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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Do you think watching horror films infront of children is the as bad as watching explicit films? [edited by MNHQ]

214 replies

HowlingTrap · 04/01/2014 12:01

Sorry the title is very emotive, I ran out of room to explain it properly.

its something that has always bothered, especially that its something that since i was a young child I know has gone one within society, people seeing nothing wrong in watching horror films in front of young children.
i have been around people who have almost done this infront of my children, switching on a horror film with children in the room and looked at me like I was mad when I went crazy at the thought. It's scary how prevalent it is and has been for many generations.
I actually said once "would you watch porn infront of a child' and they all replied with a chorus of 'of course not !"
Aibu to think theres not a huge amount of difference? its both 18 rated material for a reason?

OP posts:
SPsWantsCliffInHerStocking · 04/01/2014 12:06

Its two different things so YABVU

My cousin put a horror on when she was babysitting us. She said if we didn't want to watch we should go to bed. Brother ran and I didn't. I wish I had. Doesn't mean she's the same as a peadophile!

Some horrors are 15. Is that ok?

StickEmUpBigStyle · 04/01/2014 12:06

Depends on the children I guess.
I was shown poltergeist when I was 9. Loved it. Mum knew I'd love it.
Set of my passion for ghost horror.
I still love it now.

I thought the most gory bit was the maggots on the meat. Eww.

Then again, I saw Saw 4 (this one first) at 25 ish and I was quite disturbed. I've not seen the others because of it.

So who knows really.

TheMuppetsSing · 04/01/2014 12:10

Paedophiles no, don't be so ridiculous and insulting to the victims. Idiots yes, absolutely. Emotionally and mentally abusive, possibly.

Finola1step · 04/01/2014 12:11

Nonsense. You can not even begin to c

FWIW I do think its unacceptable to watch horror films or any films with a string adult narrative in from of young children.

I do not know anyone who watches such material in front if their children.

Pixieonline · 04/01/2014 12:12

Yes, you are completely unreasonable in your title to compare the two. Horror movies vs a peadophile?????

As for exposing children to horror movies vs porn movies, I agree with you, both need to be age restricted and restrictions observed by adults.

BlingBang · 04/01/2014 12:12

Are you having a laugh? And what age are you talking about here?

Finola1step · 04/01/2014 12:13

Oops. Should say "you can not begin to compare the two issues".

However, you are perfectly entitled to be cross at people who may watch horror films in front of your own children. In my world, this just wouldn't happen.

SpecialAgentFreyPie · 04/01/2014 12:14

This is so fucking insulting I don't really have words. Angry

Forcing a child to watch porn? Yes, Paedo.

Comparing watching a horror in front of a child to the rape of a child? Obviously not bloody ideal but you need more than a grip if you think they're remotely similar.

Seriously, how dare you minimise something so life altering and horrific to a shitty parenting choice? Angry

DoubleLifeIsALifeOfSorts · 04/01/2014 12:15

Why would you compare this to paedophilia? Is there a reason beyond sensationalism?

TidyDancer · 04/01/2014 12:15

That is completely ridiculous.

Watching a horror film in front of a child is not okay, but it not comparable to porn.

I agree with TheMuppetsSing, it is insulting to victims to compare the two.

WaffilyVersatile · 04/01/2014 12:16

erm no its completely different.

I was allowed to watch CERTAIN films from about the age of 9. Poltergeist, Alien, Terminator and my dad and I used to watch a Hammer horror every weekend. I loved watching them and had a keen interest in how they were made so my Dad would let me watch any kind of "making of" things that he could too.. I watched nightmare on elm st at about the same age but while at a friends house and it didn't freak me out half as much as it did her!

I think it depends on the child to be honest as well as the film. I would probably let my kids watch Poltergeist but there is no way I would let them watch Saw or Hostel..

manicinsomniac · 04/01/2014 12:16

No, of course not!

It's a stupid and potentially damaging thing to do but the two things are nothing alike.

  • The horror films thing - poor parenting that might cause a child considerable distress.

  • Paedophilia - one of the most disgusting crimes we have that is extremely likely to cause a child long term and permanent distress.

fanjoforthemammaries7850 · 04/01/2014 12:16

I was shown a really disturbing horror film when I was about 7.

