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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

re colleagues bonus being more than mine

44 replies

sykadelic15 · 30/12/2013 18:28

I'm trying very hard NOT to be upset by this but it's another example of favoritism at work and it's really getting to me.

I work p/t. My colleague works f/t... when she's here...

Long story short (and it's STILL long-winded): I work in a small office and she is my only colleague. My work is different to hers. She never does my work, I sometimes do hers, mostly when she needs help or is off sick (again).

She has a retirement account, I do not and the bosses won't provide one. She has a parking space they pay for, I do not and have to park in the free parking way up woop-woop (cross the street, stand in the weather, etc etc). She has worked here for 5-6 years (something like that). The girl who worked in my position left because of the favoritism but according to my colleague I get treated better than the previous girl did (she likes to remind me of her special treatment from time to time and how much it bugged the other girl). She makes $3+ an hour more than me (which makes a sizeable difference if she were working the same hours as me).

This year she was off sick a LOT. She had 3 minor surgeries (I say minor but it was still slice and dice). I don't of course blame her for being off sick, but she ALWAYS scheduled them for a Wednesday so she could the next 5 days off. That's 9 days off. She then had a more major surgery (this time they booked it for Monday) and she took the week off (totally reasonable to have the week for this one). So now we're at 16 work days. She ALSO took a week off for annual leave (21 days total so far). That's not including the random (but often) days off for head colds and the like (so she says). I know she's been off for more than 3 weeks, I'm willing to bet it's more than a month. ALL PAID!!! She also did some "overtime" during the week following her week off. She wouldn't have needed the overtime if she'd scheduled the appointment for a reasonable date (or done the work prior to the surgery). I also had to stay an extra 2 hours and get paid for it every time she's off sick. So it's cost the bosses more for her to be off sick than if she were actually here... (and lets not mention the FB games she plays... she has a serious addiction and plays it every chance she gets -- i.e. when they aren't near her desk).

I on the other hand had 2 sick days and 3 annual leave days. Those annual leave days were immigration related and COULD NOT be avoided (and I had no say over scheduling). I also had to drive 3 hours one-way and they were 9am appointment so I couldn't go before or after work so in no way were they considered "holiday" to me. I have not had my "week off" this year either. I did ask for the Monday prior to Christmas off but my boss said no (I did get a half-day but that was only because I had scheduled a medical appt). The friday following Christmas my colleague was "sick" and took a long weekend.

So there you go. I'm trying to rationalise that maybe she wasn't off much in prior years and it "built up". Maybe her boss (though it's the same business her boss "rents" from the main boss) paid extra for her to get a bigger bonus... but I'm just... upset.

AIBU to be upset? It's not really the money... I mean it IS but it's also that she seems more valued. I have to do her work while she's off sick and I feel like I should tell them "no. I'm not paid to do that. She's not here so it will have to wait". I don't get paid extra to do her work so maybe I should ask to be paid overtime by the boss (i.e. time and a half) if I have to stay past my regular hours?... but I don't want to be a bitch or lose my job over it. Should I talk to the boss and if so.. what should I say? Or should I just apply for another job and leave?

What would you do? AIBU to be this bothered by it?

OP posts:
Lemongrab · 30/12/2013 18:32

Yanbu to be feeling upset. Your colleague sounds like a pain in the bum. If I were in your position, I'd probably be looking for another job.

noblegiraffe · 30/12/2013 18:33

I thought bonuses were related to performance not sick days.

If she is full time and you are part time is your bonus pro rata similar?

mynewpassion · 30/12/2013 18:36

Yabu and so us she. You should never share pay or bonuses information. Breeds resentment like this

Orangeanddemons · 30/12/2013 18:40

I disagree, you should be able to share information like that. I know that either the last government or the EC were looking to implement a law which stated that all employees should know what the whole workforce earn

maddy68 · 30/12/2013 18:41

It will be a % of salary. Therefore she is full time, earns more, gets greater %

Plus her sick time has nothing to do with you, do you really thing she books surgery fir a Wednesday? That will be the day the surgeon books for that kind of surgery.

addictedtosugar · 30/12/2013 18:45

% of your take home, is that the same? In which case its what most of the bonuses I've ever had look like. I get more bonus than the people who work for me, as I get paid more.

