up over there, most likely flu as she looked like death warmed up and could hardly walk in a straight line!
I am pretty sure my face said it all and the fact I stayed as far away as possible must have made it clear that I was not overly happy that she chose to possibly infect us all.
As soon as she left all the windows were opened to air the room, it's bloody frozen out there too, and I have already copped a couple of vit c in the hope I can escape catching her flu as I have 3 dc to deal with and really don't want to be ill at all.
AIBU to think that if you feel crappy in the way she did then you don't bloody go and visit others and spread it around?

OP posts:

MrsAMerrick · 11/01/2014 21:37

If she really had flu she would not have been able to get out of bed, let alone cone to see you, She might have had a cold, is that really an issue?

winkywinkola · 12/01/2014 06:19

You don't like your sil, do you, op?

JapaneseMargaret · 12/01/2014 06:38

Well, I would be pretty pissed off if someone came into our house and infected us with the flu, because having had the flu, it is about the worst illness I have experienced in my 40 years on God's green earth. I certainly was not capable of going visiting relatives when I had it.

Given that she probably didn't have the flu, YABU.

ihatethecold · 12/01/2014 06:42

You're really getting a hard time here op!
But, I'm with you.
Keep your germs in your own house.
Hope you don't all catch it.

Geckos48 · 12/01/2014 06:45

The flu comes in varying strengths. The only difference between a flu and a cold is the affect on the lungs! (And lots of sciencey stuff)

This 'you can't get out of bed with the flu' nonsense is just that. Nonsense

WellIShouldNever · 12/01/2014 06:47

YABU.
A nice person would offer her some hot water,lemon and honey. Get over yourself love.

gamerchick · 12/01/2014 06:51

Cold..flu.. vomits or any lurgy is not welcome in my house and anybody who tries gets short shrift. People are stupid.

kreecherlivesupstairs · 12/01/2014 06:58

YABU.

ChoudeBruxelles · 12/01/2014 07:08

Well if she managed to get to your house she doesn't have flu. Flu makes you feel properly ill - you ache all over and getting up to go to the toilet is the biggest effort. Along with a fever.

jetsetlil · 12/01/2014 08:39

YA so NBU!...I have just thrown off a real stinker of a cold which turned into a chest infection. Started on xmas eve and still coughing up phlem now. Unfortunately my dh brought it home so it inevitable I would end up with it. People need to keep their germs to themselves. There is a huge difference between having a bit of a cold and a bad one.

StayAwayFromDeliriumDive · 12/01/2014 09:29

Geckos I would be very interested to see the evidence that supports this...

The flu comes in varying strengths. The only difference between a flu and a cold is the affect on the lungs! (And lots of sciencey stuff)

I would find the sciencey stuff of particular interest.

JoinYourPlayfellows · 12/01/2014 09:36

"Cold..flu.. vomits or any lurgy is not welcome in my house and anybody who tries gets short shrift"

So presumably you never have any visitors to you home ever, because people are often contagious with no symptoms at all.

winkywinkola · 12/01/2014 10:18

Gamerchick, that's fine if you don't let people with sniffles in your home. The op doesn't like it either but she let her sil in and let her stay after she had realised the sil had a cold. Then decided to bitch about her rather than asking her to leave.

I can't imagine real flu ever being as mild as a cold.

Geckos48 · 12/01/2014 11:32

For people who think that the flu is just some intense illness that hospitalises people or leaves them bedridden whenever it is caught, how do you think it spreads? Where do you think it comes from?

Obviously the flu is dangerous to the very old and the very young but it is not something that is only found in the bedridden!

gamerchick · 12/01/2014 11:46

If people didn't bitch about other people.. then large sections of forums would be tumbleweed.

winkywinkola · 12/01/2014 11:48

Doesn't mean they can't be AIBU though.

winkywinkola · 12/01/2014 11:48

I meant doesn't mean they can't be unreasonable though.

ReluctantBeing · 12/01/2014 11:50

Yanbu. I hate people sharing their germs.

sixpencesings · 12/01/2014 11:52

Yanbu.

Featherbag · 12/01/2014 11:59

Why on earth did you feel the need to open all the windows, in this temperature?! I don't think you can blame your SIL for something so ridiculous, what an odd thing to do!

gamerchick · 12/01/2014 12:01

Doesn't everybody open the windows to freshen the air up? A few minutes of open windows helps stop that horrible stuffed up feeling you get from central heating.

hackmum · 12/01/2014 12:03

YABU. She had a bad cold. You and your children will constantly be exposed to people with bad colds. It's called life.

BTW, taking vitamin C will not help you combat the bad cold.

noddyholder · 12/01/2014 12:07

I had real flu this year and I was shocked at the severity. YANBU at all it floored me and I lost masses of weight and had no energy. I certainly couldn't have looked after young children or worked or anything

Original poster

McPie · 12/01/2014 12:07

I do agree that IWBU, at the time I went into a panic and tried to put physical distance between myself and her in the hope I would not catch anything from her.
I had a rotten cold before Christmas and everything virtually stood still for a week and I really did not want to be ill again, neither do I want my kids to be in all honesty.
I get that I may be in the presence of someone feeling fine but be full of bugs and they inadvertently pass them on, nobody can stop that but to visit knowing you are ill is still not something I would do.
My relationship with sil has nothing to do with this as I would have been annoyed had it been anyone else, family or friend!

OP posts:

StayAwayFromDeliriumDive · 12/01/2014 13:48

But Geckos - where is the sciency stuff? You know the bit that says it is the same as a cold?

I'd be really interested to read the research papers and pass on the information to my patients? I think the DH would be interested too; there seems little point in spending millions on a vaccination programme if there is so little risk?

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