re colleagues bonus being more than mine

[sykadelic15]

I'm trying very hard NOT to be upset by this but it's another example of favoritism at work and it's really getting to me.

I work p/t. My colleague works f/t... when she's here...

Long story short (and it's STILL long-winded): I work in a small office and she is my only colleague. My work is different to hers. She never does my work, I sometimes do hers, mostly when she needs help or is off sick (again).

She has a retirement account, I do not and the bosses won't provide one. She has a parking space they pay for, I do not and have to park in the free parking way up woop-woop (cross the street, stand in the weather, etc etc). She has worked here for 5-6 years (something like that). The girl who worked in my position left because of the favoritism but according to my colleague I get treated better than the previous girl did (she likes to remind me of her special treatment from time to time and how much it bugged the other girl). She makes $3+ an hour more than me (which makes a sizeable difference if she were working the same hours as me).

This year she was off sick a LOT. She had 3 minor surgeries (I say minor but it was still slice and dice). I don't of course blame her for being off sick, but she ALWAYS scheduled them for a Wednesday so she could the next 5 days off. That's 9 days off. She then had a more major surgery (this time they booked it for Monday) and she took the week off (totally reasonable to have the week for this one). So now we're at 16 work days. She ALSO took a week off for annual leave (21 days total so far). That's not including the random (but often) days off for head colds and the like (so she says). I know she's been off for more than 3 weeks, I'm willing to bet it's more than a month. ALL PAID!!! She also did some "overtime" during the week following her week off. She wouldn't have needed the overtime if she'd scheduled the appointment for a reasonable date (or done the work prior to the surgery). I also had to stay an extra 2 hours and get paid for it every time she's off sick. So it's cost the bosses more for her to be off sick than if she were actually here... (and lets not mention the FB games she plays... she has a serious addiction and plays it every chance she gets -- i.e. when they aren't near her desk).

I on the other hand had 2 sick days and 3 annual leave days. Those annual leave days were immigration related and COULD NOT be avoided (and I had no say over scheduling). I also had to drive 3 hours one-way and they were 9am appointment so I couldn't go before or after work so in no way were they considered "holiday" to me. I have not had my "week off" this year either. I did ask for the Monday prior to Christmas off but my boss said no (I did get a half-day but that was only because I had scheduled a medical appt). The friday following Christmas my colleague was "sick" and took a long weekend.

So there you go. I'm trying to rationalise that maybe she wasn't off much in prior years and it "built up". Maybe her boss (though it's the same business her boss "rents" from the main boss) paid extra for her to get a bigger bonus... but I'm just... upset.

AIBU to be upset? It's not really the money... I mean it IS but it's also that she seems more valued. I have to do her work while she's off sick and I feel like I should tell them "no. I'm not paid to do that. She's not here so it will have to wait". I don't get paid extra to do her work so maybe I should ask to be paid overtime by the boss (i.e. time and a half) if I have to stay past my regular hours?... but I don't want to be a bitch or lose my job over it. Should I talk to the boss and if so.. what should I say? Or should I just apply for another job and leave?

What would you do? AIBU to be this bothered by it?

RandyRudolf Depends on the job. Technically there is no "time off" because I asked about it. He said he will just approve it as he sees fit. There is no accrual. No listing somewhere so I know. He said if it's reasonable he'd allow it.

I asked about using this years week and next years week and getting 2 paid weeks next year. He hummed and hahed and basically was non-committal. He said he'd allow me 2 weeks off because of how far it is, but he wasn't sure about the pay side.

I'm starting to wonder if I asked for my week from this year to just be paid if he'd tell me no that nothing is owing. My DH thinks I should just be "sick" more often but the idea of doing that makes me feel dirty...

Some sick days here in the US aren't paid at all so we are lucky in that regard. Depends totally on the company. A lot of lack of regulation.

Oh, I've been with my employer for ten years. I started out with a week of vacation, now I'm up to five.

What are personal days? How are they different to annual leave?

steff13 As you said, depends TOTALLY on the employer. No-one I know gets 5 weeks annual off. Nor is there accrual based on time served. It's a "benefit" that some people negotiate for. I know if I worked in a bigger city the jobs would be different and a bigger range of candidates they want to entice the best. My employer is so small there is no health insurance either and he is not legally required to provide it. I also could get fired tomorrow with no cause because he doesn't need to give me any (or any reason).

I need to know where you work Steff!!

Those working conditions explain why service is so good in the USA. Put a foot wrong and you're out!

I actually didn't know what the difference between personal days and vacation days were until recently. I just knew they were all paid days off. :)

With my employer, a personal day cannot be denied if it is requested at least 24 hours in advance. Due to the nature of my job, if I want to take vacation time, I have to request it at least 3 weeks in advance. However, if I needed to be off, say, this coming Wednesday for some reason, and I requested it today, my employer could not deny the request as long as I have personal days available. I've found this helpful for things like funerals. I have bereavement leave, of course, but that's only for family members. But, if my best friend's father passed away and I know him well and wanted to be at the funeral, I could take a personal day to take that time off.