I'm more worried about you not taking any holiday. You should get min 28 days (pro rata'd sp???) . And your entitled to take them.

We only pay more than straight time for OT if its past 6 or weekends. But you should get paid for the extra if thats within your contract (I'm not allowed OT, but can take lieu for weekend working. Long days are just suffer it, but sounds like you have a different set up.)

I agree with PP tho. I'd be looking for a new job. She sounds like a piss taker. Oh, and stop doing her work, unless it impacts what you can do.

Optimist1 · 30/12/2013 18:46

She's obviously performing very well but not necessarily as detailed in her job description .

LIZS · 30/12/2013 18:46

Most bonus schemes are discretionary . She presumably earns more ft than you do pt so even if % were equal hers would be greater. If you have an issue with her attendance and you feel hard done by as a result then take put in a grievance. However sickness is very difficult to argue against and presumably she has had the approval of her manager. You are better focussing a discussion on how your leave hasn't been approved and whether that is unfair treatment . In UK pt staff are not supposed to be disadvantaged but not sure you are in UK.

paxtecum · 30/12/2013 18:48

You are very fortunate that you don't have her ill health.
I don't suppose she is having operations just so she can take time off work.
She is very fortunate to have supportive bosses.

YABU.

OodToSeeTheBackOf2013 · 30/12/2013 18:48

I didn't think the op was in the UK.

paxtecum · 30/12/2013 18:49

I hope your bosses treat you well if ever you have the misfortune of ill health.

Stokes · 30/12/2013 18:58

The only bit you're not BU about is the gaming. The rest of it sounds fair enough. She can't help her ill health.

Finola1step · 30/12/2013 19:01

YANBU to be annoyed at such blatant favouritism. But... You know far too much about her business. Her medical record is really no concern of yours.

I am heading into my 4th year of a pay freeze. No performance pay rises, no inflation pay rises, no bonuses. Just a big increase in the cost of living so my pay has to stretch much further to provide the basics. Lots of people in the same boat. Am lucky to have a steady job.

Discussing pay and bonuses causes problems. Focus in your own hours and your own holiday entitlement. Enjoy your bonus. And if you really can't tolerate the situation, start looking for a new job.

Original poster
sykadelic15 · 30/12/2013 19:03

No I'm in the US. 28 days... oh how I miss thee. Here's it's maybe a week off.

Re telling each other the bonus amount... the company checkbook is used by all of us to pay bills. So the stub is sitting right there in plain view.

The qn re booking for a Wednesday, I know she's booking them for those specific days. I asked her the first time how it all worked and she got to schedule it from a list of days and wanted the extra days. She could have picked the Friday but wanted to go riding (motorcycle) with her new boyfriend on Saturdays and knew she wouldn't be better in time if she picked Fridays. She told me all this. The major surgery is the only one she didn't personally schedule.

And you're right, her sick time doesn't really have anything to do with me except when I am expected to do her work (which is EVERY time she's off sick).

I tried the percentage thing but it didn't work. I really think the other boss paid extra for her to get extra.

OP posts:
WhoNickedMyName · 30/12/2013 19:06

YABU.

Perhaps if you put as much time and energy into your own work as you do into monitoring your colleague you'd get a bigger bonus too.

Original poster
sykadelic15 · 30/12/2013 19:08

This is a VERY small office and I have no choice to hear about her ills... that is the kind of person she is.

The surgeries (except the last) were mostly elective. She is a drinker and a smoker but isn't of "ill health". I too think my boss was great to pay her her regular pay while off sick, but I think her attendance should have been taken into account with the bonus (funnily enough, she also said she expected less prior to receiving the bonus).

It's the favouritism and also that I couldn't even get the ONE lousy god damn day I asked for and yet she takes off sick every month at least one Monday or Friday.