It gave me nightmares for ages and really did disturb me.

So I can sort of see where you are coming from,although I think they are two different things.

They are both exposing children to adult material though.

BlingBang · 04/01/2014 12:18

Grew up watching the horror movies of old like The Birds and Psycho etc. I'm a lot stricter with my own kids but then horror movies are a lot more evil and blood and guts based these days.

Was in a cinema watching I Am Legend when very little kids were watching. But I have let my kids watch Shaun Of The Dead as I see it more of a comedy and they love Zombies - forgot how gory it was at bits and swearing - ho hum...

MammaTJ · 04/01/2014 12:19

I wouldn't want to watch a horror film even now, but I wouldn't equate it with being a peadophile.

I wouldn't think very highly of someone who showed a horror film to my children though. They certainly would not be in their care again.

My DStD had seen all the Nightmare on Elm Street films by the age of 9 though and is fairly ok.

DioneTheDiabolist · 04/01/2014 12:19

YABU. I can't believe that you are equating watching a movie to having sex with a child.

Your post minimizes the impact of child sexual abuse OPAngry

Thisisaghostlyeuphemism · 04/01/2014 12:19

I don't think the op meant it to come out like that??

I think she means - should people feel as angry as those who show horror movies to children as we do about those who show porn to children?

FarelyKnuts · 04/01/2014 12:20

If you had said is it potentially traumatising to expose young children to adult horror movies then I would say yes absolutely.

To make it akin to pedophilia is a step too far for me and greatly minimises the effect for csa survivors.

randomAXEofkindness · 04/01/2014 12:23

My mum used to turn off Eastenders if someone came in for a peck on the lips, but she let us rent 5 horror films a fortnight off the mobile video van. Absolutely fucking shit scared. I don't know why I watched them - probably because it was all he/we had. I never watch horrors now. I try not to ever let the kids see anything scary on the tele. My brother's got a habit of putting violent stuff on - I just shout "Put it off NOW!" He doesn't get arsey about it, but I wouldn't care if he did. It only takes one image to give them nightmares. DD1 still gets frightened when she thinks about a batman ad she saw.

I think I know what point you were trying to make, but you won't get much sympathy for your case here because your heading is rubbish. You shouldn't have mentioned the peodophile thing, it's a crap analogy.

SofaKing · 04/01/2014 12:29

Not at all similar. My cousin put on Psycho 2 when babysitting me cos I was annoying, I was about four. My mum gave him hell when she came in, and I had nightmares for about a week.

That does not in any way come close to the experience of an abuse victim.

RhondaJean · 04/01/2014 12:34

No because the reason paedophiles make children watch porn is for their own sexual gratification. They get a kick from it.

Most people watching horror in front of kids aren't doing it to get an extra kick because the kids are watching it. They are doing it because either they've assessed the film and their own children (like me letting my then 12 year old watch the original carrie) or because they haven't thought about it at all. Agreed it can be very irresponsible deoending on teh circumstances but without that motive of sexual gratification there really is no comparison between the two.

maras2 · 04/01/2014 13:24

Do you actually know what the word means OP?

YouStayClassySanDiego · 04/01/2014 13:31

You were daft to use such an emotive title.

Of course any parent who puts in a horror/gory or really scary film in front of a young child who reacts badly is a pillock.

You cant equate it with paedophilia though.

BeyondTheLimitsOfAcceptability · 04/01/2014 13:32

I see what you mean, why is it not as indefensible to show a child 18 rated violence as it is to show them 18 rated sex scenes.

Using "paedophile" to explain your point probably wasnt a good idea though...

I'd say the difference is the intent, in all cases, whether you are meaning to scare/harm the child by showing them or whether you just don't care that they may be harmed. Neither is good of course, but there are people (their partners turn up here often enough) that watch porn in front of their kids just because they don't think it will harm them, just the same as there are people who show their children 18+ horror with the intention of scaring them.

SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius · 04/01/2014 13:33

I think, if HowlingTrap had asked, "AIBU to think it is traumatic and wrong to watch horror films in front of small children?", she would have got a very different response.