Not to mention pay is so stingy. Minimum wage in Illinois is $8.25 an hour. That does not include service professions. I knew a hostess of a restaurant that made $4.50 an hour plus tips (more per hour than a waitress). It was a new restaurant so no-one came. She'd do 10 hours and come home with a pittance. This is why tipping your wait staff is important!

Ah, now I like the sound of personal days. I think they would work well here.

Do you know what's in her contract? Maybe she negotiated a better deal than you, maybe she's on a profit share. I think you are BU unless you know her contract is identcal to yours.

I would definitely make it your NY Resolution to get a different job in a new company.

There is so much about your post that is dissatisfactory and you wont ever get rid of your colleague, nor can you influence her terms and conditions, it will only ever wind you up (understandably so!).

Time to look for an employer who will value your contribution.

There is no contract for either of us. There rarely is unless you're in a salaried position. Some businesses do them, but the only stuff I had to fill in was my immigration stuff because I wasn't a citizen at the time.

My bosses are older (for example calling photocopying "taking a picture" and call a legal notepad a "tablet"). I know that my colleague knew the bosses wife before she got this position... and she's local (5 mins away and lives near the boss) whereas I have to commute 45 mins... and crossing the Mississippi River from another state.

sykadelic, I would not put up with that, especially for minimum wage. Generally a larger employer will offer more benefits, and they're more equipped to do so. I think it's time to look for something else. I had better benefits working at a local grocery chain when I was in high school than you seem to have now. What sort of work do you do?

Steff13 I'll PM you my actual position. Clerk/assistant type stuff.

I think it would not be unreasonable to be annoyed that your bosses don't get cover or have a system in place to cope with the workload when an employee is off sick. I think YABU to blame the other employee, or imply she didn't deserve to take any leave because she had taken sick days. It sounds like she has had a terrible year, health wise, would you really trade places with her for a bigger bonus?

Never have I felt so grateful for our employment laws in the UK. US sounds shit! Sorry for what you're going through OP - agree with others that you need to look for somewhere that appreciates you more. When you find yourself in a position that you're monitoring everything a colleague does, it's time to check the job boards.

RunnerHasbeen I won't get into the health stuff, it's not the crux of the issue because I HAVE been ill this year but I've scheduled my appointments for after work or before work.

Ignoring the surgery days she's still had more time off this year than I have. She constantly takes "sick" days when I know she's not sick (FB doesn't lie and she'll accidentally reveal what she got up to whilst regaling me with stories).

I DID get a chance to talk to my boss fleetingly about a raise. I didn't mention the bonus because I REALLY think it's the other boss and neither he nor I have control over that (and working for her boss would drive me batty so that I would DEFINITELY not change... maybe I should consider it danger pay :P). I also mentioned not staying the extra hours and driving home in the dark. I'm losing my night vision and haven't had the time or money to see an optometrist. Yes I lose 2 hours pay if I don't but it's not safe so I won't do it for a lousy $20 extra.

Anyway I think that the opinion is a toss up (with the "YABU's" mostly thinking that I shouldn't know about it and get my nose out of her business). I do think the YABU's have a point but it's practically impossible at this time. Maybe though I should work on letting it bother me less... I did read an interesting article about meditation... maybe I should give that a shot to lower my stress levels.

I know I feel better for having ranted because I was close to crying with frustration when I first posted. My DH is at work otherwise I would have talked to him about it and I'll talk to him more when I get home. Thanks all :)

Sorry, but you sound resentful and exceptionally bitter! Adding up her sick days etc.

If you hate it that much, leave!

YABU

I just remembered something my dad used to say and thought I'd post it here:

For every evil under the sun, there is a remedy or there's none. If there is one, try to find it. If there is none, never mind it.

I just need to find it, or have the courage to make it I think.

feathermucker You're right, I am bitter. I'm well aware of it, hence my post. I added up her surgery days after the Monday incident. I knew it had been a lot but I had no idea if was that many (and I'm sure it's more but I honestly don't keep track... though I could probably check my pay and see when I got paid more and tally it that way).

I've been through a lot this this year (excluding issues with my colleague, my own personal and health issues). I try and remain positive but it's not easy. The bonus thing was something I had been discussing as a "it'll show me what they really think" thing and I think it has... but I wanted to know if others thought, in the face of the evidence (unreasonable to keep track or not) if others thought the treatment meant I should just leave... or if I should suck it up and hope that if it worked for her it'll work for me... or if I should just be more zen...

For now I've decided to try and be more zen because the stress will kill me quicker than any other health issues I have currently.