OP posts:
RandyRudolf · 30/12/2013 19:12

I've been in a similar position where a colleague had a lot of time off due to numerous surgeries and procedures throughout the year. They weren't entirely considered necessary by her GP which is why she decided to go private. She would time them so that her recovery time coincided with various family events and extend the time occasionally. She was foolish if she thought we hadn't twigged on after a couple of years of her doing this. In one way I felt for her because she did have problems but I believe she milked it on occasion too. Our employer was very lenient though and didn't take the matter further until redundancies loomed.

I'm not sure there's anything you can do and to be honest, from the sounds of it you may be happier in a new job.

Skinheadmermaid · 30/12/2013 19:12

I had a colleague much worse then that, it actually caused me to leave my job and am now unemployed.
She was constantly on facebook, took her till 5.30 pm to read an email sent at 9- and that was only if it was marked urgent-! Oh and she would read it but forget about a reply for another 3 days!
She did absolutely no work, i was doing all her work as well as mine and was absolutely overwhelmed.
Anything she was specifically asked to do she would delegate to me.
She would book herself leave in the diary without telling anyone when everyone else had to give 2 months notice & be approved by the director...
She was late every single day
She would go for hour and half to two hour lunch breaks when she knew i was waiting and starving hungry
I told all this to my bosses and got 'oh i know its disrespectful but theres nothing i can do, shes not a clock watcher.'
EXCUSE ME?!

After i left i found out from a collague that is still there that
SHE IS THE BOSSES WIFE'S COUSIN

I imagine the same is with your collague....

RandyRudolf · 30/12/2013 19:13

1 week off in the US? Is that all you get?!!!

Original poster
sykadelic15 · 30/12/2013 19:18

WhoNickedMyName I understand it's hard to envision my working environment. I work in a VERY small office. Her desk is 3 metres from mine. She tells me EVERYTHING about herself (including sex life) on a daily basis. I notice when she's not here because I have to do her work (I say have because I really can't think of a way to say no to her boss and not get into shit) and because I haven't heard about how drunk she got on the weekend, or any manner of other drama.

I'm also very agitated right now and have been because I haven't been allowed my bloody week off. I deliberately didn't take it earlier because of her surgery and I don't want to sit around the house doing nothing so I'd planned to travel back to the home country ($$$) but hasn't worked that way with my husbands time off.

Seriously, the denial of Monday off was the straw for me. I've put up with a lot...

OP posts:
Original poster
sykadelic15 · 30/12/2013 19:26

RandyRudolf Milked! Thank you that's exactly the word I was looking for. I definitely feel she's milked her "issue" for all it's worth. I know there were other options but her health, her choice. And again I am very happy for her that they've "worked" and that the boss paid her her usual wage because that would have been quite a hardship.

But I can't help to have hoped it would "come out in the wash" so to speak and I'd be thanked for being so diligent and doing her work without complaining (even though it is NOT my field and her filing leaves a lot to be desired and I waste a lot of time trying to find stuff) with a decent bonus. And that's why I feel so unreasonable, because I know some people don't even GET bonuses so I should just quit my whinging...

OP posts:
Original poster
sykadelic15 · 30/12/2013 19:27

Oh, I should mention I had also hoped that when/if the time comes for me to need Mat Leave that I would be afforded the same sort of leniency with appointments and the like (even though you don't get paid Mat Leave here as a standard and the company is so small I'm not even eligible for the government scheme that would ensure they at least held my job for the 6 weeks mat leave period).

OP posts:
RandyRudolf · 30/12/2013 19:30

Reading about your employment and maternity conditions reminds of how lucky I am to be in the uk. I will not whinge again well not for a while

HermioneWeasley · 30/12/2013 19:31

If you don't feel valued, I would start looking for another role

steff13 · 30/12/2013 19:32

1 week off in the US? Is that all you get?!!!

I'm in the US, and I get 5 weeks off for vacation, plus two weeks sick time, and four personal days annually. It depends on the employer, but my experience with various employers is that vacation time is given progressively - none the first year, then a week, then after a couple more years two weeks, then after a couple more years, three weeks, etc.